February 10, 2016: Wednesday ONAIRprep

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PRINTER FRIENDLY VERSION: 20160210

 

 

WELCOME TO THE SHOW!

Portions of (THE JOCK SHOW) will be presented in their entirety. Other portions, though not presented in their entirety, will not be abridged or shortened in any way.

 

Nothing says “I love you” quite like saturated fat and dying flowers.  (Valentine’s Day is four days away!)

 

 

BIBLE VERSE OF THE DAY

I tell you, whoever acknowledges me before men, the Son of Man will also acknowledge him before the angels of God. But he who disowns me before men will be disowned before the angels of God. –Luke 12:8-9

 

Sitting down, Jesus called the Twelve and said, “If anyone wants to be first, he must be the very last, and the servant of all.” — Mark 9:35

 

Because your love is better than life, my lips will glorify you. — Psalm 63:3

 

 

HEARTLIGHT DAILY VERSE, PRAYER & THOUGHT

(From VerseOfTheDay.com)

The grace of the Lord Jesus Christ be with your spirit. — Philemon 1:25

 

Thought: Have you noticed how words of blessing are in such short supply? There is something about our fallen state that makes sarcasm and ridicule easier to use than blessing. But, in God’s family, words are always to be used for the benefit and blessing of others. What simpler or kinder words do we need to use to bless others than these words Paul sent to Philemon? Let’s find a way to say them every day.

 

Prayer: Loving Father, you have blessed me so much with your grace. Please use me to be a blessing to everyone I meet today. In Jesus’ name I pray. Amen.

 

The Thoughts and Prayers for Today’s Verse are written by Phil Ware. You can email questions or comments to phil@heartlight.org.

 

 

BIRTHDAY VERSE” OF THE DAY

The chapter and verse corresponds to the month and the day!

1 Corinthians 2:9 NIV = However, as it is written: No eye has seen, no ear has heard, no mind has conceived what God has prepared for those who love him

 

 

TODAY IS WEDNESDAY – FEBRUARY 10, 2016

(NOTE: Some holidays may be duplicated due to various calendars reporting conflicting dates)
WEIRD, WACKY, STRANGE, ZANY, ODD, BIZARRE, QUIRKY, UNUSUAL HOLIDAYS!
THERE ARE ONLY 319 SHOPPING DAYS UNTIL CHRISTMAS.   

 

This is NATIONAL CREAM CHEESE BROWNIE DAY.

 

Today is NATIONAL UMBRELLA DAY.

 

Today is TRY TO INVENT A NEW JELL-O FLAVOR DAY. *** I will say from personal experience that tuna-flavored Jell-O doesn’t turn out all that well.

 

Today is BEGIN COMPOSING AN ORIGINAL POEM FOR YOUR VALENTINE DAY.  ***Studies have show that for Valentine’s Day, women appreciate most hand-written original poems from their men. Here’s something to get you started, guys…
Roses are cars,
Violets are buckets.
This poem makes no sense,
Cumquats.

 

 

TODAY IS ALSO. . .

Plimsoll Day

All The News That’s Fit To Print Day

 

 

COMING UP NEXT

THURSDAY, FEBRUARY 11

Be Electrific Day

Don’t Cry Over Spilled Milk Day

Get Out Your Guitar Day

Make a Friend Day

Pro Sports Wives Day

National Shut-In Visitation Day

Satisfied Staying Single Day

White Shirt Day (White T-shirt Day)

World Day of the Sick

 

FRIDAY, FEBRUARY 12

Lincoln’s Birthday

Oglethorpe Day

Paul Bunyan Day (Born Feb 12, 1834 in Bangor, ME)

Safety Pup Day

 

SATURDAY, FEBRUARY 13

Desperation Day

Employee Legal Awareness Day

Galentine’s Day

Get a Different Name Day

Madly In Love With me Day

World Radio Day

World Whale Day

 

SUNDAY, FEBRUARY 14

Autism Day

Batman Sticker Day

Ferris Wheel Day

International Book Giving Day

Frederick Douglass Day

Pet Theft Awareness Day (***If it requires a special day set aside to make you aware your pet has been stolen, you don’t deserve to have a pet at all.)

Library Lovers Day (***People without dates on Valentine’s Day apparently need somewhere to hide so they won’t be seen.  What better place than a library?)

National Have a heart Day

Congenital Heart Defect Awareness Day

League of Women Voters Day

National Women’s Heart Day

Race Relations Day

Singles Awareness Day (Singles Appreciation Day)

National Donor Day

Quirky Alone Day

Valentine’s Day

World Marriage Day

 

MONDAY, FEBRUARY 15

Clean Out Your Computer Day

Angelman Syndrome Day

Grammy Awards

Lupercalia

National Gum Drop Day

National Hippo Day

Presidents Day

Remember the Maine Day

Susan B. Anthony Day

 

TUESDAY, FEBRUARY 16

Kyoto Protocol Day

National Almond Day

 

WEDNESDAY, FEBRUARY 17

Champion Crab Races Day

My Way Day

National PTA Founders Day

World Human Spirit Day

 

 

ON THIS DAY

60 AD: The Apostle Paul was shipwrecked near the island of Malta.

 

1897: The phrase “All the news that’s fit to print” first appeared on the front page of the New York Times. It had first appeared on the editorial page on October 25, 1896.

