Darren’s Daily Dose of Weird News: January 11, 2011

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NEW NEWS…

The U.S. Centers for Disease Control and Prevention lost or misplaced more than $8 million in property in 2007, losing track of items including computer and video equipment, government auditors say.  ***MARLAR: How can we expect these people to find cures for cancer if they can’t even keep track of their own office supplies?

A Wisconsin man has won the Burlington Liars Club’s annual contest, earning bragging rights as the champion liar of 2010 with this line: “I almost had a psychic girlfriend but she left me before we met.”   David Milz, 49, came up with the one-liner over the summer when he was joking around with colleagues.

A Florida man says he’s going to spend the next month living in a fenced enclosure with two African lions.  James Jablon of Spring Hill hopes the stunt will raise money for his wildlife center, Wildlife Rehabilitation of Hernando.  Jablon entered the lions’ den over the weekend and he says he’s going to sleep on hay near the lions named Lea and Ed and eat when they eat.  He says he’s also going to build a place to sleep and hide in the trees in the enclosure, in case the lions fight with each other.  ***MARLAR: Dude, you do realize cats can climb trees… right?

Effective next year, Neenah High School will eliminate the requirement that all students must pass a swimming course for graduation.  Rather, freshmen will be required to pass an active lifestyles survey course that includes a unit on swimming. Failure of the swimming unit alone will not prevent graduation.  Neenah High School has required students to pass a swimming course to graduate since the early 1990s.  ***MARLAR: However, you are required to be able to outrun anyone at a mall with a clipboard wanting to ask you a few questions.

RETRO NEWS: FORMERLY NEW, NOW NOT NEW, BUT STILL ENTERTAINING…

In Sweden, a company is going to tap into the body heat generated by thousands of commuters to heat their building. With train commuters warming up the air of the terminal, the heat will be transferred over to a nearby building and help raise the temperature by a couple of degrees.  ***MARLAR: On the downside, you also get to smell the odors of thousands of train commuters.

A new trend popping up in places: the transparent purse with clear see-through sides so you know what’s in there.  ***MARLAR: So you can actually SEE the girlie stuff inside?  That’s NOT going to help men want to carry their wives’ purses.

More than two dozen young people have died worldwide over the past 10 years when sand holes collapsed on them at the beach.  ***MARLAR: And, of course, it’s all the fault of global warming and President Bush.

There’s a new kind of DWI, driving while intoxicated… intoxicated by your cell phone. People talking on their cells are almost completely oblivious to what goes on around them, according to a new study from Western Washington University. Researchers used a clown riding a unicycle past participants to test the awareness of nearly 350 pedestrians. When asked if they saw the clown, 71% of those walking with a friend remembered the clown, as did 61% of those listening to music. But shockingly, only 25% of the cell phone users remembered seeing a clown on a unicycle. “If people experience so much difficulty performing the task of walking when on a cell phone, just think of what this means when put into the context of driving safety,” says psychology professor Ira Hyman.  ***MARLAR: I’m not sure this is a fair analysis.  Couldn’t it be that we just see clowns on the road so often that we’re just desensitized to them?

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