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PRINTER FRIENDLY VERSION: 20150719
WELCOME TO THE SHOW!
A serious sanity check is recommended before listening with both ears.
BIBLE VERSE OF THE DAY
“Jesus spoke a parable to them, that men always ought to pray and not lose heart.” –Luke 18:1
I will praise you with an upright heart as I learn your righteous laws. — Psalm 119:7
HEARTLIGHT VERSE & THOUGHT
Don’t let anyone look down on you because you are young, but set an example for the believers in speech, in life, in love, in faith and in purity. — 1 Timothy 4:12
Thought: How do you command the respect of others when you are young? You don’t! You earn that respect by the character and quality of your life. Those of us who are older must recognize and validate younger Christians who are people of character and faith. Those of us who are younger, need to live a life of character that cannot be questioned. Character, morality, faith, and loving kindness are essential attributes of the Christian, no matter his or her age.
Prayer: Holy God, I thank you for those in our church family who are young and stand for your character and who live godly lives despite pressure from their peers to do otherwise. Father, I also thank you for those who are older in the faith, who have given me a chance to use my gifts and who have influenced and encouraged me in my spiritual growth. Please help us keep our church united in mission and purpose across the different age groups, to your glory and for the growth of your Kingdom. In Jesus’ name I pray. Amen.
“BIRTH VERSE” OF THE DAY
The chapter and verse corresponds to the month and the day!
Ecclesiastes 7:19 NIV = Wisdom makes one wise man more powerful than ten rulers in a city.
TODAY IS SUNDAY – JULY 19, 2015
(NOTE: Some holidays may be duplicated due to various calendars reporting conflicting dates)
WEIRD, WACKY, STRANGE, ZANY, ODD, BIZARRE, QUIRKY, UNUSUAL HOLIDAYS!
THERE ARE ONLY 160 SHOPPING DAYS UNTIL CHRISTMAS.
Today is NATIONAL MONOSODIUM GLUTAMATE DAY. ***MARLAR: I hear they’re planning a tasteful celebration.
Today is LORD OF THE RINGS DAY. “The Fellowship of the Ring,” the first part of J.R.R. Tolkien’s epic, “The Lord of the Rings,” was published on this day in 1954.
Today is SIT UP STRAIGHT DAY. ***MARLAR: Don’t slouch. Make your father proud of you.
Today is NATIONAL GRILLED CHEESE SANDWICH DAY. ***MARLAR: My dad used to make grilled cheese without a grill. He’d make toast, butter the toast, put a piece of cheese between the two slices with the butter facing inward, and then microwave the sandwich for 30-seconds. For some reason, even with the same ingredients, it just didn’t turn out the same. He called it a grilled cheese – but to me, it was more like a micro-nasty-cheese.
Today is STICK YOUR TONGUE OUT DAY. ***MARLAR: Something I often did to Dad when his back was turned after making me a micro-nasty-cheese.
Today is DEADLY MIST DAY, the day the deadly mist began rolling across the lake in Stephen King’s The Mist. ***MARLAR: You think that’s scary… you should see the fog my dad’s micro-nasty cheese sandwiches bring after lunch!
TODAY IS ALSO. . .
Anne Hutchinson Memorial Day
National Ice Cream Day
Lake Superior Day
COMING UP NEXT
MONDAY, JULY 20
Global Hug your Kid Day
Space Exploration Day
National Lollipop Day
National Get Out Of The Doghouse Day
TUESDAY, JULY 21
Legal Drinking Age Day
No Pet Store Puppies Day
WEDNESDAY, JULY 22
Casual Pi Day (22/7)
Fragile X Awareness Day
THURSDAY, JULY 23
Gorgeous Grandma Day
Hot Enough For Ya Day
FRIDAY, JULY 24
National Drive-Thru Day
National Tequila Day
Tell An Old Joke Day
SATURDAY, JULY 25
Carousel Day (Merry-Go-Round Day)
SUNDAY, JULY 26
Paddle for Perthes Disease Awareness Day
MONDAY, JULY 27
National Korean War Veterans Armistice Day
Take Your Houseplant For a Walk Day
Walk on Stilts Day
ON THIS DAY
1948: “Our Miss Brooks,” starring Eve Arden, debuted on CBS Radio.
1954: Sun Records in Memphis released it’s first single (Sun 209) by 19-year-old Elvis Presley, “That’s All Right (Mama)” backed with “Blue Moon of Kentucky.” Both tracks featured guitarist Scotty Moore and bass player Bill Black.
1957: American International Pictures released actor Michael Landon’s first feature film, “I Was A Teenage Werewolf.”
1962: Ray Charles’ Modern Sounds in Country and Western Music was certified gold. The LP was on Billboard’s country album chart 101 weeks, including 14 weeks at #1.
1966: Frank Sinatra married actress Mia Farrow at the Sands Hotel in Las Vegas. Mia was 20, Frank was 48.
1974: Juan Henshore drew a one-year suspended sentence in London for shooting pigeons in Trafalgar Square with a bow and arrow. Juan said he hated pigeons.
1985: Christa McAuliffe of New Hampshire was chosen to be the first schoolteacher to ride aboard the space shuttle. McAuliffe and six other crew members died when the Challenger exploded shortly after liftoff.
1986: In Hyannis Port, Massachusetts, 28-year-old Caroline Kennedy married 42-year-old Albert Schlossberg. Her uncle, Senator Ted Kennedy, gave her away.
