Darren’s Daily Dose of Weird News

In Britain, The Sun newspaper has reported that staff at the Department for Work and Pensions in Wales are refusing to wear their identity badges. Why? Well, apparently the title of the department has been shortened to DWP, which in Welsh means “stupid.”

Something stinks about the fish. Now, a Texas man is in jail, charged with swiping a church’s fish fry.  Authorities in (suh-GEEN’), accuse Patrick Russell Vaughn of stealing 800 dollars worth of seafood from the Our Lady of Guadalupe Roman Catholic Church. Police say they became suspicious after hearing reports of a man trying to sell fish from a cart in the landlocked community. The stolen cod, catfish, shrimp, and restaurant equipment were to be used at a church fish fry. Police recovered some of the seafood, but it all had to be tossed because of concerns over spoilage.  ***MARLAR: Fortunately, it was a church-sponsored fish-fry, so five loaves and two fish were enough.

A study by Britain’s University of Durham found that the key to happiness is to be self-employed. On average, entrepreneurs work longer hours than corporate employees, make less money and worry more about the future. However, that is more than offset by their independence, flexibility of hours and time spent with their families, so they have greater job satisfaction and are less likely to want to retire in their 60s. ***MARLAR: Why retire when you’re already sitting at home in your underwear all day?

A family in York, England, has spent $1500 on four operations and brain surgery to save the life of their pet rabbit. ***MARLAR: How lucky can a rabbit’s foot be if you have FOUR of them and still need brain surgery?

Late credit cards payments have taken a sharp spike, which analysts say is a sign that the economy is leaving consumers broke.  ***MARLAR: Whew!  It’s a good thing we still have our credit cards then, isn’t it?

According to Census figures, there’s over 50,000 Americans right now who are 100 years old. ***MARLAR: When asked the secret to a long life, 73% of them answered, “Breathing.”

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