Darren’s Daily Dose of Weird News – June 22, 2010

A man who smuggled Asian songbirds into the country by hiding them under his pants during a flight from Vietnam to Los Angeles was sentenced Monday to four months in prison.  ***MARLAR: He’s a jailbird now because a little birdie told the police.

A Washington state business is offering a $1,000 reward to catch a thief who took a doormat. The owners of Advanced Metal Technologies in Spokane are angry at the ripoff and want to catch the man.  Surveillance video shows that the thief drove up about 8:30 p.m. Sunday, looked in the window and then grabbed the doormat.  ***MARLAR: A thousand dollar reward, for a doormat?  You could buy another doormat for twenty bucks and still have 49 others as backups.

Be careful when you try to heat up your chicken from KFC. In at least two cases, take-out containers for KFC’s popcorn chicken caught fire when microwaved. It has something to do with the box manufacturer changing the ink on the box, which doesn’t react well with microwaves.  ***MARLAR: And be extra careful when you ask for extra crispy.

You will soon be able to buy a pet-friendly car with a cushioned dog bed in the trunk, fitted with a built-in water bowl and fan and a ramp to help less agile dogs climb in. With the help of a rescue dog named Sammy, Japanese car maker Honda Motor Co unveiled the pet friendly version of its Element utility vehicle at the New York Auto Show.  ***MARLAR: For a little extra, in the back of the passenger area you can get the optional fire-hydrant installed.

The Sun tabloid reports that Oakwood Technology College in South Yorks, England, ordered students to design a politically-correct pizza that wouldn’t offend anyone. One-fifth of the pupils are Muslim, but the toppings not only couldn’t include pork, but also not offend any religious group, vegetarian or person with allergies. The headmaster said they were teaching students to understand all viewpoints. But the Sun responded by creating the most un-PC pizza ever, which they topped with cheese, nuts, calves’ liver, foie gras and whale bacon. ***MARLAR: Wouldn’t calves’ livers offend everyone?

Donna Maddock, 22, of Mold, Wales, found her picture flashed all over the world when a police video camera caught her driving on the A499 highway while putting on her makeup. She was going 32 mph with a brush in one hand, a compact in the other, and no hands on the wheel. She was fined $350 (US). A police spokesman said, “A car is a dangerous lump of metal in the wrong hands.” ***MARLAR: On the upside, she has the best looking mugshot in England.

Is your dog smarter than a fifth grader? While border collies and poodles are believed to be the most intelligent dogs and basenjis and Afghan hounds the least intelligent, now you can find out just how smart your dog is. A new Pooch IQ Test claims it can “find out if your pooch is a brainiac or a dunce with 15 simple exercises.” Stacy Stubblefield is the co-creator of the IQ test and says the rankings are based on how long a dog takes to learn a trick and obey commands. Once you do all 15 exercises you add up the score. Your best friend will be ranked anywhere from dazed and confused; not so bright; slightly dense; about average; pretty clever; smarty pants, top of the class; to absolute genius. You and your dog can take the test at PoochIQ.com and owners can upload photos of their pooches along with a score at BrightPup.com. ***MARLAR: Or, if your dog is at the genius level, it can upload the photos itself.

Police in Haifa, Israel, are searching for a thief who broke into a factory and stole nearly 100 tons of chocolate spread. They suspect it was an inside job, since the alarm was deactivated, and the surveillance video was taken. The missing chocolate was enough to fill five large trucks.  ***MARLAR: Of course it’s missing… they probably ate it!  (I would’ve.)

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