1992: Paul Lynch set a new world record in London by doing 40,401 pushups in 24 hours.
1993: The Department of Defense announced its “Don’t ask, Don’t tell, Don’t pursue” policy toward homosexuals in the military.
1994: Susan Montgomery blew a record bubble-gum bubble in Fresno, California. It measured 23 inches in diameter.
1995: LaToya Jackson filed for bankruptcy protection.
1999: Desirae, Deanna, and Christopher Diaz became the first triplets to be born live on the World Wide Web. They were delivered by Caesarean section at Good Samaritan Medical Center in Phoenix.
1999: “Weird Al” Yankovic kicked off his “Running With Scissors” tour in Green Bay, Wisconsin.
2003: A 42-year-old Austrian man received the world’s first transplanted tongue at Vienna’s General Hospital. During the 14-hour surgery, doctors removed a malignant tumor and successfully attached the new tongue.
2005: U.S. Appeals Court Judge John Roberts was nominated by U.S. President George Bush to the U.S. Supreme Court, replacing the resigned Sandra Day O’Connor.
TODAY IN CHRISTIAN HISTORY
64: Rome burns and its destruction is blamed on Christians by Nero who then persecutes them.
1662: Death of Blaise Pascal, the renowned French mathematician, scientist and Christian apologist.
1692: Puritan magistrates convict and hang five women for witchcraft in Salem, Massachusetts. By September, 20 people had been executed on charges brought by 15 young girls.
1848: More than 300 men and women assemble in the Wesleyan Chapel at Seneca Falls, New York, for the first formal convention to discuss “the social, civil and religious condition and the rights of women.” The event has been called the birthplace of the women’s rights movement.
1938 – Death of Paul Radar. The former boxer/wrestler became an evangelist, pastored Chicago churches, served as president of the Christian and Missionary Alliance, and pioneered radio ministries.
HOLLYWOOD, SPORTS AND CELEBRITY FIGURE BIRTHDAYS
- actress (“The Guiding Light”) Rachel Miner 35
- actor (Doctor Mark Greene on “ER”, The Forgotten, Top Gun) Anthony Edwards 52 (
- actor (“Sunset Beach”, “The Bold & The Beautiful”, “The Young & The Restless”) Peter Barton 59 (
(Music Artist Birthdays From SongFacts.com)
1925 : Sue Thompson
1932 : Buster Benton
1937 : George Hamilton IV
1941 : Vicki Carr
1944 : Commander Cody
1946 : Alan Gorrie (Average White Band)
1947 : Bernie Leadon (Eagles)
1947 : Brian May (Queen)
1947 : Phil Upchurch
1947 : Keith Godchaux (Grateful Dead)
1952 : Allen Collins (Lynyrd Skynyrd)
1960 : Kevin Haskins (Love & Rockets)
SECRETS OF THE UNIVERSE
Does it matter that North is at the top of all maps?
Only until relatively recent times was North at the top of most maps. For several centuries of cartography, East was on top. Or, shall we say, where the sun rose was the most important direction.
CHRISTIAN ARTIST NEWS
Do you like the Christian Artist News you see below? It’s just a tiny sample of the 5-6 pages of material you could be receive every weekday… and it’s FREE! Become one of their subscribers at ChristianRadioShowPrepServices.com!
Audio Adrenaline is going Hip Hop, at least for one song. Members of the band this week shared that they were working on a song collaboration with Christian Hip Hop artist The Real Young Noah. They say: can’t wait for you guys to hear it!
Casting Crowns Juan DeVevo recent went to his first political rally ever. After the meeting he gave his official endorsement, sharing: I can say the candidate is worthy of your vote. However, it might be a little difficult for most of us to follow Juan’s example. He was at a rally for a City Council candidate in McDonough, Georgia.
Ellie Holcomb tweeted: My 2 year old wanted to take a picture of herself with my point and shoot today, and said this: “I want to take a MYselfie!”
Chris from Love and The Outcome was at the movies watching Jurassic World this week and his wife and fellow member of the group, Jodi, was taking advantage of the alone time. She tweeted that she had been in the store Forever 21 for two hours.
Matt Maher was preparing this week for his son’s birthday. No, he wasn’t baking a cake. He tweeted that he was watching Star Wars. It should be pretty simple to guess the theme of the upcoming party.
Mercyme recently sat down to talk about their latest album and their life on their road. The members of the band even gave some advice to up and coming artists. And front man Bart Millard shared that he is joining several other member of the band in working out. In fact, he says he just hired a personal trainer to help in his workout efforts. https://t.co/jAxOZZNiFS
A bit of baseball humor this week from Mercyme’s Bart Millard: What are the odds Pete Rose would be at the all star game? See what I did there? Betting Joke.
Skillet is back in Billboard’s Fan Army face off. After a fantastic response from their fans, called Panheads, last year, members of the band are asking their followers to step up again this year. Skillet has already make it through round one. They defeated Hillsong United in the balloting that wrapped up on July 15. http://t.co/UEAoVZuvA5
The group 4Him is celebrating 25 years of music and 25 No. 1 hits. The band is Reuniting later this year for the 25 Years 4Him Tour, featuring many of the song that have inspired multiple generations and countless believers. 4Him member Mark Harris shared: “The four of us are so excited about getting back together this fall for the 25 Years 4Him Tour. It’s hard to believe that it has been that long since we first headed out on the road.” http://t.co/ycDPAUzpf4
Mercyme’s Bart Millard and Chris Huffman from Casting Crowns were getting in the spirit during this years All Star Game. Bart tweeted: if I were a Major League Baseball player, my walk up music would be either Levert’s “Casa Nova” or Aladdin’s “A Whole New World.” Chris replied: my walk up song would be “Homerun” by Geoff Moore and The Distance or “Strike Back” by the band We As Human.
