Darren’s Daily Dose of Weird News

Britain’s National Health Service is using typists in India to transcribe information from doctors, and it’s getting lost in translation. A diagnosis of “phlebitis, left leg” was typed out as “flea bite his left leg.” “Eustachian tube malfunction” became “Euston station tube malfunction.” And “below knee amputation” became “baloney amputation.” A spokesman for a medical secretaries association said it seems funny, until they mistake 15 mg of your drug for 50 mg.  ***MARLAR: It’s hard enough reading a doctor’s handwriting when you DO know English.

In Australia officials at a maximum security prison were able to negotiate the release of a guard held hostage by delivering pizza to the rioting inmates.  ***MARLAR: But the joke was on the inmates. It wasn’t delivery. It was DiGiorno.

A new report says last year Americans commuting to work lost over 3 billion hours sitting in traffic delays.  ***MARLAR: What a waste… those are hours that could have been spent at work playing Solitaire or shopping on eBay.

A man in Virginia is claiming that a sponge was left in his shoulder following arthroscopic surgery.  Herman Koehler is suing for more than $75,000, alleging Faith Regional nurses neglected to remove a sponge from his left shoulder after surgery in June 2003.  Following surgery, Koehler had pain and an excessive amount of drainage in the area of the incision.  Koehler’s lawsuit contends that the infection and further damage to the shoulder has resulted in additional medical bills of about $45,000 and lost income of about $30,000.  ***MARLAR: He also complains about being thirsty all of the time.

According to a survey of historians, today is the best time in U.S. history in which to be alive.  ***MARLAR: Because if you were alive in the 1700s or 1800s, you’d be dead by now.

In an AIG Insurance poll, 66% of men said their wives were the people they’d most want to be with if they were stuck in a traffic jam.  ***MARLAR: Apparently, the poll was conducted among men who were stuck in traffic jams with their wives sitting right there beside them.  (Personally, I’d want to be in the car with Superman so he could fly us straight out of there!)

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