Darren’s Daily Dose of News – April 30, 2009

darrensdailydoseofnews12Looks like Jason Leigh Markham needs a lawyer, again. Authorities in Janesville, Wisconsin, charge the 19-year-old with breaking into cars in order to pay an attorney.  Markham had faced prior drug charges. Authorities say he was caught stealing from cars to raise money to cover those legal bills. A criminal complaint says a man caught Markham inside his Camaro and held him for police. Officers say they found a GPS system, CDs and video games in Markham’s backpack. He now faces additional charges including felony burglary and bail jumping.  ***MARLAR: Jason says he’s learned his lesson, and won’t be stealing to pay his lawyer. He’s going to sell drugs on the street corner instead.

Scientists working in a lab in New York think they may have created one of the most dangerous forces in the universe — a black hole.  ***MARLAR: They’re not sure yet though. They still haven’t finished drawing straws to see who’s going to stick their finger in it.

Starbucks is blaming the mortgage meltdown for its slump in sales.  ***MARLAR: Because nobody can afford to have both a house and Starbucks.  

A pregnant woman who was fleeing a bear when she was struck by a slow-moving car said she would honor the euthanized animal by giving her baby the middle name “Bear.”  ***MARLAR: Sounds like she should name the kid after a car… like “Dodge.”

Police in Fayetteville, NC. are looking for a pregnant woman they say tried to rob a bank at gunpoint but left empty-handed after answering her cell phone. The woman demanded money from a teller, but she got distracted when her cell phone rang. She began talking on the phone and left without taking any money. They are still looking for the woman.  ***MARLAR: And the unborn baby will be charged as an accessory.

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