 

1933: The Postal Telegraph Company of New York City delivered history’s first “singing” telegram.

 

1940: “In the Mood” by the Glenn Miller Orchestra hit #1 on Billboard’s pop music chart.

 

1942: History’s first gold record was awarded to the Glenn Miller Orchestra for “Chattanooga Choo Choo.” RCA presented a gold-sprayed master disc to Miller during a radio broadcast.

 

1949: “Jumping Joe” Fulks of the Philadelphia Warriors introduced the jump shot, scoring a then-NBA record 63 points against the Indianapolis Jets. The record stood for a decade until Elgin Baylor scored 64 on November 8, 1959.

 

1957: The Styrofoam cooler was invented.

 

1987: At the Maritime Aquarium in Gothenburg, Sweden, 65-year-old Smiley became the oldest alligator ever to freeze to death when someone apparently turned off the electricity heating her pool.

 

1993: With 90-million Americans watching, Michael Jackson told Oprah Winfrey his light skin was caused by a disorder called Vitiligo. He admitted he had had “minor” plastic surgery on his nose.

 

1998: A study at Detroit’s Henry Ford Hospital revealed evidence that men’s brains shrink faster with age than women’s brains. The study concluded that, between the ages of 65 and 95, men’s brains shrink faster in areas that control thinking, planning, and memory.

 

1999: Ruperta Hernandez of San Antonio became the oldest person ever to take the oath of U.S. citizenship. The 107-year-old Mexican-born mother of 11 had lived in Texas since 1915.

 

2002: A student with just 50 hours of flying lessons landed a ten-seat plane in the dark with no landing gear. A passenger aboard the Cape Air flight from Martha’s Vinyard to Hyannis, Massachusetts,  24-year-old Melanie Oswalt took the controls after the pilot passed out. She could not contact ground staff over the radio and her mobile phone was dead. Ms. Oswalt landed the plane safely on Provincetown airport’s 3,000 foot runway. She had never flown anything as complicated as the Cessna 402 and had never flown alone.

 

2004: Democrat John Kerry won the Virginia and Tennessee presidential primaries.

 

2005: Prince Charles announced he would marry his divorced lover, Camilla Parker Bowles, in April.

 

2007: In Fairfax, Virginia, 60,000 eggs were smashed on a highway when an 18-wheeler overturned. Freezing weather prevented a rancid smell on the beltway encircling the nation’s capital. The unidentified driver fled the scene rather than explain the mess.

 

 

TODAY IN CHRISTIAN HISTORY

60: The Apostle Paul is shipwrecked at Malta.

 

1535: A dozen Anabaptists run stark naked through the streets of Amsterdam. Such strange actions, usually by Melchoirite Anabaptists, led to the group’s ridicule by Protestants and Catholics alike. Former Catholic priest Menno Simons (1496-1561) was finally able to bring the group into a nonresistant, discipled, and disciplined vision.

 

1751: John Wesley suffers a fall on the ice-covered London Bridge and is carried to the home of Mary Vazeille, a sailor’s widow. Within a week, the two were married; with disastrous results. The unhappy couple spent so little time together that, in 1771, Wesley recorded this in his journal: “I came to London and was informed that my wife died on Monday. This evening she was buried, though I was not informed of it.”

 

 

HOLLYWOOD, SPORTS AND CELEBRITY FIGURE BIRTHDAYS

  • journalist George Stephanopolous 55
  • actor (“Hart To Hart”) Robert Wagner is 86 (audio clip)

 

 

BEE-BOP BIRTHDAYS

(Music Artist Birthdays From SongFacts.com)

1914 : Larry Adler

1929 : Jerry Goldsmith

1937 : Don Wilson (The Ventures)

1939 : Roberta Flack

1940 : Jimmy Merchant (Frankie Lymon and the Teenagers)

1943 : Ral Donner

1949 : Nigel Olsson (Elton John Band)

1959 : Lionel Cartwright

1961 : Robbie Neville

 

 

SECRETS OF THE UNIVERSE

Why do we call that guy with the badge, the “Sheriff?”

Sheriff came from Shire Reeve. During early years of feudal rule in England, each shire had a reeve who was the law for that shire. When the term was brought to the United States it was shortened to Sheriff.

