July 19, 2017: Wednesday ONAIRprep

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ODT: 20170719
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WELCOME TO THE SHOW!

A serious sanity check is recommended before listening with both ears.

BIBLE VERSE OF THE DAY

“Jesus spoke a parable to them, that men always ought to pray and not lose heart.”  –Luke 18:1

I will praise you with an upright heart as I learn your righteous laws. — Psalm 119:7

Don’t let anyone look down on you because you are young, but set an example for the believers in speech, in life, in love, in faith and in purity. — 1 Timothy 4:12

HEARTLIGHT DAILY VERSE, PRAYER & THOUGHT

(From VerseOfTheDay.com)

For our struggle is not against flesh and blood, but against the rulers, against the authorities, against the powers of this dark world and against the spiritual forces of evil in the heavenly realms. Ephesians 6:12

Thought: This is war! We face a daily battle and it is not just with sin and temptation. We have a real foe whose desire for us is our destruction. But, our foe has already been defeated and his angels stand rebuked. So, let’s keep our spiritual vigor knowing that we’re not playing church but fighting for the Kingdom.

Prayer: Almighty and Victorious King, I praise you for conquering sin and death and law for us, and making us righteous and sinless by your grace. Thank you, in Jesus’ name. Amen.

The Thoughts and Prayers for Today’s Verse are written by Phil Ware. You can email questions or comments to phil@heartlight.org.

BIRTHDAY VERSE” OF THE DAY (The chapter and verse correspond to the month and day!)

Ecclesiastes 7:19 NIV = Wisdom makes one wise man more powerful than ten rulers in a city.

TODAY IS WEDNESDAY – JULY 19, 2017

(NOTE: Some holidays may be duplicated due to various calendars reporting conflicting dates)
WEIRD, WACKY, STRANGE, ZANY, ODD, BIZARRE, QUIRKY, UNUSUAL HOLIDAYS!
THERE ARE ONLY
158 SHOPPING DAYS UNTIL CHRISTMAS.

Today is NATIONAL MONOSODIUM GLUTAMATE DAY. ***I hear they’re planning a tasteful celebration.

Today is LORD OF THE RINGS DAY. “The Fellowship of the Ring,” the first part of J.R.R. Tolkien’s epic, “The Lord of the Rings,” was published on this day in 1954.

Today is SIT UP STRAIGHT DAY. ***Don’t slouch. Make mom proud of you.

Today is NATIONAL GRILLED CHEESE SANDWICH DAY. ***My dad used to make grilled cheese without a grill. He’d make toast, butter the toast, put a piece of cheese between the two slices with the butter facing inward, and then microwave the sandwich for 30-seconds. For some reason, even with the same ingredients, it just didn’t turn out the same. He called it a grilled cheese – but to me, it was more like a micro-nasty-cheese.

Today is STICK YOUR TONGUE OUT DAY.  ***Something I often did to Dad when his back was turned after making me a micro-nasty-cheese.

Today is DEADLY MIST DAY, the day the deadly mist began rolling across the lake in Stephen King’s The Mist. ***You think that’s scary… you should see the fog my dad’s micro-nasty cheese sandwiches bring after lunch!

TODAY IS ALSO…

Flitch Day
National Hot Dog Day
Take Your Poet To Work Week

COMING UP NEXT (Just a list, we are not endorsing the holidays posted below. Find more holidays and link to their websites at BrownieLocks.com)

THURSDAY, JULY 20

Get to Know Your Customers Day
International Cake Day
Moon Day
Space Exploration Day
National Lollipop Day
World Jump Day

FRIDAY, JULY 21

Legal Drinking Age Day
No Pet Store Puppies Day

SATURDAY, JULY 22

Casual Pi Day
Fragile X Awareness Day
National Day of the Cowboy
National Penuche Fudge Day
Rat-catchers Day
Spooners (Spoonerism) Day

SUNDAY, JULY 23

Aunties Day
Gorgeous Grandma Day
Hot Enough For Ya Day
Parents’ Day

MONDAY, JULY 24

Cousins Day
National Drive-Thru Day
National Tequila Day
National Thermal Engineers Day
Tell An Old Joke Day

TUESDAY, JULY 25

Carousel Day or Merry-Go-Round Day
Hire A Veteran Day
Red Shoe Day
Thread The Needle Day
Video Games Day

WEDNESDAY, JULY 26

Americans With Disabilities Day
Aunts and Uncles Day
Bagelfest Day
One Voice

ON THIS DAY

1948: “Our Miss Brooks,” starring Eve Arden, debuted on CBS Radio.

