Darren’s Daily Dose of News – April 21, 2009

darrensdailydoseofnews5It’s certainly not the way you want your sandwich heated. Two Domino’s Pizza employees now face felony charges in the aftermath of a YouTube video. Authorities in North Carolina say the video shows one of them putting cheese in his nostril and waving meat under his rear end while making a sandwich.  Police in Conover say Kristy Lynn Hammonds and Michael Anthony Setzer have turned themselves in. The Observer-News-Enterprise reports both face a charge of felony food tampering. Domino’s says there’s no evidence the food was served to customers. ***MARLAR: Domino’s fired the workers in thirty minutes or less.

Four baby pythons escaped on a passenger plane in Australia. A Qantas airlines spokeswoman says the resulting search forced the cancellation of two flights. A dozen of the non-venomous Stimson pythons were packed in a plastic foam box with air holes, inside the plane’s cargo section. When the flight landed, airline workers realized four of the snakes were missing. The airline says searchers never did find the loose half-foot-long pythons.  ***MARLAR: Samuel L. Jackson was not available for comment.

Police said a would-be robber got more than he bargained for when he tried to rob a Quik Thrift store with a knife. A quick-thinking customer, known only as “Caveman,” grabbed a step ladder and hit the suspect. The customer chased the suspect from the store using the ladder as protection. Police said the suspect had threatened to cut the store clerk’s neck if money wasn’t handed over. Police said the suspect escaped with some money, but he dropped much of it when he was hit with the ladder by the “Caveman” customer.  ***MARLAR: Apparently, a ladder is so easy to use, even a caveman can do it.

A 38-year-old Reno woman who originally planned to spend a quiet Easter at home is $33 million richer after hitting the second largest Megabucks jackpot in history at a Sparks casino. Rachael Renee Romanick hit the jackpot Sunday night at Terrible’s Rail City. The mother of four tells us she had only been playing the machine for about 10 minutes when she landed the big prize. She said she initially had no idea how much she had won. “I had to ask someone if this was for real. I kind of froze because this was so unexpected.” ***MARLAR: Also unexpected was the fact that she’d still have to work for a living because Uncle Sam wanted his share of the winnings.

President Barack Obama and the first lady together made $2.7 million last year, according to tax returns released by the White House.  ***MARLAR: It’s hard to live on such a meager income – good thing they live rent-free now.

A Massachusetts man has created a dating service called ScientificMatch.com.  Eric Holzle’s dating service has questionnaires similar to other dating services, but unlike others he bases compatibility on how you smell, and how you smell others!  It’s based on a science called “histocompatibility” which studies how one person interprets the scent of another.  ***MARLAR: Maybe we’ll start hearing songs like, “You Smell Wonderful Tonight,” “Careless Nostril,” “Noses in the Stream,” and “The First Time Ever I Smelled Your Face.”  (As if Pepe LePew didn’t have romantic troubles before!) 

Scientists have created a radio smaller than a grain of sand. ***MARLAR: But they had a really hard time plugging in the headphones.

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