 

 

CHRISTIAN ARTIST NEWS

Do you like the Christian Artist News you see below? It’s just a tiny sample of the 5-6 pages of material you could be receive every weekday… and it’s FREE!  Become one of their subscribers at ChristianRadioShowPrepServices.com!

 

Audio Adrenaline’s Adam Agee had a great time with his grand parents in Tulsa over the weekend. A few other people showed up as well. Audio Adrenaline is part of the Rock and Worship Road Show and Adam’s grandparents were joined by several thousand additional fans at the show.

 

David Blascoe is putting in some overtime. David is the drummer for Citizenway. Right now the band is part of the Rock and Worship Roadshow and David is also playing drums for Danny Gokey.

https://www.instagram.com/p/BBd-Oq-pANV/

 

Dan Bremnes was thankful for things like showers over the weekend. Dan was taking advantage of the shower facilities offered by Air Canada at the air port and said he was thankful that it was available. He said it might be the only shower he gets all week.

 

Plumb took a break from the Beautiful Offerings Tour over the weekend to visit the restaurant of a friend in Santa Ana. She said her friend owns the restaurant and is treated them to lunch. Plumb said the meal included Sautéed Brussels Sprouts in sweet chili sauce topped with cilantro and bacon. Sounds interesting!

https://www.instagram.com/p/BBdQ6UyEoV5/

 

Jeremy Camp will join with Mandisa and Finding Favour for the I Will Follow tour later this spring. The tour will run for two weeks from late April through early May.

 

Steven Curtis Chapman is partnering with some big names in Christian music over the next several months. Throughout February Steven will join with Amy Grant to promote Show Hope, the adoption organization started by Steven and his wife Mary Beth. And late last week Steven announced that tickets are now available for his appearances with Third Day. He will join Mac Powell and the rest of the band in April and May.

 

Michael W Smith was back on the Grand Ole Opry stage over the weekend. Michael presented songs from his new album Hymns 2 on the famed stage.

 

Natalie Grant was celebrating a milestone over the weekend. She shared a picture of her parents and her daughters as she and her family celebrated her parents’ 58th anniversary. Natalie posted: Happy 58th anniversary to my mom and dad! Such consistent commitment to Christ & each other. So grateful. http://twitter.com/NatalieGrant/status/696354043464011776/photo/1

 

 

NEWS KICKERS

(No news on the weekends.  Audio clips are only valid for a few days before being removed from our servers.)

 

NEW NEWS KICKERS…

An official in the Scottish town of South Lanarkshire who oversaw the closure of public toilets has been caught urinating in public. Jackie Burns, who announced funding cuts for public bathrooms, was fined after police spotted him relieving himself outdoors.  *** Obviously just showing how we’ll all survive just fine without port-a-potties.

 

At his sentencing on attempted murder charges, a Tennessee man apologized for to his wife for trying to kill her three times.  *** “I’m sorry, Margaret… that I didn’t get it right the first time!”

 

Calum Neff won the Katy Half Marathon in Texas Saturday which is believed to be a world record for running a half marathon while pushing a stroller. Neff pushed his almost 1-year-old daughter Holland during the entire 1 hour, 11 minute, 27 second run.  ***He said it was an exhilarating experience except for when his daughter kept screaming, calling him a backseat driver.

 

A new type of smart yoga pants has been developed that make a sound when the wearer uses the correct form for a pose.  *** Incorrect poses get an electric shock.

 

 

NEWS KICKER EVERGREENS…

A scientist in Transylvania has come up with a new artificial blood. ***Apparently, Dracula was looking for something a little less filling.

 

According to research, our brains get rid of their waste while we sleep.  ***In a related story, a majority of Congress suffers from insomnia.

 

What’s an extra inch in height worth? A study found it could mean up to $800 a year in extra income. Researchers found that tall people tend to earn more money and win more respect at work. They found a height advantage even in jobs where being tall isn’t a qualification — in other words, they didn’t just look at pro basketball players. Some good news for the non-tall: the researchers also said being short doesn’t appear to be a prohibitive disadvantage. Hard work, motivation and intelligence help bridge the gap.  ***MARLAR: Taller means more money.  This is exactly why I’m growing my hair longer so I can have a beehive hairdo.

 

After more than a decade as the world’s favorite car color, silver is falling in popularity. PPG Industries, the leading supplier of automotive paints, says 25 percent of the vehicles last year were white, up 3 percent from the year before. Silver and black tied for second, with 18 percent each. White dominates in Europe, North America and Asia. Only in South America is silver still king.  ***MARLAR: White is also at the top in South Africa, but that’s just because they’re racist.

 

 

WONDER WOMAN

CLICK HERE TO DOWNLOAD TODAY’S EPISODE… “George Washington, I.D.”