1954: Sun Records in Memphis released it’s first single (Sun 209) by 19-year-old Elvis Presley, “That’s All Right (Mama)” backed with “Blue Moon of Kentucky.” Both tracks featured guitarist Scotty Moore and bass player Bill Black.

1957: American International Pictures released actor Michael Landon’s first feature film, “I Was A Teenage Werewolf.”

1962: Ray Charles’ Modern Sounds in Country and Western Music was certified gold. The LP was on Billboard’s country album chart 101 weeks, including 14 weeks at #1.

1966: Frank Sinatra married actress Mia Farrow at the Sands Hotel in Las Vegas. Mia was 20, Frank was 48.

1974: Juan Henshore drew a one-year suspended sentence in London for shooting pigeons in Trafalgar Square with a bow and arrow. Juan said he hated pigeons.

1985: Christa McAuliffe of New Hampshire was chosen to be the first schoolteacher to ride aboard the space shuttle. McAuliffe and six other crew members died when the Challenger exploded shortly after liftoff.

1986: In Hyannis Port, Massachusetts, 28-year-old Caroline Kennedy married 42-year-old Albert Schlossberg. Her uncle, Senator Ted Kennedy, gave her away.

1992: Paul Lynch set a new world record in London by doing 40,401 pushups in 24 hours.

1993: The Department of Defense announced its “Don’t ask, Don’t tell, Don’t pursue” policy toward homosexuals in the military.

1994: Susan Montgomery blew a record bubble-gum bubble in Fresno, California. It measured 23 inches in diameter.

1995: LaToya Jackson filed for bankruptcy protection.

1999: Desirae, Deanna, and Christopher Diaz became the first triplets to be born live on the World Wide Web. They were delivered by Caesarean section at Good Samaritan Medical Center in Phoenix.

1999: “Weird Al” Yankovic kicked off his “Running With Scissors” tour in Green Bay, Wisconsin.

2003: A 42-year-old Austrian man received the world’s first transplanted tongue at Vienna’s General Hospital. During the 14-hour surgery, doctors removed a malignant tumor and successfully attached the new tongue.

2005: U.S. Appeals Court Judge John Roberts was nominated by U.S. President George Bush to the U.S. Supreme Court, replacing the resigned Sandra Day O’Connor.

TODAY IN CHRISTIAN HISTORY

64: Rome burns and its destruction is blamed on Christians by Nero who then persecutes them.

1662: Death of Blaise Pascal, the renowned French mathematician, scientist and Christian apologist.

1692: Puritan magistrates convict and hang five women for witchcraft in Salem, Massachusetts. By September, 20 people had been executed on charges brought by 15 young girls.

1848: More than 300 men and women assemble in the Wesleyan Chapel at Seneca Falls, New York, for the first formal convention to discuss “the social, civil and religious condition and the rights of women.” The event has been called the birthplace of the women’s rights movement.

1938 – Death of Paul Radar. The former boxer/wrestler became an evangelist, pastored Chicago churches, served as president of the Christian and Missionary Alliance, and pioneered radio ministries.

HOLLYWOOD AND CELEBRITY FIGURE BIRTHDAYS

  • actress (“The Guiding Light”) Rachel Miner 37

  • actor (Doctor Mark Greene on “ER”, The Forgotten, Top Gun) Anthony Edwards 54 (audio clip)

  • actor (“Sunset Beach”, “The Bold & The Beautiful”, “The Young & The Restless”) Peter Barton 61 (audio clip)

BEE-BOP BIRTHDAYS

(Music Artist Birthdays From SongFacts.com)

1925 : Sue Thompson

1932 : Buster Benton

1937 : George Hamilton IV

1941 : Vicki Carr

1944 : Commander Cody

1946 : Alan Gorrie (Average White Band)

1947 : Bernie Leadon (Eagles)

1947 : Brian May (Queen)

1947 : Phil Upchurch

1947 : Keith Godchaux (Grateful Dead)

1952 : Allen Collins (Lynyrd Skynyrd)

1960 : Kevin Haskins (Love & Rockets)

SECRETS OF THE UNIVERSE (Answering questions that have plagued mankind for minutes!)

Does it matter that North is at the top of all maps?

Only until relatively recent times was North at the top of most maps. For several centuries of cartography, East was on top. Or, shall we say, where the sun rose was the most important direction.

NEWS KICKERS

(No news on the weekends. Want a customized audio version, FREE? Email me for more information! )

NEW NEWS KICKERS…

A study has found that the fat in food doesn’t have to be swallowed to have a negative effect on the body.  ***So if you hear a woman say, “If I just look at a piece of fudge it goes right to my hips” – she ain’t lying!

