September 17, 2017: Sunday ONAIRprep

ODT: 20170917
PDF: 20170917

***DAILY DOSE OF WEIRD NEWS! (As an ONAIRprep subscriber, you can gain access to all of the work parts for the Daily Dose of Weird News, allowing you to edit for length and content – and also receive a custom tag specifically for your station or show which you can have updated at any time… ABSOLUTELY FREE! IT’S PART OF YOUR SUBSCRIPTION! Email me to get more information, FTP access and your free customized tag!)



Okay, gang, better watch out for my devastating wit, because today I’m setting my personality for “Stun!”

My ABS light came on in my car this morning, so I tightened my stomach several times. It’s still on, but I don’t think it’s a good idea to do crunches when I’m driving. — Duane Matz


“Be patient with everyone.” –1 Thessalonians 5:14

Therefore, as we have opportunity, let us do good to all people, especially to those who belong to the family of believers. –Galatians 6:10

Who is wise and understanding among you? Let him show it by his good life, by deeds done in the humility that comes from wisdom. — James 3:13



Blessed be your glorious name, and may it be exalted above all blessing and praise. — Nehemiah 9:5

Thought: God loves to hear our praises and songs of adoration. He longs to hear us call him Abba Father and King of the Ages. But better than all the praise we can muster and higher than the highest sounds of angels is something higher still: the very name of God. Let’s make a commitment to revere and hold as holy the name of our glorious God!

Prayer: Almighty God, Father of compassion and Creator of the Universe, I praise you for exerting your will on our world. Now, dear Father, please make your will clearly demonstrable in my life as I seek to live for you so that your name will be exalted. In the holy name of Jesus I pray. Amen.

The Thoughts and Prayers for Today’s Verse are written by Phil Ware. You can email questions or comments to

BIRTHDAY VERSE” OF THE DAY (The chapter and verse correspond to the month and day!)

Nehemiah 9:17 NIV = …But you are a forgiving God, gracious and compassionate, slow to anger and abounding in love…


(NOTE: Some holidays may be duplicated due to various calendars reporting conflicting dates)

Today is DOUBLE-DIGIT COUNTDOWN DAY. You now have 99 shopping days until Christmas. ***Feel free to begin panicking.

This is PLAY MY MUSIC OR ELSE DAY. In 2002 a 27-year-old gun-toting musician forced a southern Brazilian radio station to play his debut album for more than an hour after apparently having no luck opening the doors of show business. The incident ended after 70 minutes when Vinicius dos Santos surrendered to police. Nobody was injured and the deejay later informed listeners where they could buy the musician’s album.

Today is DOGGY DIAPER DAY. On this day in 1996 the U.S. issued a patent (#5,555,847) to Wanda M. Kelly for her Disposable Dog Diaper.  ***What can you say about your life when you suddenly realize your changing diapers on a dog?

Today is DON’T TELL ME HOW TO DRIVE DAY. In 1988 research results were released indicating that Americans did not want talking cars, cameras, or appliances that told them what to do or how to do it.  ***After all, that’s what a spouse is for.

Today is CONSTITUTION DAY, which commemorates the formation and signing of the U.S. Constitution by thirty-nine brave men on September 17, 1787, recognizing all who, are born in the U.S. or by naturalization, have become citizens. ***But it’s not a national holiday, because we don’t read it anymore. (audio clip)

Today is M*A*S*H DAY, marking the TV shows premier on this date in 1972. It lasted 11 years. (audio clip)


Batman Day
Citizenship Day
Constitution Day
International Country Music Day
National Monte Cristo Day
Time’s Up Day
VFW Ladies Auxiliary Day
Wife Appreciation Day

COMING UP NEXT (Just a list, we are not endorsing the holidays posted below. Find more holidays and link to their websites at


Air Force Birthday
Chiropractic Founders Day
Hug A Greeting Card Writer Day
National Ceiling Fan Day
National Cheeseburger Day
National HIV/AIDS and Aging Awareness Day
National Respect Day
Respect for The Aged Day
World Water Monitoring Day


Talk Like A Pirate Day
Get Ready Day
National IT Professionals Day


National Rehabilitation Day
*National String Cheese Day
School Backpack Awareness Day