 

 

DAILY COMEDY CLIP

CLICK HERE TO DOWNLOAD TODAY’S EPISODE… Ken Davis, “Spiders”

 

 

AS THE JUNGLE TURNS – WEEKDAY VERSION

CLICK HERE TO DOWNLOAD WEDNESDAY’S EPISODE  
OPEN: And now, FancyMonkey.com, (Show Name), and (Station Call Letters) bring you As the Jungle Turns!

When last we left the jungle, Racquet the Skunk was making his own badminton racquets… and when Gruffy Bear saw them, and tried one out, he insisted that Racquet make a special badminton racquet just for him… and has agreed to give Racquet one of his new blue handled hammers for it.

 

CLOSE: I have a sneaking suspicion Racquet is about to get two new orders for badminton racquets… you think?  Boy, these jungle animals sure take the game of badminton seriously.  Tune in next time for more of our story… As the Jungle Turns!

 

 

AS THE JUNGLE TURNS – SATURDAY/SUNDAY VERSION

CLICK HERE TO DOWNLOAD THE EPISODE FOR THE WEEKEND OF FEBRUARY 13/14

 

OPEN: And now, FancyMonkey.com, (Show Name), and (Station Call Letters) bring you As the Jungle Turns!  When last we left the jungle, Louis the lion – currently the king of the jungle – decided he didn’t want to be king.  So all of the animals went out searching all throughout the jungle to find a replacement king… someone to be king so Louis wouldn’t have to.  And it looks like they’re getting pretty close!
CLOSE: Being king of the jungle is an awful big responsibility… and it looks like it requires an awful big crown too!  But the crown doesn’t fit Louis, so there must be someone else around that can be king!  We’ll find out who next time, As the Jungle Turns!
***You may simulcast “As the Jungle Turns” on the Internet stream of your live broadcast only. Any other Internet use of “As the Jungle Turns” in whole or part including podcasting of your live broadcast is a violation of copyright law. Thank you for your cooperation on this vitally important issue. If you have any questions, please e-mail us and ask about “Jungle Jam & Friends the Radio Show” usage.

 

 

MOMENT OF DUH

You get what you pay for… and that even includes veterinarian medicine.

New York police were able to bust 28-year-old student Steven Vassall on charges of treating pets without a license with the help of two undercover officers. They would be Fred, the kitten and Burt, the Boston terrier. The investigation began after Burt’s owner, Raymond Reid, contacted authorities after his dog survived a botched operation. Reid said that in hindsight he should have been suspicious of a veterinarian who only made house calls and treated pets at an undisclosed location.

 

 

TOP TEN

TOP TEN MOST IRRITATING THINGS

  1. You have to try on a pair of sunglasses with that little plastic thing in the middle of them.
  2. The person behind you in the supermarket runs his cart into the back of your ankle.
  3. The elevator stops on every floor and nobody gets on.
  4. There’s always a car riding your tail when you’re slowing down to find an address.
  5. You open a can of soup and the lid falls in.
  6. It’s bad enough that you step in dog poo, but you don’t realize it till you walk across your living room rug.
  7. The tiny red string on the Band-Aid wrapper never works for you.
  8. There’s a dog in the neighborhood that barks at EVERYTHING.
  9. You can never put anything back in a box the way it came.
  10. Three hours and three meetings after lunch you look in the mirror and discover a piece of parsley stuck to your front tooth.

 

 

THE FILES OF LAW & DISORDER

Want to know a reason not to call 911? It’s to find out the name of that “cutie-pie” sheriff’s deputy you saw so you can ask him for a date.

 

FILE #1: This is probably one of my favorite Files of Law & Disorder stories of all time.  It took place in 2006.  It seems Lorna Jeanne Dudash of Aloha, Oregon, became smitten with the deputy who came to her door to respond to a noise complaint by her neighbors. When they left, Lorna dialed 911 in a desperate attempt to get the deputy’s name. She said, “He’s the cutest cop I’ve seen in a long time. I just want to know his name. I don’t have an emergency but throw him back my way, would you?” She did succeed in getting the officer to come back to her door – but only to arrest her.  Lorna could face a fine of several thousand dollars – and a year in jail.

 

FILE #2: A Canadian thief was getting ready to steal a car, when it wouldn’t start, so he asked a plain-clothes policeman to help him start the car he was trying to steal. The teenager actually had the hood of the 1997 Chevy Blazer up and was looking for help when the officer passed by. Not realizing he was a cop, the teen asked him if he would help him “start his car”. The policeman offered him a hand before realizing the car was stolen. After figuring it out, Sergeant Hudson quickly arrested the 16 year old boy and charged him with possessing stolen goods.

 

FILE #3: Zach Williams, 18, was robbed in Chattanooga, Tenn. He tried to run away and was shot down. One of the things the robbers stole: his pager. Police, upon learning about the beeper, figured “why not?” and sent it a page. When the robbers returned the cops’ call, it was traced to George Morgan, 19, and his cousin Antonio Morgan, 18, who were arrested.