When a Texas couple got engaged at a Garth Brooks concert in Oklahoma City recently, Garth gave them a wedding president — he’s going to pay for their honeymoon.  ***Although I’d be wary of taking the gift.  What kind of honeymoon are you going to get when the guy has friends in low places.

NBC’s long-running reality show “The Biggest Loser” has been canceled.  ***The news comes as a shock to most of America who thought the show went away years ago.

Disney’s new Star Wars-themed land will be called Star Wars: Galaxy’s Edge and will open in Disneyland and Disney World in two years.  ***It’ll be tough to get reservations though, as you’ll need to make them a long time ago in a galaxy far far away.

Amazon is said to be close to rolling out its own messaging app.  ***Because of course they are.  They’re Amazon – next it’ll be an Amazon pacemaker, followed by Amazon tongue studs.

The world’s largest Ferris Wheel is being built in Dubai at more than 600-feet tall.  ***Look, Mom – I can see the sewage treatment plant from here!  “Look at the ocean, dear.”  I am!

A woman taking a selfie at an L.A. art gallery fell and knocked over some exhibits causing $200,000 in damage.  ***But she did look fabulous on Facebook, so it all evens out.

National bridal dress chain Andre Angelo has suddenly closed after 80 years, leaving some brides without dresses they had paid for.  ***Have these people never heard about “a woman scorned?”

Caitlyn Jenner is said to be weighing a run for the U.S. Senate.  ***I am confused.  Caitlyn Jenner might run for Senate, Kid Rock is debating the same, there’s talk of Dwayne “The Rock” Johnson running for President… we’ve got a game show host that IS the President… did I somehow slip into an alternate dimension a few months ago?

Six cars were stolen from people’s driveways on the same night in the Connecticut town of Greenwich. All six cars were unlocked with the keys inside when they were taken from homes Saturday night.  ***Left unlocked with the keys inside?  I’m not going to say you were asking for it but… you were asking for it.

It sucks when the internet goes down. It can be life-altering when it goes down for three weeks. After more than three weeks, Somalia’s internet has returned. It’s estimated it cost the country about $10 million a day. Officials and internet providers attributed the problem to a commercial ship that they said cut an undersea cable.  ***Three weeks without internet!  I’d be rolled up in a ball in a dark corner of the basement drooling over myself, repeatedly mumbling “the world is gone… the world is gone…”

Pocket-sized flamethrowers are being marketed to women in China as an “anti-pervert weapon”. The handheld devices, which are capable of hurling a stream of fire about two feet long, sell for up to $40. The mini flamethrowers have sparked controversy in China. One newspaper wrote: “Of course perverts are scary, but what’s even more scary are these anti-pervert devices.”  ***Even if you know the woman, I wouldn’t want to sneak up on her and startle her.  I’d rule out surprise parties too.

Scientists say that 70 years after the U.S. tested nuclear bomb after nuclear bomb on land in the Pacific known as Bikini Atoll the wildlife there is doing remarkably well and flourishing.  ***The only difference they’ve noticed is that the animals are a bit larger and often desire to attack Tokyo.

NEWS KICKER EVERGREENS…

A study conducted at the University of Dusseldorf in Germany has concluded that young women are better able to cope with stress than young men. ***That shouldn’t be all that surprising seeing as the main cause of stress in young men IS young women.

Researchers say men who marry intelligent women are less likely to develop dementia later in life.  ***Poor, poor Kanye.

Sadly, there are now more overweight people in the world than underweight people.  ***Which means we are all now average-sized, and it is YOU that are the morbidly-skinny freaks.

Watching less TV has a double benefit: You exercise more and also reduce your unhealthy sedentary time, slashing your risk of cardiovascular disease. Australian scientists found that when inactive people adopted an exercise routine that took two and a half to five hours a week, they ended up watching about 50 fewer minutes of TV a day. Any reduction in viewing time is a positive: Watching more than two hours of television a day has been shown in other research to increase heart disease risk by 125 percent. Here is another great way to downgrade the danger of being a couch vegetable: During the commercials, do 30 seconds each of jumping jacks, mountain climbers, and skate hops, without resting between moves. ***Riiiiiiight…. like THAT’S gonna happen!

Indian cattle are getting individual identity cards to prevent cattle rustling. Authorities in West Bengal say cows and bulls are often stolen then smuggled into Bangladesh. ***Most of the cows fainted though at the sight of their new ID’s leather carrying case.