International Day of Peace
National Surgical Technologists Day
Islamic New Year
RAINN Day (Rape Abuse Incest National Network)
Rosh Hashanah
National Teach Ag Day
World’s Alzheimer’s Day


American Business Women’s Day
Autumn (Autumnal Equinox)
Bright Pink Lipstick Day
Car Free Day
Chainmail Day
Dear Diary Day
Elephant  Appreciation Day
Hobbit Day
Ice Cream Cone Day
International Day of Radiant Peace
Love Note Day
National Centenarian’s Day
National Doodle Day
National Leg Wear Day
National Rock n’ Roll Dog Day
National White Chocolate Day


Checkers Day or Dogs in Politics Day
Fish Amnesty Day
Innergize Day
International Lace Day
International Rabbit Day
Kids Day (Kiwanis Clubs)
National Hunting and Fishing Day
National Museum Day
National Public Lands Day
National Seat Check Saturday
National Singles Day
National Snack Stick Day
R.E.A.D. in America Day
Restless Legs Awareness Day
Teal Talk Day


Bluebird of Happiness Day
Gold Star Mother’s Day
International Day of The Deaf
National Familial Hypercholesterolemia Day
Punctuation Day
Schwenkfelder Thanksgiving


Family Day
Math Story Telling Day
National One-Hit Wonder Day
National Psychotherapy Day
National Research Administrators Day
National Tune-up Day
(World) Ataxia Awareness Day
World Pharmacists Day


1787: The Constitution was completed and signed by a majority of the delegates attending the constitutional convention in Philadelphia.

1862: The bloodiest day in U.S. military history occurred at the Battle of Antietam when more than 23,000 were killed or wounded.

1908: Lt. Thomas Selfridge, a passenger in a plane piloted by Orville Wright, became the first airplane fatality when the craft crashed.

1920: The American Professional Football Association—a precursor of the NFL—was formed in Canton, Ohio.

1980: Anastasio Somoza Debayle, former president of Nicaragua, was assassinated in Paraguay.

1994: Heather Whitestone of Alabama became the first deaf Miss America.

2004: Barry Bonds became the third baseball player to hit 700 career home runs, joining Hank Aaron and Babe Ruth.


1179: Hildegaard of Bingen, a German abbess, mystic, author, and preacher who received visions of God from the age of 5, dies at age 82.

1575: Swiss reformer Heinrich Bullinger dies. Next to John Calvin, Bullinger exerted the most influence over the second-generation Reformers.

1630: English settlers change the name of Trimountain, Massachusetts, to Boston in honor of pastor John Cotton, formerly of St. Botolph’s Church in Boston, England.

1776: 247 Spanish colonists consecrate their California mission of San Francisco, today a city of 725,000.


  • actor (“New York Undercover”, “Thief”, “Girlfriends”, Cool Runnings) Malik Yoba 50 (audio clip)
  • actor (King Kong, The Kingdom, “Friday Night Lights”) Kyle Chandler 52
  • comedian Rita Rudner 61
  • actress (TV’s “Elvira, Mistress of the Dark”) Cassandra Peterson 66


(Music Artist Birthdays From

1923 : Hank Williams

1926 : Bill Black

1926 : Brother Jack McDuff

1929 : Sil Austin

1940 : LaMonte McLemore (The 5th Dimension)

1947 : Lol Creme (10cc)

1950 : Fee Waybill (The Tubes)

1950 : Mike Hossack (The Doobie Brothers)

1962 : BeBe Winans

1968 : Lord Jamar (Brand Nubian)

1970 : Vinnie (Vincent Brown – Naughty By Nature)

1976 : Maile Misajoin (Eden’s Crush)

1979 : Chuck Comeau (Simple Plan)

SECRETS OF THE UNIVERSE (Answering questions that have plagued mankind for minutes!)

Who invented the toothbrush?
Now don’t bristle, but that “who” will have to be collective. The toothbrush is an anonymous, evolving cultural artifact, not an invention. We begin with a twig, frayed at one end, which was a kind of ancient brush used at least as far back as the Egypt of the Pharaohs. They are still used in some rural areas of the United States. The modern toothbrush originated in China about the time that Columbus discovered America. They used bristles taken from the back of a hog’s neck and attached them to bamboo or bone to brush their teeth. (I guess you could say it was a kind of piggyback contraption.) Europeans adopted the device, but used horsehair for bristles. Nylon toothbrushes, considerably more sanitary, finally appeared, in the U.S. in 1938. I hope this information didn’t leave a bad taste in your mouth.