 

STRANGE LAW: In Morrisville, PA, women must have a permit to wear cosmetics.

 

 

THIS IS YOUR BRAIN ON DRUGS

It pays to be observant of your surroundings (and your customers) – especially if you’re doing something illegal!

Orlando’s Michael Garibay approached Ed Johnson’s car at a Mobil gas station and asked if he wanted to buy some cocaine. As luck would have it, Ed said he was interested and Garibay pulled out a plastic bag containing “several pieces of flat white rocks substances” and asked for cash. Michael overlooked just one little detail. He was dealing with Deputy Ed Johnson, who was in uniform and sitting in his marked patrol car at the time. Michael is now sitting in a marked jail cell.

 

 

PHONER PHUN

What was the most romantic thing your spouse ever did for you (after you were married)?

 

 

BIBLE BRAIN BUSTER!

QUESTION: In John’s Gospel, Jesus’ first miracle is turning water into wine. What is the second miracle?

ANSWER: Healing an official’s son in Cana (John 4:43-54)

 

 

QUESTION IMPOSSIBLE

QUESTION: Most boat owners name their boats. What is the most popular?
ANSWER: Obsession

 

 

TRUE OR FALSE

Pay attention!  If our next player doesn’t answer all ten T/F questions correctly we start all over from question #1!  First person to answer question #10 correctly is our winner!

 

  1. Before Popeye, Olive Oyl had a boyfriend named Bluto. (False – before Popeye it was Ham Gravy.)

 

  1. In the U.S., more people are killed by dogs each year than any other animal. (False – deer.)

 

  1. The three cities with the highest percentage of counterfeit bills are Los Angeles, New York and Miami. (True)

 

  1. A group of rattlesnakes is called a “rhumba.” (True)

 

  1. The Space Station is the most expensive single object ever built. (True – the contribution made by the United States has been estimated at $96 billion.)

 

  1. Sean Connery once worked as a coffin-polisher. (True)

 

  1. Pepsi is Africa’s largest private-sector employer. (False, it’s Coca-Cola)

 

  1. Alexander Graham Bell invented the metal detector in 1881. (True)

 

  1. Technically, the banana is a nut. (False, it’s technically a berry.)

 

  1. A single edition of the Sunday New York Times contains more information than a typical adult in 1892 was exposed to in their entire life. (True)

 

 

TABLOID MATCH GAME

You have to match the blank in the tabloid headline with the word or phrase that has been removed!

SCIENTISTS PREDICT COMING ________ AGE! (ICE)

According to the world’s top scientists the world hasn’t warmed in 19 years and we are headed for a new ice age!

Statistics and data suggest we are headed for a new ice age to rival the 70-year temperature drop that saw frost fairs held on the Thames in the 17th Century.

Based on readings from more than 30,000 measuring stations, the data was issued last week without fanfare by the Met Office and the University of East Anglia Climatic Research Unit. It confirms that the rising trend in world temperatures ended in 1997.

 

 

THE WAY TOO EARLY IN THE MORNING TO UNDERSTAND THE PUNCHLINE EVEN AFTER TWO CUPS OF COFFEE JOKE OF THE DAY

JOKE #1 (

)

A teenager who had just received her learner’s permit offered to drive her parents to church. After a hair-raising ride, they finally reached their destination.

The mother got out of the car and said, “Thank you!”

“Anytime,” her daughter replied.

As the woman slammed the door, she said, “I wasn’t talking to you. I was talking to God.”

 

JOKE #2

Jack was first up in his foursome.  Eyeing the ball, he swung his club and hooked his shot over the fence and down a road where the ball crashed through the windshield of an oncoming car.  The startled driver lost control of his vehicle, and it spun into a parking lot and bounced off three cars.

Jack raced over to the crash scene and was relieved to find that no one was hurt. Almost immediately, a policeman arrived and approached Jack, who was standing next to the crashed car, eyeing his ball.  “Just what are you going to do about this?” demanded the policeman.

Jack looked up and said, “Well, the first thing I’m going to do is change my grip.”

 

JOKE #3

A man put his fifty cents in a vending machine and then watched helplessly as the cup failed to appear and a nozzle sent coffee down the drain while another poured cream after it.

”Now that’s automation!” he exclaimed. “It even drinks for you!”

 

 

USELESS FACTS

Health officials in China estimate that 60 million Chinese are obese.  ***MARLAR: Of course they are.  After they’re done eating they’re hungry again just an hour later.  (audio clip)

 

Northampton College in England has created a course to teach people how to make a living using eBay.  ***MARLAR: And it doubles as a theology degree if you auction a grilled cheese sandwich with a burn pattern of the Virgin Mary on it.