AS THE JUNGLE TURNS

CLICK HERE TO DOWNLOAD WEDNESDAY’S EPISODE

OPEN: And now, FancyMonkey.com, (Show Name), and (Station Call Letters) bring you As the Jungle Turns! When last we left the jungle, Gruffy Bear and Sully the Aardvark were about to go head to head in their regular checkers match… and it sounds as if they don’t pull any punches when it comes to playing the game or even trying to intimidate each other before the game begins!

CLOSE: Can’t miss them? I don’t even know what Gruffy is TALKING about! I don’t think I could follow those directions if they were printed out through MapQuest and fed into a GPS system! And who is this new guy… Grizz? We’ll find out next time, As the Jungle Turns!

***You may simulcast “As the Jungle Turns” on the Internet stream of your live broadcast only. Any other Internet use of “As the Jungle Turns” in whole or part including podcasting of your live broadcast is a violation of copyright law. Thank you for your cooperation on this vitally important issue. If you have any questions, please e-mail us and ask about “Jungle Jam & Friends the Radio Show” usage.

MOMENT OF DUH

Who would take their garbage and dump it on the highway when they have a garbage service to pick it up at their own driveway?  A true inDUHvidual, that’s who!

73-year-old retired obstetrician Parviz “Peter” Modaber was ordered by a judge to just stay out of Clarke County, Virginia. This was following his fourth conviction for taking bags of garbage from his home near Charles Town, West Virginia, and dumping them along a highway in Clarke County. Incidentally, court records showed that Dr. Modaber had done this many more than four times. His attorney explained that the good doctor held an intense grudge against the state for having suspended his license during the 1980’s and Clarke County just happened to be near his home. Dr. Modaber had been sentenced three times to a total of 540 hours of picking up litter, but a vigilant citizen caught him dumping yet again less than six months after the third conviction.

TOP TEN

TOP TEN SIGNS YOU MIGHT BE BAPTIST…

10. You have never sung the third verse of any hymn.

9. You think that someone who says “amen” while the pastor is preaching is charismatic.

8. You complain because your pastor only works one day a week and then “he works too long.”

7. You clapped in church last Sunday and felt guilty all week.

6. You woke up craving fried chicken, mashed potatoes and green beans and interpreted it as a “call” to preach.

5. You’re old enough to get senior citizen discounts, but not old enough to be promoted into the senior adult dept.

4. You think John the Baptist founded the Southern Baptist Convention.

3. You think God’s presence is always strongest in the last three pews.

2. You honestly believe the Apostle Paul spoke King James English.

1. You believe you are supposed to take a covered dish to heaven.

THE FILES OF LAW & DISORDER

Trashing an elevator isn’t a very bright idea — especially if you’re inside it.

FILE #1: Authorities in Norway report two young men smashed up a train station elevator.  But the elevator got a bit of pay-back. The doors wouldn’t open and the vandals were trapped in it until police arrived. An official with the National Rail Administration says they got what was coming to them. The two guys in their early 20’s now face criminal charges and a repair bill.

FILE #2: A thief robbed a jewelry store in a Utah town, not realizing he was surrounded by motorcycle cops having an international convention. Several off-duty officers washing their bikes heard the street vendor’s cries for help and set off in pursuit. The first to catch him on her motorcycle was Officer Louann Hamblin, from VanBuren Township in Michigan. She knocked him into a wall, handcuffed him and waited for local police officers to arrive to take him away.

FILE #3: The F-B-I says five men kicked off an Amtrak train had 700-thousand-dollars in U-S Saving Bonds, apparently stolen from a Nevada home. According to investigators, the five were taking the train to Chicago from Sacramento, California, to launder the bonds, when they were busted. They’ve been charged in federal court with crimes including possessing stolen securities.  And they probably would’ve gotten away… had they not been smoking pot on the train.

STRANGE LAW: You may not tap your feet, nod your head, or in any way keep time to the music in a New Hampshire tavern, restaurant, or cafe.

THIS IS YOUR BRAIN ON DRUGS

If a police officer hits on your wife, should you then hit the police officer?

McCory J. Slemmons of Davenport, Iowa, was charged with assault while displaying a dangerous weapon and public intoxication. A detective was monitoring an area where officers were looking for a robbery suspect early Wednesday morning when Slemmons approached him and accused the detective of “looking at his wife”. Slemmons then challenged the detective to a fight and pulled out nunchuks. The detective arrested Slemmons, who later admitted during a police interview that had been drinking.

PHONER PHUN

What movies have you seen this summer that you were sorely disappointed in?