WEIRD & WACKY
|Police: Man uninjured after being run over by freight train
SCHAGHTICOKE, N.Y. (AP) — State police say a man escaped injury after being run over by a freight train while sleeping in the middle of railroad tracks in an upstate New York town. Troopers say 38-year-old Aaron Collins of Stillwater was highly intoxicated when he went to sleep Wednesday…
|60-pound dead fish found in suburban Kansas drainage ditch photo
OLATHE, Kan. (AP) — A suburban Kansas City animal control officer says she was skeptical when a man called to report a 4-foot-long carp in a drainage ditch. But Jamie Schmidt, a school resource officer with the Olathe, Kansas, Police Department, soon found herself wrapping up the 60-pound…
|Summer hail prompts use of snowplows in South Dakota city photo
RAPID CITY, S.D. (AP) — A brief but intense hailstorm that dropped as much as 4 inches of slippery pellets in a South Dakota city prompted officials to call out snowplows in the middle of summer. HASH(0x13fe8b0) The National Weather Service says pea-size hail pelted the highway for about 15…
|Video shows plane making emergency landing on Jersey highway
STAFFORD TOWNSHIP, N.J. (AP) — Police have released a video of a small plane carrying students from a skydiving school making an emergency landing on a New Jersey highway. No one aboard the single-engine plane or on the ground was injured when the plane touched down Sunday morning in Stafford…
|Netanyahu gets yearbook from his Pennsylvania high school photo
CHELTENHAM, Pa. (AP) — Some suburban Philadelphia high school alumni say they’ve sent a 1960s yearbook to one of their most famous classmates, Israeli Prime Minister Benjamin Netanyahu (neh-ten-YAH’-hoo). HASH(0x13f5800) Netanyahu left school around the time of the Six-Day War in June 1967…
|Scientists in Oregon develop bacon-flavored seaweed
PORTLAND, Ore. (AP) — What grows quickly, is packed with protein, has twice the nutritional value of kale and tastes like bacon? The answer, according to scientists at Oregon State University, is a new strain of seaweed they recently patented. Dulse is a form of edible seaweed that grows wild…
|AP Top News At 11:20 a.m. EDT|
|Vegas weddings decline; officials consider more advertising
LAS VEGAS (AP) — At its peak, Las Vegas was home to one out of every 20 weddings in the United States. That number, however, has been dropping. HASH(0x140c620) The city’s multimillion-dollar industry for providing easy, quick marriages has noticed increased competition as the numbers…
|‘I just like pigs’: Cops say nude man found drinking in barn
MILLERSVILLE, Pa. (AP) — Police have charged a man with trespassing, public drunkenness and indecent exposure after he was caught on a neighbor’s Pennsylvania farm in the nude, drinking beer among pigs. Police in Manor Township, Lancaster County, say 64-year-old Larry Henry told them, “I just…
|Boston’s tower of filthy snow finally melts away photo
BOSTON (AP) — The last of Boston’s winter nightmare has finally melted away. Mayor Martin Walsh announced Tuesday that Boston’s once-massive pile of filthy snow has officially dwindled to nothing. The pile accumulated into a 75-foot tower of snow after a record-breaking winter that dumped…
HEALTH & FITNESS
|Could Martha’s Vineyard, Nantucket miss out on medical pot? photo
BOSTON (AP) — Massachusetts has a cannabis conundrum. State law requires every county to have a dispensary for medical marijuana, but federal regulations forbid the drug from being transported across U.S. waters. That leaves the tourist havens of Martha’s Vineyard and Nantucket potless unless…
|70 years after atomic bomb test, residents seek compensation photo
LOS ALAMOS, N.M. (AP) — When a flash of light beamed from the arid New Mexico desert early on July 16, 1945, residents of the historic Hispanic village of Tularosa felt windows shake and heard dishes fall. Some in the largely Catholic town fell to their knees and prayed. The end of the world…
|Probe: Bogus enrollees kept getting ‘Obamacare’ photo
WASHINGTON (AP) — Phony applicants that investigators signed up last year under President Barack Obama’s health care law got automatically re-enrolled for 2015. Some were rewarded with even bigger taxpayer subsidies for their insurance premiums, a congressional probe has found. The…
|Liberia confirms 2nd Ebola death in resurgent outbreak photo
MONROVIA, Liberia (AP) — A second person in Liberia has died from Ebola in the latest resurgence of the deadly disease in the West African nation, an official said Wednesday. The woman in her early 20s who died on July 12 was linked to the 17-year-old boy who died last month, Deputy Health…
|Study show high-risk areas for Lyme disease growing photo
NEW YORK (AP) — The geographic areas where Lyme disease is a bigger danger have grown dramatically, according to a new government study published Wednesday U.S. cases remain concentrated in the Northeast and upper Midwest. But now more areas in those regions are considered high risk. “The…
|Congressional panels will probe Planned Parenthood video photo
WASHINGTON (AP) — The searing political conflict over abortion flared anew Wednesday as three Republican-led congressional committees said they will investigate whether Planned Parenthood is selling organs from aborted fetuses. House Speaker John Boehner, R-Ohio, criticized the group and said…
|Study: Early clue to why some children may have reading woes photo