 

 

FEATURED FUNNIES

A wife was making a breakfast of fried eggs for her husband.  Suddenly her husband burst into the kitchen.  “Careful…  CAREFUL!  Put in some more butter!  Oh Good Grief!  You’re cooking too many at once.  TOO MANY! Turn them!  TURN THEM NOW! We need more butter.  Oh Good Grief !  WHERE are we going to get MORE BUTTER? They’re going to STICK!  Careful …  CAREFUL!  I said be CAREFUL! You NEVER listen to me when you’re cooking!  Never! Turn them!  Hurry up!  Are you CRAZY?  Have you LOST your mind?  Don’t forget to salt them.  You know you always forget to salt them.  Use the salt.  USE THE SALT!  THE SALT!”

The wife stared at him.  “What on earth is wrong with you?  You think I don’t know how to fry a couple of eggs?

The husband calmly replied, “I just wanted to show you what it feels like when I’m driving.

 

 

IT MUST BE TRUE BECAUSE I HEARD IT ON THE RADIO!

PUNISHMENT WILL INCREASE UNTIL YOU START HAVING FUN

Schools in Britain are starting to ban various playtime activities.

Football causes injuries, so it’s already gone from some schools. But so is skipping rope because “some girls fell over.” A popular game called “conkers” that calls for chestnuts has been banned because the nuts “could be used as offensive weapons.” The trend was discovered by Keele University researcher Sarah Thompson, who noted that “all the schools I visited saw playtime as a time that could not be left entirely to the children’s wishes.” Also, she noted, the teachers at the schools she studied complained that once given the list of things they could not do during playtime, the kids just don’t seem to want to play anymore. (AFP)  ***MARLAR: Once again the kids are proven smarter than the teachers.

 

 

INSPIRATIONAL INSPIRATION

LOOKING BACK

Looking back, it’s hard to believe that we have lived as long as we have.

– As children we would ride in cars with no seat belts or air bags. Riding in the back of a pickup truck on a warm day was always a special treat.

Our baby cribs were painted with bright colored lead based paint. We often chewed on the crib, ingesting the paint.

We had no childproof lids on medicine bottles, doors, or cabinets, and when we rode our bikes we had no helmets.

We drank water from the garden hose and not from a bottle.

We would spend hours building our go-carts out of scraps, then rode down the hill, only to find out we forgot the brakes. After running into the bushes a few times we learned to solve the problem.

We would leave home in the morning and play all day, as long as we were back when the streetlights came on. No one was able to reach us all day.

We played dodge ball and sometimes the ball would really hurt.

We ate cupcakes, bread and butter, and drank sugar soda, but we were never overweight; we were always outside playing.

Little League had tryouts and not everyone made the team. Those who didn’t had to learn to deal with disappointment.

Some students weren’t as smart as others or didn’t work hard so they failed a grade and were held back to repeat the same grade.

That generation produced some of the greatest risk-takers and problem solvers.

We had the freedom, failure, success and responsibility, and we learned how to deal with it all.

 

 

DRIVE TIME DEVOTIONAL

MONKEY ADDICTS
A scientist conducted an experiment in which he made cocaine available to some monkeys. These monkeys could pull a lever in their cages to release a little cocaine into their feeding tray. Not surprisingly, the monkeys became addicted to the drug. As the experiment continued, the scientist found that if the addicted monkeys could get additional cocaine hits any time they wanted by just pulling the lever, all of them would overdose. They all ended up killing themselves.
The scientist then tried another experiment with addicted monkeys. He began to withhold the fix when the monkey pulled the lever. Over and over these monkeys pulled the lever, trying to get cocaine. They continued to pull the lever not ten times, not a hundred times, or even a thousand times. Those addicted monkeys pulled it an average of 12,800 times!
Powerful addictions can rule the lives of people — addictions to work, food, gambling, sex, alcohol, or drugs. Some finally reach a point where they lose any hope of breaking free. Some even turn aside from help offered,
convinced that they’re a hopeless case.
But there’s hope in Christ. He can set any person free from the addiction of sin. He can give you a fresh start on your life. When you invite Christ into your life, the change begins to take place–from the inside out. You can’t
beat addictions on your own, but through the power of Christ, you can be set free. “I no longer live, but Christ lives in me” (Galatians 2:20).
Edited from Still More Hot Illustrations for Youth Talks by Wayne Rice.

 

 

LEFTOVERS

I LOVE YOU WITH ALL OF MY KIDNEY

While you and I are trying to figure out what kind of roses or candy to provide for our Valentine this year, an Ohio woman won’t be giving away her heart…

…but she will be giving away her kidney! 25 year old Jenny Menhennet of Akron is giving one of her healthy kidneys to her 34-year-old husband Jay during transplant surgery scheduled for Valentines day. One of Jay’s kidneys has been destroyed by diabetes.  ***MARLAR: You know, this kind of makes my candy hearts that say, “Be Mine” and “You’re cute” look pretty lame and superficial, doesn’t it?