(None on weekends. Want a customizable version with your specific station tag, FREE? Email me for more information! )


(Not posted on weekends and U.S. holidays.)


(Not posted on weekends and U.S. holidays.)


(Not updated on weekends and U.S. holidays.)


OPEN: And now,, (Show Name), and (Station Call Letters) bring you As the Jungle Turns! When last we left the jungle, Millard the Monkey’s arch nemesis, Steve Mozart, was about to have a concert – and in order to make Mozart look bad, Millard replaced all of the music with sheets of nothing but lines and dots to confuse the musicians. Will his evil sabotage plan work?

CLOSE: Oh no! Why would Steve Mozart show up at Millard’s house? Does he know that Millard was planning to ruin his concert? Is he there to hurt Millard? Tune in again for more of the story, As the Jungle Turns!

***You may simulcast “As the Jungle Turns” on the Internet stream of your live broadcast only. Any other Internet use of “As the Jungle Turns” in whole or part including podcasting of your live broadcast is a violation of copyright law. Thank you for your cooperation on this vitally important issue. If you have any questions, please e-mail us and ask about “Jungle Jam & Friends the Radio Show” usage.


Ever wonder why our public education system is such a mess?  Well, here’s a clue… some of the people working in the system may not be educated well themselves! 

2002’s edition of the Washington, DC public school system’s standardized-test guide for elementary students was riddled with errors and typos, so they made a concerted effort to make the 2003 test perfect… and it came out riddled with errors and typos.  For example, one question asks the student taking the test to count an image of nine flowers. But then the only multiple-choice answers available were numbers between 22 and 30. ***MARLAR: This makes perfect sense in Washington D.C. though – because there you can increase spending while decreasing the national debt.



10. Being told to “Think Outside the Box” when I’m in the box all day!

9. Fabric cubicle walls do not offer much protection from any kind of gun fire.

8. That nagging feeling that if I just press the right button, I will get a piece of cheese.

7. Lack of roof rafters for the noose.

6. My walls are too close together for my hammock to work right.

5. 23 power cords, 1 outlet.

4. Prison cells are not only bigger, they have beds.

3. If you talk to yourself it causes all the surrounding cubicle inhabitants to pop their heads over the wall and say “What? I didn’t hear you.”

2. You always have the feeling that someone is watching you, but by the time you turn to look they’re gone

1. Can’t slam the door when you quit and walk out.


Impersonating an officer is a big no-no.  But if you’re an officer impersonating a woman, that could just be part of the job!

FILE #1: Police in Ulyanovsk, Russia, got a tip that criminals planned to attack a young woman in her apartment, so a male cop took her place. Igor Selendey is a marksman and judo expert. He borrowed a wig and makeup from a theater, shaved his face three times, put on a nightie and waited. At midnight, there was a knock. Two thugs burst in, making threats and demanding money. The cop begged them not to kill “her,” then closed the door. When back-up arrived shortly afterward, the thugs were already on the floor, unconscious and in handcuffs.

FILE #2: Teenagers have a tendency to get into trouble when they are bored and have nothing to do and such is the case for a pair of teenagers from Wisconsin. They apparently must have been REALLY BORED one day when they were wondering what it would be like to be shot. They were going to shoot themselves to find out, until a 34-year-old relative loved them too much to allow them to do that to themselves. . . so he did it for them! He shot both of them in the legs! They were sent to the hospital and he was sent to jail!

FILE #3: A judge has ruled that an Arkansas man cannot file any more lawsuits without permission from the court. This follows his filing of three lawsuits against the Arkansas State Police accusing them of using ”microwave transmission” and ”high frequency sound” surveillance equipment against him. He says they have harassed him so much that he almost lost his job. He also says he has asked them often to stop sending ”thought interceptors” and ”microwave transmissions” subliminally to him. ***MARLAR: Apparently he’s never tried tinfoil. It works for me.

STRANGE LAW: In Hartford, Connecticut, it is illegal to kiss your wife on Sunday.