WASHINGTON (AP) — New research suggests it may be possible to predict which preschoolers will struggle to read — and it has to do with how the brain deciphers speech when it’s noisy. Scientists are looking for ways to tell, as young as possible, when children are at risk for later…
|11 ex-Pirelli managers convicted in Italian asbestos trial
MILAN (AP) — A Milan court has convicted 11 former Pirelli managers, including two former CEOs, on charges of manslaughter and gave them prison sentences for the deaths of about 20 workers who developed tumors or lung disease after being exposed to asbestos. The news agency ANSA said…
|Military announces plan to lift transgender ban photo
WASHINGTON (AP) — Defense Secretary Ash Carter has ordered a six-month study aimed at formally ending one of the last gender- or sexuality-based barriers to military service, saying the Pentagon’s current regulations banning transgender individuals from serving in the military need to be…
|VA says it may shut down hospitals to close $2.5B budget gap
WASHINGTON (AP) — The Department of Veterans Affairs may have to shut down some hospitals next month if Congress does not address a $2.5 billion shortfall for the current budget year, VA officials warned Monday. The VA told Congress that it needs to cover shortfalls caused by an increased…
|Colorado rejects PTSD as ailment eligible for medical pot photo
DENVER (AP) — Citing scant research, Colorado health officials voted Wednesday against adding post-traumatic stress disorder to the list of ailments eligible for treatment with medical marijuana. The 6-2 vote came despite a recommendation from Colorado’s chief medical officer and a panel of…
(None on the weekends)
NEW NEWS KICKERS…
NEWS KICKER EVERGREENS…
CLICK HERE TO DOWNLOAD TODAY’S EPISODE… “Low Walmart Prices”
DAILY COMEDY CLIP
CLICK HERE TO DOWNLOAD TODAY’S EPISODE… Joey I.L.O., “Dad Compliments”
AS THE JUNGLE TURNS – WEEKDAY VERSION
CLICK HERE TO DOWNLOAD MONDAY’S EPISODE
OPEN: And now, FancyMonkey.com, (Show Name), and (Station Call Letters) bring you As the Jungle Turns! When last we left the jungle, Racquet the Skunk was excited about being asked to draw a picture of the Rabbit Family using his brand new crayons. Unfortunately, before he could begin the portrait, he lost every single one of his crayons through a hole in his backpack!
CLOSE: Swimming? How can all of the animals think of swimming while their friend Racquet is in torment because he can’t find his crayons? Perhaps friendship in the jungle only goes crayon-deep? We’ll find out next time, as FancyMonkey.com, (Show Name), and (Station Call Letters) bring you another exciting episode of As the Jungle Turns!
AS THE JUNGLE TURNS – SATURDAY/SUNDAY VERSION
CLICK HERE TO DOWNLOAD THE EPISODE FOR THE WEEKEND OF JULY 18/19, 2015
OPEN: And now, FancyMonkey.com, (Show Name), and (Station Call Letters) bring you As the Jungle Turns! When last we left the jungle island of Razzleflabbin, Marvy Snuffleson decided to nail the hands of the clock in place on the Razzleflabbin’s calendar clock tower so that they’d always read “Saturday”. But yesterday was Saturday – and now it’s Saturday again… and there’s only bread and water to drink!
CLOSE: Marvy would still rather have bread and water every single day at every meal rather than work? How long will he let the calendar clock read Saturday? Find out next time, As the Jungle Turns!
***You may simulcast “As the Jungle Turns” on the Internet stream of your live broadcast only. Any other Internet use of As the Jungle Turns in whole or part including podcasting of your live broadcast is a violation of copyright law. Thank you for your cooperation on this vitally important issue. If you have any questions, please e-mail us.
MOMENT OF DUH
Who would take their garbage and dump it on the highway when they have a garbage service to pick it up at their own driveway? A true inDUHvidual, that’s who!
73-year-old retired obstetrician Parviz “Peter” Modaber was ordered by a judge to just stay out of Clarke County, Virginia. This was following his fourth conviction for taking bags of garbage from his home near Charles Town, West Virginia, and dumping them along a highway in Clarke County. Incidentally, court records showed that Dr. Modaber had done this many more than four times. His attorney explained that the good doctor held an intense grudge against the state for having suspended his license during the 1980’s and Clarke County just happened to be near his home. Dr. Modaber had been sentenced three times to a total of 540 hours of picking up litter, but a vigilant citizen caught him dumping yet again less than six months after the third conviction.
TOP TEN SIGNS YOU MIGHT BE BAPTIST…
- You have never sung the third verse of any hymn.
- You think that someone who says “amen” while the pastor is preaching is charismatic.
- You complain because your pastor only works one day a week and then “he works too long.”
- You clapped in church last Sunday and felt guilty all week.
- You woke up craving fried chicken, mashed potatoes and green beans and interpreted it as a “call” to preach.
- You’re old enough to get senior citizen discounts, but not old enough to be promoted into the senior adult dept.
- You think John the Baptist founded the Southern Baptist Convention.
- You think God’s presence is always strongest in the last three pews.
- You honestly believe the Apostle Paul spoke King James English.
