Darren’s Daily Dose of Weird News – October 08, 2010

It looks like last year was a bad year for men’s underwear. The sales of men’s skivvies dropped about two percent from the year before. Meanwhile. Nobody knows for sure why sales are down but it could be because buying underwear is not top of mind with most men and with a bad economy, underwear is way down on the list.  ***MARLAR: Especially when you have the option of wearing two or three old pairs of underwear to make one good pair.  Take THAT you stinkin’ economy!

Prosecutors in Washington state say an 18-year-old woman stabbed a 19-year-old man for teasing her that her feet smelled.  The trouble started when Dallas Amber Smith was drinking and hanging out with friends and was challenged to do a back flip. When she took off her shoes to do the back flip, the teasing started, at which point she stabbed the victim.  Ms. Smith faces charges of second-degree assault with a deadly weapon.  ***MARLAR: She’s probably in trouble for the stabbing too.

Schools in one region of Scotland are lifting the Internet filters on their school computers so students will be able to access sexually explicit websites if they choose, according to a new report from the Christian Institute.  ***MARLAR: I understand the need to cut spending at the schools, but do we have to start with SexEd?

A German company that fired a man for the theft of two cents worth of electricity had no grounds for sacking him, a court ruled, dismissing the firm’s appeal against his reinstatement.  Network administrator Oliver Beel lost his job after charging his Segway, a two-wheeled electric vehicle, at work in May 2009. After he connected the vehicle to the firm’s power source for 1-1/2 hours, his boss asked him to remove it.  Twelve days later Beel found himself without a job.  The court ruled that dismissal was disproportionate to the offence, especially given the “minimal electricity cost involved, the plaintiff’s 19-year employment by the company and the fact other employees charged mobile phones and digital photo frames at the firm’s expense without punishment.”  ***MARLAR: So now he’s recharging his Segue through his boss’ iPad.

According to a recent study, men have to work harder deciphering what women are saying because they use the auditory part of the brain that processes music, not human voices. It’s not the pitch of the woman’s voice, but rather the vibration and number of sound waves that cause the problem.  ***MARLAR: At least I think that’s what my wife told me… I wasn’t really listening.

A Detroit man who began robbing banks to fix his mother’s plumbing has been sentenced to just two years in prison, a significant break. U.S. District Judge Bernard Friedman says Jimmie Lee Fortune was an “outstanding citizen” before he turned to robbery last year. The 29-year-old Fortune pleaded guilty in March to stealing nearly $14,000 from five banks in suburban Detroit. Prosecutors agreed not to charge him with three more. Fortune’s sentencing range was approximately five years to six years in prison. But the guidelines are not mandatory, and the judge settled on two years.  ***MARLAR: While in prison he plans to learn job skills like plumbing.

Shutting the window on a stick-up. That’s what police in Colorado Springs report happened at a McDonald’s drive-through lane. Authorities say two men ordered a drink and then as they drove up to the window to pick up their order, police say two other men walked up to the window, pulled a gun and demanded cash. But when the McDonald’s worker simply closed the window, all the men left. Authorities say they’re not sure if the men in the car were part of the robbery attempt. Police are still looking for suspects.  ***MARLAR: That really says something about your robbery skills when you’re more inept than the Hamburglar.

Jerry Lowery may need glasses — to read the fine print on his criminal charges. He’s accused of stealing more than $45,000 worth of eyeglasses from suburban Milwaukee stores.  Why? Well, the criminal complaint quotes Lowery as saying he “really likes to be around glasses.” Investigators say Lowery told them he tries on the glasses in front of a mirror, then tosses them out. Prosecutors accuse him of taking more than 500 high-end pairs of specs like Prada and Gucci brands. Lowery now faces a number of serious charges, including multiple counts of armed robbery.  ***MARLAR: Can’t you walk into any eyeglasses store and just try on every pair anyway?

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