This Is Your Brain On Drugs” is about people doing dumb things under the influence, but addiction is no laughing matter. If you or someone you know needs help, there’s a toll free number you can call 1-800-438-0380. That’s the Addiction Hope and Help Line at 1-800-438-0380.

A man helps a friend by paying a fine for him – but ends up in jail for doing so!

In Wilmington, North Carolina, Jermelle Caldwell was heading down to the courthouse to pay the fine of a friend. But he freaked out when he rounded a corner inside the building and came face to face with a metal detector. He nervously told the deputies, “I’ve gotta go to the car.” Unfortunately for him, the deputies decided to search him anyway, discovering 14 bags of marijuana and 10 bags of heroin in his pockets. He’s joined his friend in jail. 


What kind of cool accessories have that not yet made available on cars that you’d like to see? Self-driving cars? Ability to change paint colors by pushing a button? Message boards on the back of your car to tell drivers behind you to back off? The ability to talk directly with another car you see on the road?


QUESTION: What is the name of the Bible character that preached in a valley full of dead men’s bones?
ANSWER : Ezekiel (Ezekiel 37)


QUESTION: According to a survey at Yahoo! Shine, what do the majority of women (36%) say is the most important personality trait that makes a man “relationship material?”
ANSWER: Loyalty.


Pay attention! If our next player doesn’t answer all ten T/F questions correctly we start all over from question #1! First person to answer question #10 correctly is our winner!

1. Julius and Ethel Rosenberg were the first couple in space. (False, they were the first married couple to go to the electric chair)

2. M Scott Carpenter was America’s second man in space. (True)

3. Robert Frost read a poem at Bill Clinton’s inauguration. (False, John F Kennedy’s inauguration)

4. Clifford Irving admitted that his “autobiography” of Howard Hughes was a hoax. (True)

5. Charles Schulz’s most famous creation was the comic, “Garfield”. (False, “Peanuts”)

6. Mark Poll founded the American Institution of public Opinion. (False, George Gallup)

7. Malcom X’s real last name was Lex. (False, Little)

8. DeWitt Wallace founded The Reader’s Digest. (True)

9. NFL officials began throwing red colored flags after abandoning white ones in 1965. (False, Gold, not red)

10. NFL’s Steve Young is one of Brigham Young’s many great-great-great grandsons. (True)


You have to match the blank in the tabloid headline with the word or phrase that has been removed!

“Soldier _______ His Sergeant’s Daughter!” (MARRIES)

Private First Class Duncan Schneider has truly got guts. He recently finished training with his Oregon Army National Guard unit and prepared for deployment to Iraq to fight in the war. But before leaving, he quickly married his longtime girlfriend — which means his unit’s first sergeant is now his mother-in-law! 



Smith goes to see his supervisor in the front office. “Boss,” he says, “we’re doing some heavy house-cleaning at home tomorrow, and my wife needs me to help with the attic and the garage, moving and hauling stuff.”
“We’re short-handed, Smith” the boss replies. “I can’t give you the day off.”
“Thanks, boss,” says Smith “I knew I could count on you!”


The Lamaze class included a tour of the pediatric wing of the hospital. When a new baby was brought into the nursery, all the women tried to guess its weight, but the guy standing next to Melodie was the only male to venture a number.

“Looks like 9 pounds,” he offered confidently.

“This must not be your first,” Melodie said.

“Oh, yes,” he said. “It’s my first.”

“Then how would you know the weight of a baby?” she asked.

He shrugged. “I’m a fisherman.”


A distraught dog owner called a vet pleading for an immediate appointment. He explained that his dog had a large growth or swelling near the corner of its mouth, so I told him to bring the 
animal over.

When the man came in with his pet, the vet examined the dog as the man stood by, anxiously waiting. At last the doctor turned to him and asked, “Do you have any children?”

“Oh, good grief, is it contagious?” the man gasped.

“No,” the doctor answered. “It’s bubble gum.”


The average Alaskan eats twice as much ice cream as residents in any other state.   ***Maybe because they don’t need any freezer space to keep it fresh.

A Kern County, California, couple were ticketed for jaywalking because one of their chickens allegedly impeded traffic by wandering onto the highway.  ***They’re still trying to figure out why the chicken crossed the road.