- You believe you are supposed to take a covered dish to heaven.
THE FILES OF LAW & DISORDER
Trashing an elevator isn’t a very bright idea — especially if you’re inside it.
FILE #1: Authorities in Norway report two young men smashed up a train station elevator. But the elevator got a bit of pay-back. The doors wouldn’t open and the vandals were trapped in it until police arrived. An official with the National Rail Administration says they got what was coming to them. The two guys in their early 20’s now face criminal charges and a repair bill.
FILE #2: A thief robbed a jewelry store in a Utah town, not realizing he was surrounded by motorcycle cops having an international convention. Several off-duty officers washing their bikes heard the street vendor’s cries for help and set off in pursuit. The first to catch him on her motorcycle was Officer Louann Hamblin, from VanBuren Township in Michigan. She knocked him into a wall, handcuffed him and waited for local police officers to arrive to take him away.
FILE #3: The F-B-I says five men kicked off an Amtrak train had 700-thousand-dollars in U-S Saving Bonds, apparently stolen from a Nevada home. According to investigators, the five were taking the train to Chicago from Sacramento, California, to launder the bonds, when they were busted. They’ve been charged in federal court with crimes including possessing stolen securities. And they probably would’ve gotten away… had they not been smoking pot on the train.
STRANGE LAW: You may not tap your feet, nod your head, or in any way keep time to the music in a New Hampshire tavern, restaurant, or cafe.
THIS IS YOUR BRAIN ON DRUGS
If a police officer hits on your wife, should you then hit the police officer?
McCory J. Slemmons of Davenport, Iowa, was charged with assault while displaying a dangerous weapon and public intoxication. A detective was monitoring an area where officers were looking for a robbery suspect early Wednesday morning when Slemmons approached him and accused the detective of “looking at his wife”. Slemmons then challenged the detective to a fight and pulled out nunchuks. The detective arrested Slemmons, who later admitted during a police interview that had been drinking.
What movies have you seen this summer that you were sorely disappointed in?
BIBLE BRAIN BUSTER!
QUESTION: Who had a dream about birds eating from a basket on his head?
ANSWER: Pharaoh’s baker (Genesis 40:16-17)
QUESTION: What are the names of Barbie’s parents?
ANSWER: George and Margaret.
TRUE OR FALSE
Pay attention! If our next player doesn’t answer all ten T/F questions correctly we start all over from question #1! First person to answer question #10 correctly is our winner!
- The world’s largest four-faced is England’s “Big Ben.” (False – the largest four-faced clock sits atop the Allen-Bradley plant in Milwaukee, Wisconsin.)
- Almonds are members of the peach family. (True)
- The first video ever played on MTV Europe was “Video Killed the Radio Star”. (False – it was “Money For Nothing” by Dire Straits)
- If you add up the numbers 1-100 consecutively (1+2+3+4+5 etc) the total is exactly 10,000. (False – it’s 5,050)
- The man who was the voice of Tony the Tiger also sang the song, “Your a Mean One, Mr. Grinch” in the Dr. Seuss Christmas special. (True)
- The famous split-fingered Vulcan salute from Star Trek is actually a Jewish sign. (True. It is intended to represent the first letter “shin,” pronounced “sheen” of the word “shalom.” As a small boy, Leonard Nimoy observed his rabbi using it in a benediction and never forgot it; eventually he was able to add it to “Star Trek” lore.)
- The symbol on the “pound” key (#) is called an octothorpe. (True)
- The Chinese invented firearms. (False. While the Chinese invented gunpowder, they were not the first to develop firearms.)
- Revolvers cannot be fitted for silencers. (True – due to all the noisy gasses which escape the cylinder gap at the rear of the barrel.)
- The term “the whole 9 yards” came from NFL football. (False – it came from WWII fighter pilots in the South Pacific. When arming their airplanes on the ground, the .50 caliber machine gun ammo belts measured exactly 27 feet, before being loaded into the fuselage. If the pilots fired all their ammo at a target, it got “the whole 9 yards.”)
TABLOID MATCH GAME
You have to match the blank in the tabloid headline with the word or phrase that has been removed!
“Zoo Lets Visitors Play Tug of War With _______” (Lions and Tigers)
Despite the dangers, the Houston Zoo allows visitors to play “tug of war” with its own lions and tigers. A 20-pound slab of meat, attached to a long rope, is tossed into the enclosure, and visitors are encouraged to toy with the cats by yanking on the rope as the animal lunges for it. Zookeepers say it keeps the animals from getting bored.
THE WAY TOO EARLY IN THE MORNING TO UNDERSTAND THE PUNCHLINE EVEN AFTER TWO CUPS OF COFFEE JOKE OF THE DAY
An atheist professor was teaching a college class and he told the class that he was going to prove that there was no God. He said, “God if you are real, then I want you to knock me off this platform. I’ll give you 15 minutes!”
Ten minutes went by. He kept taunting God, saying, “Here I am God, I’m still waiting.” He got down to the last couple of minutes and a big 240-pound football player happened to walk by the door and heard what the professor said. The football player walked into the classroom and in the last minute, hit the professor full force, sending him flying off the platform.
The professor got up, obviously shaken, and said, “Where did you come from, and why did you do that?”
The football player replied, “God sent me!”
Having just completed my training as the hospital’s switch-board operator, I was reasonably confident that I knew all the codes for emergencies:
Code Blue for cardiac arrest, Code Red for fire, etc.