 

 

LIFE… LIVE IT

CHEAP VALENTINE

Have a lotta love in your heart, but not a lot of loot to back it up? Not to worry — the most romantic Valentine’s Day gifts require imagination, not money.  

“Think back on the most treasured gifts you’ve received,” says Laura Shanahan, a New York consumer-tips columnist. “Chances are they were the most thoughtful, not the most costly.” Here are a few of her tips for Valentine’s gifts that show the most caring, not the most cash:

  1. An appointment book with one date filled in — that of a romantic getaway for the two of you. It doesn’t have to be a Caribbean cruise. A day of “playing hooky” together at an out-of-the-way park and a back table at a dim bistro are perfect for creating that loving feeling.
  2. For the married Valentines… a gift certificate for your honey’s choice of pampering treatments performed by you. A massage, shampoo, and a bubble bath with room service — their wish is your command.
  3. A heart-shaped box from card or novelty store. Place a handwritten note inside: “Contains 365 blown kisses just for you — take one a day.”
  4. Another great married Valentines idea – pajamas for the two of you. He wears the pants, she wears the top.
  5. A cozy picnic. Never mind the snow. Lay out a blanket on the living room floor. Don’t forget the candles.
  6. Sweep your sweetie off his or her feet with tickets to a ballroom dancing class so you can stay cheek to cheek all year round.
  7. Indoor “sky writing” is a great way to say I love you to that special someone. Simply make a poster with a declaration of your devotion and tape it to the ceiling right over the bed. It will be the first thing your sweetheart will see upon wakening Valentine’s Day — and your final, sweet-dreams message.
  8. A dozen red balloons. Before you blow them up, insert tiny trinkets or love notes. Give the blown-up, treasure-filled results to your beloved for a popping good time.
  9. A blank journal you’ll head “Reasons I Love You.” Every reason will have it’s own page.

 

 

JUST FOR FUN

STORY OF ST. VALENTINE

More facts and fables surround St. Valentine’s Day than any other holiday. One of the most fascinating is the story of St. Valentine himself.

Although research has turned up a number of saints named Valentine, one is most likely the namesake of the familiar holiday. He is credited with helping Christians during their persecution by Claudius II, the Roman Emperor, in the third century. The Romans at that time made it a crime to provide aid and comfort to Christians. According to history, Valentinus (the Latin form) was thrown into a dungeon. His jailer, Asterius, was not overly harsh, but the priest had only the barest necessities of life. His one comfort while in prison was his friendship with Asterius’ blind daughter. She befriended the kindly priest by bringing him food and delivering messages. After a year in jail, Valentinus was summoned to appear before Claudius II. The emperor was so impressed by the young priest’s dignity that Claudius attempted to convert him to worshipping Roman gods to save him from execution. Valentinus, however, refused to renounce Christianity and attempted to convert the emperor to Christianity. Claudius became furious and ordered that St. Valentine be beaten with clubs, stoned and executed. In the last days of his life Valentinus, through his faith, restored the sight of the jailer’s daughter. He also converted Asterius and the girl to Christianity, an act which resulted in their execution by Claudius. On the eve of his execution the priest wrote a farewell message to the girl and signed it “From Your Valentine.” His execution was carried out on Feb. 14, 269 A.D., outside the Flaminian Gate in Rome. According to legend, a pink almond tree, a symbol of abiding love, blossomed near his grave.

The valentine has become the universal symbol of friendship and affection shared each anniversary of the priest’s execution — Valentine’s Day.

 

 

FUN LIST

CLASSES FOR GROWN MEN

  • Going to the Supermarket: It’s Not Just for Women Anymore!
  • Recycling Skills I: Boxes that the Electronics Came In
  • Recycling Skills II: Styrofoam that Came in the Boxes that the Electronics Came In
  • Bathroom Etiquette I: How to Remove Beard Clippings from the Sink
  • Bathroom Etiquette II: Let’s Wash Those Towels!
  • Bathroom Etiquette III: Five Easy Ways to Tell When You’re About to Run Out of Toilet Paper!
  • Giving Back to the Community: How to Donate 15-Year-Old Levis to Goodwill
  • Retro? Or Just Hideous? Re-examining Your 1970s Polyester Shirts
  • No, The Dishes Won’t Wash Themselves: Knowing the Limitations of Your Kitchenware
  • Romance: More Than a Cable Channel!
  • Strange But True!: She Really May Not Care What “Fourth Down and Ten” Means
  • Going Out to Dinner: Beyond Pizza Hut
  • Expand Your Entertainment Options: Renting Movies That Don’t Fall Under the “Action/Adventure” Category
  • Yours, Mine, and Ours: Sharing the Remote
  • “I Could Have Played a Better Game Than That!”: Why Women Laugh

 

 

MORE SHOW PREP STUFF…

What are the most-used computer passwords in the world?  And how long would it take a hacker to guess your password?