BIBLE BRAIN BUSTER!

QUESTION: Who had a dream about birds eating from a basket on his head?
ANSWER: Pharaoh’s baker (Genesis 40:16-17)

QUESTION IMPOSSIBLE

QUESTION: What are the names of Barbie’s parents?

ANSWER: George and Margaret.

TRUE OR FALSE

Pay attention! If our next player doesn’t answer all ten T/F questions correctly we start all over from question #1! First person to answer question #10 correctly is our winner!

1. The world’s largest four-faced is England’s “Big Ben.” (False – the largest four-faced clock sits atop the Allen-Bradley plant in Milwaukee, Wisconsin.)

2. Almonds are members of the peach family. (True)

3. The first video ever played on MTV Europe was “Video Killed the Radio Star”. (False – it was “Money For Nothing” by Dire Straits)

4. If you add up the numbers 1-100 consecutively (1+2+3+4+5 etc) the total is exactly 10,000. (False – it’s 5,050)

5. The man who was the voice of Tony the Tiger also sang the song, “Your a Mean One, Mr. Grinch” in the Dr. Seuss Christmas special. (True)

6. The famous split-fingered Vulcan salute from Star Trek is actually a Jewish sign. (True. It is intended to represent the first letter “shin,” pronounced “sheen” of the word “shalom.” As a small boy, Leonard Nimoy observed his rabbi using it in a benediction and never forgot it; eventually he was able to add it to “Star Trek” lore.)

7. The symbol on the “pound” key (#) is called an octothorpe. (True)

8. The Chinese invented firearms. (False. While the Chinese invented gunpowder, they were not the first to develop firearms.)

9. Revolvers cannot be fitted for silencers. (True – due to all the noisy gasses which escape the cylinder gap at the rear of the barrel.)

10. The term “the whole 9 yards” came from NFL football. (False – it came from WWII fighter pilots in the South Pacific. When arming their airplanes on the ground, the .50 caliber machine gun ammo belts measured exactly 27 feet, before being loaded into the fuselage. If the pilots fired all their ammo at a target, it got “the whole 9 yards.”)

TABLOID MATCH GAME

You have to match the blank in the tabloid headline with the word or phrase that has been removed!

“Zoo Lets Visitors Play Tug of War With _______” (Lions and Tigers)

Despite the dangers, the Houston Zoo allows visitors to play “tug of war” with its own lions and tigers. A 20-pound slab of meat, attached to a long rope, is tossed into the enclosure, and visitors are encouraged to toy with the cats by yanking on the rope as the animal lunges for it. Zookeepers say it keeps the animals from getting bored.

THE WAY TOO EARLY IN THE MORNING TO UNDERSTAND THE PUNCHLINE EVEN AFTER TWO CUPS OF COFFEE JOKE OF THE DAY 

JOKE #1

An atheist professor was teaching a college class and he told the class that he was going to prove that there was no God. He said, “God if you are real, then I want you to knock me off this platform. I’ll give you 15 minutes!”

Ten minutes went by. He kept taunting God, saying, “Here I am God, I’m still waiting.” He got down to the last couple of minutes and a big 240-pound football player happened to walk by the door and heard what the professor said. The football player walked into the classroom and in the last minute, hit the professor full force, sending him flying off the platform.

The professor got up, obviously shaken, and said, “Where did you come from, and why did you do that?”

The football player replied, “God sent me!”

JOKE #2

Having just completed my training as the hospital’s switch-board operator, I was reasonably confident that I knew all the codes for emergencies:

Code Blue for cardiac arrest, Code Red for fire, etc.

My first night on the job alone, however, a nurse phoned and asked me to page a “Code Brown, Room 214.”

I had no idea what that was.  I called the page, then searched frantically through my emergency manual, but I couldn’t find any description of it anywhere.

Stumped, I finally called the nurse back and asked her about it.

“Relax,” laughed the nurse.   “Code Brown is what we page when a patient is discharged and leaves behind an unfinished box of chocolates!”

JOKE #3

Husband: I know you are having a lot of trouble with the baby, Dear, but keep in mind, “the hand that rocks the cradle is the hand that rules the world.”

Wife: How about taking over the world for a few hours while I go shopping…?

USELESS FACTS

A study has found that fish in Washington’s Spokane River have an extremely high concentration of toxic flame retardants. ***You can still catch the fish but you’ll have a heck of a time trying to fry one.

Some restaurants in Britain are forcing customers who like their meat rare to sign a disclaimer form before eating due to fears of the risk of E-coli and salmonella poisoning. ***We have a similar disclaimer next to the radio station’s coffee-maker.

