Darren’s Daily Dose of Weird News – June 15, 2010

A 32-year-old Pasco County man who called 911 to complain about his mother is facing criminal charges. According to a sheriff’s office arrest report, Charles Dennison told a deputy that his mother took his beer and he wanted her arrested. Dennison told the deputy that he would keep calling emergency responders if his mother wasn’t charged. He has been charged with making false 911 calls and was jailed on $150 bond.  ***MARLAR: If you’re so desperate for a beer that you’re willing to call 911 because your mother took your can, the next phone call you make should be to AA.

I just read that getting ten minutes of brisk exercise triggers metabolic changes that last at least an hour.  ***MARLAR: So I’ve been wasting my time on the treadmill, 30-minutes at a time?!?!

A hand-held laser pointer appears to be the cause of a fire at a Los Angeles high-rise that caused 200-thousand dollars in damage.  The laser device had been placed on an examination table in a dermatologist’s office on the 12th floor and then somehow ignited the surrounding furniture.  The fire was put out by the building’s sprinkler system, but firefighters had to mop up about three inches of water.  ***MARLAR: Those things are dangerous.  The warning label says, “Do not look into laser with remaining eye.”  Kind of assumes you’ve already ignored that warning once before, doesn’t it?

It’s a brewski to get your tail wagging. Dutch pet shop owner Terrie Berenden is brewing a beer for dogs. She says she got the idea after her annual hunting trip to Austria. She says the humans enjoy a brew after a day of hunting and felt the canines deserved a cold one, too, Now, her beer for dogs is on the market in the Netherlands. It’s advertised as “a beer for your best friend.”  ***MARLAR: So now he can get the same sensation without chasing his tail in circles.

University of Illinois architect Jeffery Poss is thinking small. His latest building is a meditation hut for his wife. It’s a simple yet elegant 54-square-foot structure in the corner of his Urbana, Illinois, yard. Poss uses some innovative design in the tiny building.  There’s a hidden cabinet under the floor for yoga mats and other supplies.  He’s even gotten an architectural award for his hut.  Barbara Poss tells the Champaign News-Gazette the hut reminds her of a child’s playhouse, with connotations of comfort and security.  ***MARLAR: I wouldn’t mind having a meditation hut – so long as it had Wi-Fi, cable TV, and a mini fridge.

Most Americans misquote Lincoln’s Gettysburg Address, believing for some reason that he said “Fourscore and seven years ago our forefathers brought forth…” He actually said “fathers,” not “forefathers.”  ***MARLAR: What a relief! Through all my childhood years it had me so confused. Who the heck has four fathers?

Sunday is Father’s Day.  ***MARLAR: And fathers everywhere will hear those words they hear every year, “Will you accept the charges?”

For the first time, lifeguards in Sydney, Australia, will be allowed to fine swimmers who disobey orders and do things like swim outside designated safe surfing sections on beaches. ***MARLAR: The fines range from $32 for swimming outside the flagged areas to $118 for singing Beach Boys songs without a clear understanding of four-part harmony.

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