Darren’s Daily Dose of Weird News – March 12, 2010

An Ohio woman taken to a maternity ward in her wedding dress became a newlywed and a new mom on the same day.  Jamie Phillips says she felt contractions while her father walked her down the aisle during her wedding ceremony Saturday in Toledo in northwest Ohio, but she thought it was a false alarm. It wasn’t until after her water broke at the reception that she was rushed to a hospital in Sylvania.  ***MARLAR: They cut this so close that when the groom tossed the garter behind him to the single men in the room he accidentally threw the baby’s umbilical cord.

All over town ran a lone goat as Odessa police and animal control officers tried to catch the roaming animal. The report to police came in Saturday as a sheep on the loose. Officers then determined it was a goat loping through a Taco Bell parking lot, a park and the dorm area at the University of Texas-Permian Basin.  ***MARLAR: Or possibly a Dodge Ram truck.

It’s a really, really big zucchini in the Big Apple. A New York City woman managed to grow a 6-foot-long zucchini in her back yard. Apollonia (ap-poh-LOH’-nee-a) Castitlione (cah-STEET’-lee-yoh-na) says she’s had a vegetable garden for 26 years in her Queens yard. But she’s never seen anything like her monster veggie. The zucchini is of the Long Italian variety. She says the seeds came from friends. She just added water, fertilizer and her own green thumb.  ***MARLAR: Add some wheels to that thing and you could have a zamboni!

Akron, Ohio, Mayor Don Plusquellic wants to lease the city’s sewers to a private contractor and use the money for college scholarships. Some people are calling the plan “stools for schools.” The proposal would fund college scholarships for Akron’s public high school graduates. But city sewage workers aren’t fond of the idea.  A vote on the issue comes in November.  ***MARLAR: Wow – talk about our educational system being flushed down the toilet!

When U.S. companies market their products in Africa, it is common practice to have a picture on the label of what is inside, since most people there cannot read English. Gerber Baby Food was not aware of this though, and ran into a problem, since the photo on their label is of a cute Caucasian baby. (Yikes!)

Genetically engineered mice have produced a malaria vaccine in their milk that worked to protect monkeys from the disease.  ***MARLAR: So if your monkey comes down with malaria, convince it to take mouse milk.

Looking for a wakeup buzz?  Try a soap called Shower Shock that delivers two cups of coffee’s worth of caffeine per shower.  ***MARLAR: The hard part is feeling clean after you add cream and sugar.

When christening a ship, instead of using champagne, the Vikings would sacrifice a human being.  ***MARLAR: The custom started when some Vikings tried to break a bottle of champagne against the side of a vessel and the ship’s builder said, “Over my dead body!”

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