FEATURED FUNNIES

“Sister Repair”

My sister has the courage, but not always the skills, to tackle any home repair project.

For example, in her garage are pieces of a lawn mower she once tried to fix. So I wasn’t surprised the day my other sister, Pam, and I found our sister attacking her vacuum cleaner with a screwdriver.

“I can’t get this thing to cooperate,” she explained when she saw us.

Pam suggested, “Why don’t you drag it out to the garage and show it the lawn mower?”

IT MUST BE TRUE BECAUSE I HEARD IT ON THE RADIO!

Here’s a sad statement about America.

Virtually every town along the 20 miles of the Long Beach Island seashore in New Jersey has signs warning beach lovers of the dangers of rip tides. However, Long Beach Township itself does not. This, even though experts say that most summer visitors are ignorant of the powerful currents and how to cope with them. Township Attorney Richard Shackleton explained that posting such helpful warnings may actually hurt local taxpayers. Why? Well legally speaking, a town generally is under no obligation to warn swimmers of natural conditions, but Mr. Shackleton explained that once a town attempts to warn, judges and juries will too often find the warnings inadequate and award a swimmer or his survivors huge damages. ***MARLAR: In other words, they’d rather you die than sue them.  That’s nice.

INSPIRATIONAL INSPIRATION

DO NOT…

  • Do not undermine your worth by comparing yourself with others. It is because we are different that each of us is special.

  • Do not set your goals by what other people deem important. Only you know what is best for you.

  • Do not take for granted the things closest to your heart. Cling to them as you would your life, for without them, life is meaningless.

  • Do not let your life slip through your fingers by living in the past nor for the future. By living your life one day at a time, you live all the days of your life

  • Do not give up when you still have something to give. Nothing is really over until the moment you stop trying. It is a fragile thread that binds us to each other.

  • Do not be afraid to encounter risks. It is by taking chances that we learn how to be brave.

  • Do not shut love out of your life by saying it is impossible to find.

  • The quickest way to receive love is to give love; The fastest way to lose love is to hold it too tightly.

  • Do not dismiss your dreams. To be without dreams is to be without hope; To be without hope is to be without purpose.

  • Do not run through life so fast that you forget not only where you have been, but also where you are going.

DRIVE TIME DEVOTIONAL

FAMILY TIE

Read: Ephesians 2:11-22

The whole building, being fitted together, grows into a holy temple in the Lord. —Ephesians 2:21

An elderly man who visited an art gallery was deeply moved by a painting that portrayed Christ on the cross. It was so realistic in depicting the suffering of the Savior that his heart was filled with gratitude for the great price the Lord Jesus paid for his redemption. With tears trickling down his cheeks, he exclaimed, “Bless Him! I love Him! I love Him!”

Other visitors standing nearby wondered what the man was talking about. One person walked over and looked at the painting. Soon he too felt deep emotion welling up in his heart. Turning to the old man, he gave him a firm handshake and said, “So do I! I love Him too!”The scene was repeated as a third man and then a fourth walked over, gazed at the painting, and exclaimed, “I love Him too!”Although these men were from different churches, they felt a common bond because of their faith in Christ.

As believers, we need an awareness of our spiritual unity with other Christians. We need to focus on the fundamentals on which we agree—such as our love for the Savior who died for us—rather than bicker about lesser issues.

Regardless of sincere disagreements, we as blood-bought believers should recognize that we have a strong family tie in Christ. —Richard De Haan

Blest be the tie that binds
Our hearts in Christian love!
The fellowship of kindred minds
Is like to that above. —Fawcett

As we draw near to Christ we are drawn near to each other.

LEFTOVERS

EXPLODING TOILET
While sitting in a restaurant, it’s not exactly what you want to hear – an explosion coming from the bathroom!

…Two men from Milwaukee were injured when they tried to flush an explosive device down a toilet and it exploded. The device blew up in the ladies’ room at Zorba’s Restaurant, injuring the two men as they attempted to run off. As it exploded, the toilet sent pieces of porcelain flying everywhere. The two men, who were both hospitalized with injuries, were arrested and charged with endangering safety and criminal damage to property. ***MARLAR: After hearing the explosion in the bathroom, I’d be asking what those guys ate – so I could avoid ordering it.

LIFE… LIVE IT

Want to increase the chances of getting your wallet or purse back if you lose it?  Put some baby pictures in there!

