Darren’s Daily Dose of Weird News: March 14, 2011

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NEW NEWS…

University professors have apologized to students after handing out exam papers with the answers stapled to the back.  The geology exam at Manchester University in Great Britain descended into chaos when the error was spotted by a student.  Profs dashed around the hall ripping out the answers from all papers – asking the 50 undergraduates to finish the exam.  The results would have counted towards the final degree mark. But bosses have declared the exam void and students will be asked to retake the test.  ***MARLAR: So, in fact, they’re not really apologizing for giving students the answers – they’re apologizing for making them take the test over again.  That makes a lot more sense.

A church in Brazil is trying to crack down on tardy brides by fining them $300 for showing up late to their own weddings.  It’s a common tradition in the South American nation for brides to arrive at least 10 minutes tardy. And it’s not unusual to be an hour late — or worse.  The Nossa Senhora de Lourdes Cathedral in the small southern city of Apucarana is tired of wedding delays disrupting scheduled Masses and other ceremonies.  Couples are required to leave a $300 check as deposit.  They can only get it back if they’re on time.  ***MARLAR: Actually, I think the groom waiting on the bride like this is a good idea – it just gets him used to the idea of always being ready to leave the house before she is for the rest of their marriage.

Someone at the University of Minnesota has invented something worthy of the Nobel Prize or, more importantly, your money: The Toepener. The what? Simple: It’s a pedal that lets people open public bathroom doors without touching the handle by simply stepping on a pedal. Cost is $50.  ***MARLAR: Or, a better idea… just wash your hands before you leave the bathroom.  Problem solved.

Madison police arrested a 35-year-old woman for allegedly driving a vanload of teens to a home to fight other teens.  She faces a charge of contributing to the delinquency of a child. It was the second time in 10 days that the woman was accused of driving teens to the home for a fight.  ***MARLAR: Although you can’t really blame the mother here.  It sounds like someone else just doesn’t understand the first rule of Fight Club.

RETRO NEWS: FORMERLY NEW, NOW NOT NEW, BUT STILL ENTERTAINING…

The head of the U.N. mission in Afghanistan said recently that it’s “high time” a political solution is found with the Taliban to resolve the more than 9-year-old conflict. “It’s time to talk,” they said. ***MARLAR: Wait a minute… no one has spoken to the Taliban in nine years?  Well no WONDER they’re ticked.

Authorities say they have arrested 33-year-old Tanya Nareau of Mesa,Arizona who traded her 2-year-old daughter for a gun.  Deputies say they spoke with a family friend who had the child and confirmed Nareau gave the girl to him for gun.  Deputies say Nareau felt the friend would do a better job raising the child than she would.  ***MARLAR: Plus she was teaching her daughter the importance of sharing.

Police in San Jose, California say a car dealer who repossessed a woman’s Honda Accord left with something a bit more valuable: her 2-year-old son.  The woman’s child was sleeping in the back of the car when it was taken away by an employee of Alberto’s Auto Sales because the boy’s mother was behind on her payments.  Officers located the toddler a half-hour later – about the same time the driver told authorities that he discovered the boy.  Sgt. Ronnie Lopez says kidnapping charges don’t appear to be warranted. But he says the mother should have checked the car thoroughly.  ***MARLAR: In other news, Alberto’s Auto Sales has announced their new “curbside babysitting service”.

If your toothbrush fell in the toilet, would you throw it away or rinse it off and continue using it? Well, get this, 9% of men said they would fish the toothbrush out of the toilet and use it again, according to a survey by dental products manufacturer Philips Sonicare. In addition, almost half of all adults said that if their toothbrush fell on the floor, they would use it again — even though they acknowledged that their bathroom floor is the dirtiest floor in the house.  ***MARLAR: That all sounds gross, but if you think about it isn’t toothpaste nothing more than soap in a tube for your teeth?  If so, you’re washing it every time you use your toothbrush anywhere – regardless of where it was eight seconds earlier.

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