“Everything Comes In Threes” – Not true. In reality, everything comes in ones. Sometimes, when three “ones” come in a row, it seems like everything comes in threes. By the way, in medieval times, it was widely believed that everything came in twenty-sixes. They were wrong, too. It just took them longer to recognize the pattern.

“You Learn Something New Every Day” – Actually, you learn something old every day. Just because you’ve just learned it, doesn’t mean it’s new. Other people already knew it, Columbus is a good example of this.

“You Get What You Pay For” – Clearly this is not true. Have you been shopping recently? Only a very naive person would believe that you get what you pay for. In point of fact, if you check your purchases carefully, you’ll find that you get whatever they feel like giving you. And if corporations get any more powerful, you soon might not even get that.

“You Can’t Take It With You (when you die)” – Well…, that depends on what it is. If it’s your dark blue suit, you can certainly take it with you. In fact, not only can you take it with you, you can probably put some things in your pockets.

“Nice Guys Finish Last” – Not true. Studies have shown that, on average, nice guys finish third in a field of six. Actually, short guys finish last. By the way, in medieval times, it was widely believed that nice guys finished twenty-sixth. You can see how limited those people were.



A team of Chicago zoologists saved a bottlenose dolphin that was nearly killed by a Speedo. The dolphin, nicknamed Scrappy, must’ve found the man’s swimsuit floating in Florida’s Sarasota Bay and got his head and torso stuck in the waist and leg hole. It was so tight, it could’ve severed an artery. After several days of monitoring the dolphin, the suit was still stuck; so they had to catch Scrappy and send in a “depantsing” team to remove it, then release him, naked and free, back into the bay. A spokesman said it shows that Speedos can be a threat to more than just good taste.


When we were living in Florida, we asked our new neighbor, a young mother, if she would like us to take the children to church where I taught 20 eager boys and girls. She happily consented.

All 22 children enjoyed hearing stories about the British professor who always taught each new class of boys, “It’s better to die than to tell a lie.” So each week as we settled in for school I would say, “Better to die .. . ,” and the class would respond, “. . . than tell a lie.”

Some time later the daddy took the family for a drive, and as they entered a sleepy town he ignored the posted speed limit. The mother called his attention to it, but he argued, “There’s no one around; why go that slow?”

Soon he was pulled over by a police officer, who asked, “Didn’t you see the speed limit sign?”

Daddy answered, “No, what sign?”

His son spoke up from the backseat, “Daddy, better to die than tell a lie!”

As the daddy flushed with shame the officer clapped him on the shoulder and said, “You’ve got a great son there. I’ll not give you a ticket this time, but you better start paying attention!”

Little words fitly spoken had a lasting impact on their whole family.

–Kay Hansen, Sautee, Georgia



Read: Ezekiel 18:1-18

The soul who sins shall die. —Ezekiel 18:4

When salmon travel hundreds of miles up rivers and streams to spawn, they are acting on instinct. They are in a sense being driven by an uncontrollable force.

I read about a young convict who thinks that human conduct is similar to that of the salmon. Referring to the murders he committed and to his own fate, he said, “Things just happen.” He thinks some kind of force was responsible for his pulling the trigger and killing two people. But he is wrong. Man is free and cannot blame his sinful actions on an uncontrollable force such as instinct.

More than 2,500 years ago, some Israelites were using a similar excuse for their sin. They quoted a well-known proverb that placed the blame for their sins on their ancestors (Ezekiel 18:2). But God told them they were wrong. He said that a good man will not be punished for the sins of a wicked son. Nor will a godly son be punished for the sins of his evil father.

Make no mistake. No matter what your situation, you are responsible for what you do. Stop offering excuses for your sins. Instead, acknowledge your guilt to God and accept the forgiveness He offers (Psalm 32:5). That’s the first step in exercising your individual responsibility. —Herb Vander Lugt

Our actions are accountable
In God’s just court above,
So we must face this certain fact:
We need His pardoning love. —Branon

There’s no excuse for excusing sin.



According to a recent study, if you’re incompetent, you’d be the last person to know it!