Strangers are more likely to return lost wallets containing photos of cute babies, according to British researchers. The scientists dropped 240 wallets across Edinburgh with pictures of either a smiling baby, a puppy, a “happy family,” or a “contended elderly couple.” It turns out nobody cares about your pooch, retired parents, or smugly superior family life. But that cute little baby? Apparently it triggers a “compassionate instinct towards vulnerable infants”.  When faced with the photograph of the baby, people were far more likely to send the wallet back. In fact, only one in ten were hard-hearted enough not to do so. With no picture to tug at the emotions, just one in seven were sent back.  According to Dr Wiseman, “”The baby kicked off a caring feeling in people, which is not surprising.”  Who knew wallet photos could be so useful?

JUST FOR FUN

PAIN IN THE NECK
A lady from England is suing the government because she hurt her neck on the job. Sort of.

…Well, not exactly on the job. She says she developed the neck pain when filling out the required forms for her application for a pay raise! The lady claims she spent 11 hours filling out the seven page form and it caused her severe neck pain. She’s seeking about $3,000 in the lawsuit. ***MARLAR: Sounds like this woman’s employer also has a little pain in the neck to deal with.

FUN LIST

TOP FIVE SIGNS THAT YOUR BOSS DOESN’T LIKE YOU

  • He asks you to step outside for a moment and you’re on a submarine

  • He invites you to stop by his office and pick up something that rhymes with “mink’s lip”

  • Wants to know if you’d be interested in the company’s new Baghdad office

  • At the company picnic, tries to convince you that everybody else’s dunk tanks also have piranha in them.

  • Has your picture in the front lobby along with a sign that says, “Need a hostage?”

MORE SHOW PREP STUFF…

REMEMBER ME

He could remember her smile, her hair and the first day they met in the early 1940s. But it took Ralph Dial more than 60 years to remember her name. It finally came to him while driving during Christmastime in 2002. He tracked her down by going through old newspapers in Knoxville, Tennessee. He found her name on a letter to the editor. He called the Knoxville News Sentinel and the editorial department contacted Vinita Anderson on Dial’s behalf. She called him a few minutes later. She only lived 30 miles away. They were both widowed, so they continued their conversation over dinner — and four years later, Dial asked for Anderson’s hand in marriage.  They married March 17th, 2007 — the same day they became engaged the year before.  ***MARLAR: If it took him sixty years to remember his true love’s name, what do you think the chances are that he’ll remember his wedding anniversary each year?

OTHER STUFF I WANT TO CRAM INTO TODAY’S PREP

Is your kitchen tidy and clean or cluttered and messy? It’s an important question to ask because if your kitchen is a disorganized mess, it could be making you fat. People who have chaotic kitchens often experience out-of-control stressful feelings that increase their desire to snack on indulgent treats, according to researchers at Cornell University. Translation: Kitchen mayhem can be diet killer. A study found that the women who felt more stress consumed twice as many cookies in a messy kitchen compared with those in the quiet, organized space. When a kitchen feels disruptive and disorganized, it influences how much we eat. “We found the more cluttered and confusing an environment was, the more people ate,” says co-author Brian Wansink. “It made them anxious, and when they got anxious, they ended up eating more cookies.” But the news is not all discouraging for those with a less-than-tidy kitchen space: A relaxed mindset can help reduce the pressure to overeat, counteracting the influence of a chaotic space.

It’s only human to wonder how long you have to be on this Earth. British researchers say the answer may be as close as your parents. If your parents lived to be in their 70s, you and your siblings are far less likely to die of heart disease — the number one killer — in your 70s. A study found that for each parent who lived beyond 70 years of age, their children had a 20 percent lower chance of dying from heart disease. In addition, these children had lower rates of vascular disease, heart failure, stroke, high blood pressure and high cholesterol. The link between parents who lived past age 70 and their heart-healthier children held even after the researchers adjusted the findings for such factors as education, age, weight and physical activity. What does this mean for you? If your parents lived to be in their 80s or 90s, you do not have permission to turn into a couch potato who stuffs himself with chips and ice cream. On the other hand, if your parents died at a young age, you can help reverse that family trend by caring for your health with regular exercise and a heart-healthy diet.