 

What are the most-used computer passwords in the world?  They’re pretty simple…

123456

Password

12345678

Qwerty

abc123

 

How long would it take for a hacker to guess your password?  Less time than you might think.

Length of 6 characters…

Lowercase: 10 minutes.

Lowercase + Uppercase: 10 hours

Lowercase + Uppercase + Numbers and Symbols: 18 days

 

Length of 7 characters…

Lowercase: 4 hours

Lowercase + Uppercase: 23 days

Lowercase + Uppercase + Numbers and Symbols: 4 years

 

Length of 8 characters…

Lowercase: 4 days

Lowercase + Uppercase: 3 years

Lowercase + Uppercase + Numbers & Symbols: 463 years

 

Length of 9 characters…

Lowercase: 4 months

Lowercase + Uppercase: 178 years

Lowercase + Uppercase + Numbers & Symbols: 44,530 years

 

 

OTHER STUFF I WANT TO CRAM INTO TODAY’S PREP

Want the perfect Valentine for the man in your life? The web site iMom has some full color coupons that you can print and present to your husband. Download your copy at http://bit.ly/1za6GJy.

 

Mining asteroids for minerals is one step closer to reality after the tiny country of Luxembourg announced plans Wednesday to help the fledgling industry get into orbit. According to NBC News, The Luxembourg Ministry of the Economy announced the first government initiative in Europe to develop a legal and regulatory framework on the future ownership of minerals extracted from objects in space, such as asteroids. It also said it would invest in related research and development projects and may directly invest in companies active in the field.

http://nbcnews.to/1TFgBWp

 

A California nurse made one little boy’s day after she accepted his hospital “proposal.” According to Yahoo News, AJ Robinson said his son, 5-year-old Gideon, was diagnosed with leukemia on Nov. 17, 2015. Gideon was then sent to Rady Children’s Hospital in San Diego for chemotherapy, where he met his favorite nurse, Sarah Richards. Robinson said that Gideon got the idea to ask Nurse Sarah to “marry” him after finding out she didn’t have a husband. On January 27, Gideon made a ring out of a bead and pipe cleaner and presented it to her in front hospital staff. Robinson said “She agreed and she said, ‘Of course, you can be my hospital husband,'”

http://abcn.ws/1mdQvMC

 

 

AND I LEAVE YOU WITH THIS THOUGHT

Most portions of today’s program came to you live. However, we will have a moment of silence for those portions that didn’t.

 

 

THE TICKET Movie Reviews with MARIE ASNER

Marie Asner has been reviewing films for over 30 years. Her outlets include radio, print and Internet.  For more in-depth movie reviews of the following films, visit www.Tollbooth.org.  Ratings from 1 (Low) to 5 (High).

 

FEBRUARY 05, 2016…

 

The Choice—This is a romance/drama about the choices one makes in life. Especially love at first sight. The cast includes Tom Welling (“Superman” TV series), Benjamin Walker (“In The Heart Of The Sea”), Teresa Palmer and Maggie Grace. “The Choice” is rated PG 13. No rating.

 

Hail! Caesar—A comedy with a back of the hand to Hollywood.  A superstar is kidnapped and the production can’t go on without him, but, then, who might care?? The stars in this film play their roles broadly and they include George Clooney, Josh Brolin, Jonah Hill and Scarlett Johannson. Directed by none other than the Coen Brothers. “Hail! Caesar” is rated PG 13. Rating of 3 for fans.

 

Pride and Prejudice and Zombies—Author Jane Austen’s books are in the public domain, who would have thought? Anyway, we now get “Pride and Prejudice and Zombies” starring Lily James from “Downton Abbey” playing Elizabeth. Corsets and martial arts are the theme here, as Lily and her sisters Bella Heathcote and Suki Waterhouse (Kitty) go after the bad guys. Also in the cast is Sam Riley (Mr. Darcy) and Charles Dance. “Pride and Prejudice and Zombies” is rated R. No rating.

 

Regression—This is a psychological study as a father is accused of abusing his daughter and can’t remember doing anything. The cast includes Ethan Hawke, David Dencik, Emma Watson and David Thewlis. “Regression” is rated R. No rating.

 

FEBRUARY 12, 2016…

 

Where To Invade is a documentary, rather tongue in cheek, by Michael Moore about traveling the world for information to help America.

 

Deadpool comes from the comics and has Ryan Reynolds in the title role.

 

How To Be Single is about women trying to get along without men in their lives. A comedy to be sure and starring Rebel Wilson and Dakota Johnson.

 

Zoolander 2 with Ben Stiller and Owen Wilson from the cult-classic comedy and reprising their roles as Derek and Hansel.

 

The Bad Hurt concerns a family trying to stay together through hurts and secrets. Stars Ashley Williams and Karen Allen.

 

 

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