My first night on the job alone, however, a nurse phoned and asked me to page a “Code Brown, Room 214.”
I had no idea what that was. I called the page, then searched frantically through my emergency manual, but I couldn’t find any description of it anywhere.
Stumped, I finally called the nurse back and asked her about it.
“Relax,” laughed the nurse. “Code Brown is what we page when a patient is discharged and leaves behind an unfinished box of chocolates!”
Husband: I know you are having a lot of trouble with the baby, Dear, but keep in mind, “the hand that rocks the cradle is the hand that rules the world.”
Wife: How about taking over the world for a few hours while I go shopping…?
A study has found that fish in Washington’s Spokane River have an extremely high concentration of toxic flame retardants. ***MARLAR: You can still catch the fish but you’ll have a heck of a time trying to fry one.
Some restaurants in Britain are forcing customers who like their meat rare to sign a disclaimer form before eating due to fears of the risk of E-coli and salmonella poisoning. ***MARLAR: We have a similar disclaimer next to the radio station’s coffee-maker.
IT MUST BE TRUE BECAUSE I HEARD IT ON THE RADIO!
Here’s a sad statement about America.
Virtually every town along the 20 miles of the Long Beach Island seashore in New Jersey has signs warning beach lovers of the dangers of rip tides. However, Long Beach Township itself does not. This, even though experts say that most summer visitors are ignorant of the powerful currents and how to cope with them. Township Attorney Richard Shackleton explained that posting such helpful warnings may actually hurt local taxpayers. Why? Well legally speaking, a town generally is under no obligation to warn swimmers of natural conditions, but Mr. Shackleton explained that once a town attempts to warn, judges and juries will too often find the warnings inadequate and award a swimmer or his survivors huge damages. ***MARLAR: In other words, they’d rather you die than sue them. That’s nice.
- Do not undermine your worth by comparing yourself with others. It is because we are different that each of us is special.
- Do not set your goals by what other people deem important. Only you know what is best for you.
- Do not take for granted the things closest to your heart. Cling to them as you would your life, for without them, life is meaningless.
- Do not let your life slip through your fingers by living in the past nor for the future. By living your life one day at a time, you live all the days of your life
- Do not give up when you still have something to give. Nothing is really over until the moment you stop trying. It is a fragile thread that binds us to each other.
- Do not be afraid to encounter risks. It is by taking chances that we learn how to be brave.
- Do not shut love out of your life by saying it is impossible to find.
- The quickest way to receive love is to give love; The fastest way to lose love is to hold it too tightly.
- Do not dismiss your dreams. To be without dreams is to be without hope; To be without hope is to be without purpose.
- Do not run through life so fast that you forget not only where you have been, but also where you are going.
DRIVE TIME DEVOTIONAL
Read: Ephesians 2:11-22
The whole building, being fitted together, grows into a holy temple in the Lord. —Ephesians 2:21
An elderly man who visited an art gallery was deeply moved by a painting that portrayed Christ on the cross. It was so realistic in depicting the suffering of the Savior that his heart was filled with gratitude for the great price the Lord Jesus paid for his redemption. With tears trickling down his cheeks, he exclaimed, “Bless Him! I love Him! I love Him!”
Other visitors standing nearby wondered what the man was talking about. One person walked over and looked at the painting. Soon he too felt deep emotion welling up in his heart. Turning to the old man, he gave him a firm handshake and said, “So do I! I love Him too!”The scene was repeated as a third man and then a fourth walked over, gazed at the painting, and exclaimed, “I love Him too!”Although these men were from different churches, they felt a common bond because of their faith in Christ.
As believers, we need an awareness of our spiritual unity with other Christians. We need to focus on the fundamentals on which we agree—such as our love for the Savior who died for us—rather than bicker about lesser issues.
Regardless of sincere disagreements, we as blood-bought believers should recognize that we have a strong family tie in Christ. —Richard De Haan
Blest be the tie that binds
Our hearts in Christian love!
The fellowship of kindred minds
Is like to that above. —Fawcett
As we draw near to Christ we are drawn near to each other.
While sitting in a restaurant, it’s not exactly what you want to hear – an explosion coming from the bathroom!
…Two men from Milwaukee were injured when they tried to flush an explosive device down a toilet and it exploded. The device blew up in the ladies’ room at Zorba’s Restaurant, injuring the two men as they attempted to run off. As it exploded, the toilet sent pieces of porcelain flying everywhere. The two men, who were both hospitalized with injuries, were arrested and charged with endangering safety and criminal damage to property. ***MARLAR: After hearing the explosion in the bathroom, I’d be asking what those guys ate – so I could avoid ordering it.
LIFE… LIVE IT
Want to increase the chances of getting your wallet or purse back if you lose it? Put some baby pictures in there!
Strangers are more likely to return lost wallets containing photos of cute babies, according to British researchers. The scientists dropped 240 wallets across Edinburgh with pictures of either a smiling baby, a puppy, a “happy family,” or a “contended elderly couple.” It turns out nobody cares about your pooch, retired parents, or smugly superior family life. But that cute little baby? Apparently it triggers a “compassionate instinct towards vulnerable infants”. When faced with the photograph of the baby, people were far more likely to send the wallet back. In fact, only one in ten were hard-hearted enough not to do so. With no picture to tug at the emotions, just one in seven were sent back. According to Dr Wiseman, “”The baby kicked off a caring feeling in people, which is not surprising.” Who knew wallet photos could be so useful?
