Darren’s Daily Dose of Weird News – June 10, 2010

Alaska State Troopers are puzzled by a gruesome discovery in the city of North Pole: 26 headless chickens carefully arranged at a coop.  Police say the fly-infested carcasses found Monday were arranged in a 12- to 15-foot-long line pattern that ended in a circle. There was no sign of the missing heads.  Three chickens were left unharmed, and there was no damage to the coop.  Trooper spokeswoman Megan Peters says officers “have no idea what the thought process was.”  They say there’s a possibility that the killings were intended as a threat. Those responsible could be charged with felony criminal mischief.  The birds were unsuitable for eating, so investigators disposed of the chickens after photographing the scene.  ***MARLAR: At which point McDonald’s immediately stepped up and asked if they could have them.

Yankee Stadium has a policy that prohibits fans from bringing laptops inside, and iPads are now included in that ban. The team says it’s a security-and-safety issue.  Major League Baseball says the issue of allowing iPads into stadiums is a team-by-team decision. ***MARLAR: Apparently Apple was wrong when they said the iPad can go anywhere.

Axe Body Spray is being banned in some Minnesota schools! They say the man-spray has been abused and the aerosol stench is a hazard for students and faculty. There doesn’t seem to be any real evidence to link the use — or overuse — of Axe to allergy symptoms or headaches, but that hasn’t stopped the City of Minneapolis School District from trying to ban the stuff. State representative Karen Clark has even proposed a phasing out of all fragrances from public schools.  ***MARLAR: It’s not the allergic reactions that are dangerous – it’s the mental dangers of boys believing from the commercials that you’ll immediately be dogpiled by all the girls when using the stuff.

A judge is biting back, after a woman sued over an alleged police dog bite on the butt. Inez Starks sued the city of Warren, Mich., charging she suffered nerve damage after being bitten by a police dog about two years ago. The Macomb Daily newspaper reports neither police nor the city attorney found any evidence Starks was actually bitten. So, a judge put some teeth into his ruling that the suit was frivolous. He ordered Starks to pay a $500 fine.  ***MARLAR: So she bit him.

Sleepy, Sneezy, Bashful, Happy and Doc are now on the job at a Long Island, N.Y., park. They’re vegetation control specialists, better known as goats. The Town of Hempstead, N.Y., has put the Nigerian dwarf goats to work at the Norman J. Levy Park & Preserve. They’re the size of puppies now. But they’ll grow to about 50 pounds each, after eating plenty of weeds.  ***MARLAR: They also had a goat named Dopey, but he kept eating the parking meters.

We’ve all heard the old saying about how many of “them” it takes to change a light bulb, but who knew they had a school for that kind of thing? The Town Council of Doncaster, England, not only sent its janitorial staff to a half-day seminar on how to change a light bulb, but they were also trained in the proper use of a ladder. A school custodian who was forced to attend the training called it “comic” as an official demonstrated how to fit different sized bulbs into their corresponding sockets. The council rebuts that it takes health and safety of its workforce seriously and to prove it, 94 staff members have been trained how to change a light bulb so far. ***MARLAR: So, how many trained lightbulb changers does it take to change a stupid rule about changing lightbulbs?  None… they’re too busy training lightbulb changers to change the lightbulb changing rules.

Young people can expect to get carded at a Wisconsin hot spot. Not to buy a drink, but to go to the mall. Mayfield Mall southwest of Milwaukee is a popular place with local teens. But if they want to hang out they’ll have to show I-D. Mall officials are concerned rowdy teenagers might be driving away paying customers.  ***MARLAR: It’s a mall… 90% of your paying customers ARE teenagers!

St. Louis University suggests that frequent driving might raise the risk of skin cancer on body parts used while steering.  ***MARLAR: Which is why I always apply sun block to my hands, arms, and knees.

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