Raising a small child can truly test your patience, as kids are notorious for bombarding parents with random stories and never-ending impromptu monologues. As much as you love your boogery little ones, it would be so awesome to get through a single conversation without a million and one interruptions, right?  Thankfully, we have parents like Jessica Martin-Weber, whose simple trick to get her kids to stop interrupting her is the blessing that keeps on giving. As this mom notes in a post shared on her Beyond Moi Facebook page, it’s the “breakthrough” she and her husband have been desperately waiting for. “We tried teaching ‘excuse me please’ or just ‘excuse me,’ but they just repeated that louder and louder too,” she says. After trying different methods — along with a few “deep breathing exercises” to keep her sanity intact — Jessica says teaching her children to touch her arm when they have something to say was the trick that finally stuck. Martin-Weber writes in her Facebook post: “In order to help with this and respect our personal boundaries and limits, we have taught our children to demonstrate when they have something to share by gently laying a hand on our arm if we are speaking or listening to someone else at that moment. So they know we’re aware they want to say something, we physically respond in some way such as putting our hand over their hand or gently touching their back or holding their hand.” And guess what? It totally works. (thestir.cafemom.com)

Could Emoji at School Help Language Skills?
Using smiley face, poo and broken heart emoji at school may sound like a strange idea but it could improve children’s language skills according to at least one expert. Vyvyan Evans, a former professor of linguistics at Bangor University, has a new book called The Emoji Code and says that if emoji were part of regular school lessons they would stimulate something we don’t at the moment. He added, “Emojis are actually making us more effective communicators in the digital communication space because they’re filling in something that’s actually missing… the non-verbal cues that tell us how the message should be interpreted.” So if he gets his way kids could soon be putting a thumbs up at the end of their sentences and not getting in trouble for it. (Metro)

AND I LEAVE YOU WITH THIS THOUGHT

There are two things to aim at in life: first, to get what you want; and, after that, to enjoy it. Only the wisest of mankind achieve the second. – Logan Pearsall Smith

THE TICKET Movie Reviews with MARIE ASNER

Marie Asner has been reviewing films for over 35 years. Her outlets include radio, print and Internet. For more in-depth movie reviews of the following films, visit www.Tollbooth.org. Ratings from 1 (Low) to 5 (High).

JULY 14, 2017…

Wish Upon—Joey King is a teenager with a sad heart. Her mother has died. How to handle this? She discovers a music box, but it is no ordinary music box. It can grant wishes. Of course, there is always a price to pay. “Wish Upon” is rated PG 13. No rating.

To The Bone—Keanu Reeves has played many screen roles, and this time, he is a therapist who helps anorectic patients. In particular, Lily Collins, who definitely has a problem and ends up in his program. “To The Bone” is rated PG 13. Rating of 2 for fans.

War For The Planet Of The Apes—Caesar, the intelligent ape (played by Andy Serkis) is the leader of the group and they certainly are ready for battle against humans and especially, Woody Harrelson, as the leader of the humans. This film is set two years after “Dawn of the Planet of the Apes.” Who to trust? New characters are a little human girl, Nova (Amiah Miller) and a teenage ape who is all trouble (Steve Zahn.) “War For The Planet Of The Apes” is rated PG 13. Rating of 2 for fans.

Lady Macbeth (opening in select cities) —This adaptation of a Shakespeare play goes the route of a novella from 1865 by Nikolai Leskov called “Lady Macbeth of The Mtsensk District.” Now, director William Oldroyd, has taken the story and set it in 19th century Great Britain. The plot centers on Katherine, played by  Florence Pugh (“The Falling“), who is in a dull and boring marriage without love. This is a lady could meet Hannibal Lector and calmly serve him a cup of tea. The word “scruples” is not in her vocabulary. Katherine is married to Alexander (Paul Hilton), and his father is Boris (Christopher Fairbank  from “Guardians of the Galaxy” and television’s “Wolf Hall’). This is a stern life, and Katherine begins to look favorably on the farm hand, Cosmo Jarvis, Hmm. This farm is a bed of intrigue. The household has a maid, too, Anna (Naomi Cukie.) A horror-style film does not have to have monsters crawling out of the woodwork. “Lady Macbeth” is rated R. An adult film. Rating of 2.

JULY 21, 2017…

Dunkirk is a war film about WWII and the evacuation of Dunkirk. Stars Tom Hardy.

Landline centers on two sisters who decide to spy on their father to see if he is having an affair. Stars Edie Falco.

First Kill concerns a robbery, a kidnapping and a witness to a crime. Stars Hayden Christiansen.

Girls Trip stars Jada Pinkett Smith, Queen Latifah, Regina Hall and Tiffany Haddish as friends who try to bond again.

Valerian and the City of a Thousand Planets is directed by Luc Besson and a sci-fi film about life on a space station 18 miles across.

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Darren Marlar credits all non-original material to the author whenever possible. All other material is original, used with permission, or author unknown. We welcome all comments, questions, and suggestions. Darren can be reached via his website at www.DarrenMarlar.com.