JUST FOR FUN
PAIN IN THE NECK
A lady from England is suing the government because she hurt her neck on the job. Sort of.
…Well, not exactly on the job. She says she developed the neck pain when filling out the required forms for her application for a pay raise! The lady claims she spent 11 hours filling out the seven page form and it caused her severe neck pain. She’s seeking about $3,000 in the lawsuit. ***MARLAR: Sounds like this woman’s employer also has a little pain in the neck to deal with.
TOP FIVE SIGNS THAT YOUR BOSS DOESN’T LIKE YOU
- He asks you to step outside for a moment and you’re on a submarine
- He invites you to stop by his office and pick up something that rhymes with “mink’s lip”
- Wants to know if you’d be interested in the company’s new Baghdad office
- At the company picnic, tries to convince you that everybody else’s dunk tanks also have piranha in them.
- Has your picture in the front lobby along with a sign that says, “Need a hostage?”
MORE SHOW PREP STUFF…
He could remember her smile, her hair and the first day they met in the early 1940s. But it took Ralph Dial more than 60 years to remember her name. It finally came to him while driving during Christmastime in 2002. He tracked her down by going through old newspapers in Knoxville, Tennessee. He found her name on a letter to the editor. He called the Knoxville News Sentinel and the editorial department contacted Vinita Anderson on Dial’s behalf. She called him a few minutes later. She only lived 30 miles away. They were both widowed, so they continued their conversation over dinner — and four years later, Dial asked for Anderson’s hand in marriage. They married March 17th, 2007 — the same day they became engaged the year before. ***MARLAR: If it took him sixty years to remember his true love’s name, what do you think the chances are that he’ll remember his wedding anniversary each year?
OTHER STUFF I WANT TO CRAM INTO TODAY’S PREP
(None On The Weekends)
Sixteen-year-old Autumn Veatch is alive today thanks to a “miracle.” Autumn was riding in a small plane along with her step-grandparents from Montana to Washington. For reasons unknown thus far, the plane crashed in the wilderness. Autumn survived the crash but then had to hike for two days through dense woods to find help. Following a stream, the teen made it to HWY 20 and was picked up by a motorist. She was released from the hospital earlier this week. Her father, David, described her survival as a miracle from God, in answer to hundreds of prayers. http://goo.gl/GxkMu1
Family Life Today will be hosting a I Still Do marriage-changing simulcast for couples on October 17. By exploring God’s design for marriage, couples will have a chance to reaffirm that their marriage matters – to their children and to the rest of society. Members of the organization say there are three ways you can help couples in your community. They include hosting a simulcast, taking a group to the live event, or purchasing tickets for the simulcast. http://istilldo.com/
The Word of God is under attack in Columbia Heights, Montana— literally. A billboard park dedicated to displays centered on the Ten Commandments has been the victim of a recent spree of vandalism. Seventeen of the 21 billboards at the God’s Ten Commandments Park were seriously damaged by an unknown party earlier this week. http://bit.ly/1Df4WCr
AND I LEAVE YOU WITH THIS THOUGHT
There are two things to aim at in life: first, to get what you want; and, after that, to enjoy it. Only the wisest of mankind achieve the second. – Logan Pearsall Smith
THE WAY WE WORK
(Updated as it comes available. The Way WE Work is written by Mark Elfstrand from 1160Hope.com in Chicago.)
Do “working moms” make for better moms? I may be meddlin’ here.
An article posted on the website Quartz claims mothers who work outside the home have “more successful daughters and more caring sons.” The story is based on some new Harvard “research” that should certainly help reduce the guilt that many “working moms” might have. http://qz.com/434056/working-moms-have-more-successful-daughters-and-more-caring-sons-harvard-business-school-study-says/
If you do a little more Internet research you find quite a mixed bag on this topic. There are many stories of women who leave professional careers to be at home. Others explaining how they are able to maintain the balance of work and family.
One of the more statistically deceiving set of numbers comes from a 2014 Pew Research study. It was titled, “7 Key Findings About Stay-at-Home Moms.” Point #5 claims the share of these stay-at-homes in poverty has doubled since 1970! But pay close attention to the fact that the overwhelming increase comes from married mothers with non-working husbands, cohabiting mothers, and single mothers. Actual poverty level of married mothers with working husbands increased by 15%.
The Harvard study leaves me questioning their value system for mothering. They seem to value more money and managerial jobs for the grown up young women, and more chores and home responsibilities for boys.
The final paragraph from this article really got me. It includes a quote from Professor Kathleen McGinn at the Harvard Business School and the lead author of the study. Here goes:
“Her message for working mothers is that being employed has long-lasting, positive effects on children. ‘When you go to work, you are helping your children understand that there are lots of opportunities for them,’ says McGinn.”
Hmmm. Wait. I have questions.
Let’s say a couple with children at home approached me as a faith leader at church and asked for my counsel on whether it’s best to have a stay-at-home mom. She has a nice offer from a company.
I would first ask why the mom is considering this decision. Various answers could result. Financial reasons are, indeed, usually first. Wanting to use education or professional skills would be up there. Needing greater “challenge” or purpose might come up. Each reason has its own justifications.