A psychologist who has studied incompetent people says they are the least likely to realize how useless they are. He reckons the skills needed for competence are the same ones needed to recognize it. The findings may explain why people with a poor sense of humor insist on telling bad jokes. Dr David Dunning studied dozens of poor students, many of them confident in their abilities, before reaching his conclusions. Dunning’s assistant, graduate student Justin Kruger, says, “Not only do incompetents reach erroneous conclusions and make unfortunate choices but their incompetence robs them of the ability to realize it.”  ***MARLAR: I don’t get it.


Got fat? Don’t drink the milk!
While children are urged to drink plenty of milk, a new study suggests that the more milk that kids drink, the fatter they get and, surprisingly skim milk is worse than whole milk. A survey of more than 12,000 children aged 9 to 14 showed that those who drank more milk weighed more than those who drank less. Researchers now say that kids’ basic beverage should be water and they note that in many parts of the world, kids don’t drink any milk at all and they end up with healthy bones. As far as getting calcium, leafy green vegetables have that and other nutrients and are low in calories. ***MARLAR: That might be true, but it’s not practical.  Have you ever tried making a chocolate milkshake out of kale?



We’ve heard of pedestrian crossings, cattle crossings, deer crossings… and now in Nebraska you might see a sign for a turtle crossing!

Now there are spots designated for turtle crossings at a wildlife refuge in Nebraska. To preserve rare Branding’s turtles, officials in north-central Nebraska have put up chain link fences to help herd them under U.S. Highway 83. Blanding’s turtles can live up to 70 years. They are listed nationally as a species of special concern, which means they could be headed for extinction or endangered status.  ***MARLAR: If these turtles can live for 70 years, maybe someone can teach them to use a crosswalk.



  • Get even with a bear that raided your food bag by kicking his favorite stump apart and eating all the ants.

  • Old socks can be made into high fiber beef jerky by smoking them over an open fire.

  • A hot rock placed in your sleeping bag will keep your feet warm. A hot enchilada works almost as well, but the cheese sticks between your toes.

  • While the Swiss Army Knife has been popular for years, the Swiss Navy Knife has remained largely unheralded. Its single blade functions as a tiny canoe paddle.

  • You can compress the diameter of your rolled up sleeping bag by running over it with your car.



(from Laurie Puhn, J.D., author of “Fight Less, Love More”)

Whatever the problem, these strategies melt away conflict.

1. Eliminate Dumb Factual Arguments: “You’re wrong. You don’t know what you’re talking about. The bailout was first signed under Obama,” argues your mate.   ///   Smart Tactic: When tempers flare ask yourself, “Are we arguing about a fact or an opinion?” If you conclude it’s a fact, immediately raise the white flag and say, “This is silly. We’re arguing about a fact. Let’s stop right now to fact-check on the internet.”

2. Avoid Post-Argument Arguments: After a heated verbal exchange, you finally hear the priceless word “okay” which offers you a mutually acceptable agreement on an issue.   ///   Smart Tactic: Lock your lips. Quit while you’re ahead. Recognize that you have found common ground and won the argument even if you haven’t gotten all that you want. Never make the provokingly dumb statement “I have just one more thing to say…” or you will re-start the argument.

3. Reject the “Whatever” Word: If someone asks you what you think about a hot-topic political, economic or social issue or even where you want to go for dinner, you might want to take the passive route by responding with the “W” word.   ///   Smart Tactic: Whatever you do, don’t say whatever. It blows people off and incites retaliation. Instead, think and give a specific answer. Watch this short entertaining video for a play-by-play enactment of the ‘whatever’ argument.

4. Engage, Don’t Enrage: Your annoying motor mouth mate, colleague, or friend desperately wants to persuade you that he/she is right about an issue. He/she won’t stop talking until you cave.   ///   Smart Tactic: Change your game plan. Don’t fight to be right. Instead, view the situation as a time to listen. Short-circuit the conflict by repeating neutral comments like, “that’s interesting,” and “that’s one way to see it.” This will tire your opponent. Then say, “I value your perspective, now I’ll share mine. I agree that we don’t agree. Will you?”

5. Orchestrate a Perfect Apology: You made an insensitive verbal gaffe and you want to apologize.   ///   Smart Tactic: Don’t say “I’m sorry.” It is a bad apology. Take full responsibility and use this 3-step apology to win the mercy you want: Step 1) Embellish the wrong as in “I made a big mistake when I criticized you in public” Step 2) Add the “because” clause, as in, “I’m sorry because…. I embarrassed you.” Step 3) Offer a plan of prevention, as in, “In the future, I will……. keep my mouth shut unless you say I can tell people about your job loss.”