Next, I would ask the couple where “being the primary influencers” in the development of their children ranks. The influencer role applies to more than one category. Foremost, the moral and spiritual foundations. Next, the social skills and the vital learning of navigating difficult situations. Then, having a keen awareness of the uniqueness of the children and how to help them pursue the person God created them to be. And, of course, engaging them in meaningful conversations daily about their world.
The answers to those questions would be of significant value in offering counsel. Parents who put financial interests and personal advancement as priorities will likely go for the working mom. But common sense should tell us less time and attention with children means less influence.
I’ve yet to meet a grown up child who says, “I wish my mom worked more outside of the home.” Kids learn to take pride in their parents regardless of status. The praise I’ve witnessed most from grown up children are about the sacrifices their moms made for them. Rarely are those sacrifices derived from spending less time with them. Or earning more money.
There are situations where moms must have a paying job. However in this age, we need more moms being present and available to guide and grow their children. A stable home environment is the greatest predictor of future family well being. PLENTY of research on that.
Proverbs 6:20-23 helps here: “Good friend, follow your father’s good advice; don’t wander off from your mother’s teachings. Wrap yourself in them from head to foot; wear them like a scarf around your neck. Wherever you walk, they’ll guide you; whenever you rest, they’ll guard you; when you wake up, they’ll tell you what’s next. For sound advice is a beacon, good teaching is a light, moral discipline is a life path.” (The Message)
That instruction comes from the home. Mothers nurture children best. Why yield that privilege of child development up to someone else? Just asking.
Now…are the cookies and milk ready? Just kidding!
That’s The Way WE Work.
THE TICKET Movie Reviews with MARIE ASNER
Marie Asner has been reviewing films for over 30 years. Her outlets include radio, print and Internet. For more in-depth movie reviews of the following films, visit www.Tollbooth.org. Ratings from 1 (Low) to 5 (High).
JULY 17, 2015…
Ant Man—Marvel Comic Books does it again. Here comes “Ant Man’ and played by Paul Rudd. Instead of gigantic creatures, such as Godzilla, we have someone the size of an ant. Be careful where you step. The ant may be a science experiment in your neighborhood. This particular story has Rudd volunteering for a special suit by scientist Pym (Michael Douglas) and you can figure out the rest. There is a villain, Yellow Jacket (Corey Stoll) and at the size of an ant, just about everything can be a villain. Also in the cast is Evangeline Lilly. “Ant Man” is rated PG 13. Rating of 3 for fans.
TrainWreck—Amy Schumer is a writer who doesn’t believe in romance. It just doesn’t work out. However, when her next assignment is sports doc Bill Hader, she begins to change her mind. Also in the cast are Tilda Swinton and Brie Larson. ”TrainWreck” is rated R. No rating.
Mr. Holmes—Ian McKellen takes on the role of Sherlock Holmes, aging and with failing memory, as he does one last case. Also in the cast are Laura Linney and Milo Parker. “Mr. Holmes” is rated PG 13. Rating of 3 for fans.
Irrational Man—Joaquin Phoenix is a college teacher in the middle of a mid-life crisis. He finds it helps him to work with others, even strangers. This is a Woody Allen film and also in the cast is Jamie Blakeley. “Irrational Man” is rated PG 13. No rating.
JULY 24, 2015…
Paper Towns is a romantic comedy starring Cara Delevingne and Nat Wolff.
Pixels is an partly-animated movie about an alien invasion with the voices of Adam Sandler and Kevin James.
Pan is a fantasy and adventure film starring Hugh Jackman and a different type of “Peter Pan” story.
Southpaw stars Jake Gyllenhaal in a story about sports.
# # # # #
The Best Films and Worst Film—First Six Months of 2015 (January 15 – July 1), compiled by Marie Asner
BEST FILMS: Alphabetical Order
Dior And Me (documentary—R for language) Backstage at world famous Paris fashion house with new head designer and six weeks to go before the first show.
Inside Out (animated—PG) Story of five emotions in a young girl’s mind and how they help her cope with life
Jupiter Ascending (science fiction/fantasy—PG 13) Creative look a space royalty hierarchy and how it affects Earth
Mad Max: Fury Road (fantasy—R) Remake of the “Mad Max” series in post Apocalyptic world of Australia
Max (PG) Story of military dog who grieves loss of his handler in Afghanistan (bring hankie)
Second Best Exotic Marigold Hotel (PG 13) Continuation of first film story and this time involves planning a wedding
Seymour: An Introduction (documentary—not rated) Actor Ethan Hawke’s homage to a favorite music teacher.
Terminator Genisys (R) Clever restart of the “Terminator” franchise and Arnold Schwarzenegger steals the film.
Woman in Gold (based on true story—PG 13) Helen Mirren searches for stolen family painting from WWII and how to retrieve it.
San Andreas (PG 13)—cheesy special effects and enough rescues by Dwayne Johnson for five films.
WARNING: Don’t believe anything you read on the Internet or email (including stuff you read here) unless you can confirm it with another source, and/or it is consistent with what you already know to be true. The opinions in this publication are not necessarily those of Darren Marlar, Marlar House Entertainment, OnAirPrep.com, or any company or organization affiliated with aforementioned. (Regardless of how stupid you may think those opinions are. So there – nyah!)
Darren Marlar credits all non-original material to the author whenever possible. All other material is original, used with permission, or author unknown. We welcome all comments, questions, and suggestions. Darren can be reached via his website at www.DarrenMarlar.com.