(Not posted on weekends and U.S. holidays.)


(Feel-good stories! Only posted as new stories come available. Not posted on weekends and U.S. holidays.)


(Only posted as stories come available. Not posted on weekends and U.S. holidays.)


Congress is so strange. Someone gets up to speak, talks for a long time, but says nothing. Nobody listens, and then everybody disagrees.

If I could get all the people in my life who have ever done mean things to me in one room, I wouldn’t go in there because, man, those are some mean people! –LeMel Hebert-Williams


Marie Asner has been reviewing films for over 35 years. Her outlets include radio, print and Internet. For more in-depth movie reviews of the following films, visit Ratings from 1 (Low) to 5 (High).

SEPTEMBER 15, 2017…

American Assassin—This film is based on the first novel by Vince Flynn, as part of his book series.  It is an action film, plenty of thrills, starring newcomer Dylan O’Brien as the character Mitch Rapp. Several actors were interested in the role, but eventually it went to an actor about to begin his major career. The set-up has Rapp being an orphan in his early teens, selected by a CIA agent (Sanaa Lathan) as a protege, then sent to a trainer (Michael Keaton) to learn the tricks of the trade. What motivates Rapp is finding who killed his parents. This theme seems to dominate action films, doesn’t it? Even going back to “Batman.” As an adult, Rapp is sent to work on a case of multiple attacks and has to team with Shiva Negar from Turkey. They find their villain is “The Ghost” (Taylor Kitsch) and away everyone goes on an action adventure. You will recognize Scott Adkins and David Suchet (“Hercule Poirot”) also in the cast. “American Assassin” is rated R for violence. Rating of 2 for fans of the genre.

Brad’s Status—Ben Stiller is taking his college-age son to various schools and meets an old classmate. This makes Ben wonder just how good a father he is. Is he lacking something? Is he smart? Witty? Wealthy? The cast includes Austin Abrams, Michael Sheen, Jenna Fischer and Luke Wilson. “Brad’s Status” is rated PG 13. No rating.

mother!—Directed by Darren Aronofsky, this film is a combination comedy and drama. Stars Jennifer Lawrence and Javier Barden as a couple who have a weekend party. However, things don’t go exactly as planned. Also in the cast is Michele Pfeiffer. Aronofsky usually has surprises in his scripts. Hmm. “mother!” is rated R. No rating.

First They Killed My Father—Directed by Angelina Jolie, the film is based on the real life adventure in Cambodia by Loung Ung (played by Sareum Srey Moch).  The Khmer Rouge were in power at that time and living in Cambodia was dangerous. What to do—escape? The film is in the Khmer and English languages. Also in the cast are Phoeong Kompheak and Sueng Socheatca. “First They Killed My Father” is rated R. No rating.

SEPTEMBER 22, 2017…

Battle Of The Sexes and it had to happen, a film version of the tennis match between Billie Jean King (Emma Stone) and Bobby Riggs (Steve Carell.)

Kingsmen: The Golden Circle continues the story of a young spy teamed with an older spy. Stars Taron Egerton and Colin Firth.

The LEGO Ninjago Movie is an animated film with LEGO’S new boy hero, Lloyd (voice of Dave Franco) defending everyone.

Stronger stars Jake Gyllenhaal as Jeff Bauman, who lost his legs from the Boston Marathon bombing.

Woodshock has Kirsten Dunst taking a dangerous drug and the after effects of it.

Victoria and Abdul has Dame Judi Dench as Queen Victoria as she enters a new stage of her life.

# # # # #

WARNING: Don’t believe anything you read on the Internet or email (including stuff you read here) unless you can confirm it with another source, and/or it is consistent with what you already know to be true. The opinions in this publication are not necessarily those of Darren Marlar, Marlar House Entertainment,, or any company or organization affiliated with aforementioned. (Regardless of how stupid you may think those opinions are. So there – nyah!)

Darren Marlar credits all non-original material to the author whenever possible. All other material is original, used with permission, or author unknown. We welcome all comments, questions, and suggestions. Darren can be reached via his website at