July 27, 2015: Monday ONAIRprep

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Okay, gang, it’s “The (Jock) Program,” so turn up your tweeters and we’ll pop your earpuscles.




“In Him we have redemption through his blood, the forgiveness of sins, in accordance with the riches of God’s grace…”  –Ephesians 1:7


Jesus said, “Let the little children come to me, and do not hinder them for the kingdom of heaven belongs to such as these.” — Matthew 19:14




He gives strength to the weary and increases the power of the weak. — Isaiah 40:29


Thought: Even the most pumped up and positive ones of us find ourselves broken and weary at some point in our life. It isn’t so hard to believe and follow Jesus when we are soaring on the wings of eagles or running and not getting weary in our walk with God. Often the toughest time to keep our faith vibrant is when we are trying to keep putting one foot in front of the other while not fainting. In those moments of absolute powerlessness, weakness, and brokenness the Lord is often most real, most powerful, and most present.


Prayer: Thank you, God, for sustaining me and keeping my faith alive when I have been under attack from the Evil One and have grown weary with the challenges and hardships of life. Please give those I love, and mention now by name, the strength to press on even though they are weary and weak. Please be real in their lives and let them know that you are coming with grace to help and redeem as their Great Deliverer. In Jesus’ name I ask it. Amen.


The Thoughts and Prayers for Today’s Verse are written by Phil Ware. You can email questions or comments to phil@heartlight.org.




The chapter and verse corresponds to the month and the day!

Luke 7:27 NIV = This is the one about whom it is written: “’I will send my messenger ahead of you, who will prepare your way before you.’




(NOTE: Some holidays may be duplicated due to various calendars reporting conflicting dates)


Tonight is OVER THE MOON NIGHT, the night each year when legend says cows get really jumpy.  ***MARLAR: The weird part is when the dog laughs after watching the cow, and the dinnerware runs off for no apparent reason.


This is NO SMOKING DAY. On this day in 1965 President Lyndon Johnson signed legislation requiring cigarette packages and ads to display a health warning from the U.S. Surgeon General.  ***MARLAR: Good thing, too!  Before that people had no idea that sucking thick black smoke into your lungs might be bad for you!


Today is FORM A COMPANY QUARTET DAY, a day to find co-workers who like to sing.  ***MARLAR: Or you can take the safe route and pay them not to do so.


Today is TAKE YOUR HOUSEPLANTS FOR A WALK DAY.  ***MARLAR: Don’t forget the leash – you don’t want your ferns running out into traffic.


This is WALK ON STILTS DAY. ***MARLAR: Try doing it while carrying your houseplant!




Barbie-in-a-Blender Day

National Korean War Veterans Armistice Day

Take Your Houseplant For a Walk Day

Walk on Stilts Day





Buffalo Soldiers Day

National Milk Chocolate Day

World Hepatitis Day



Lasagna Day

National Chicken Wing Day

Rain Day



Cheesecake Day

Father-in-Law Day

Friendship Day

Health Care Now! (Medicare’s Birthday)

International Day of Friendship

National Support Public Education Day

Paperback Book Day

National Chili Dog Day



National Talk in an Elevator Day

System Administrator Appreciation Day

Uncommon Instruments Awareness Day

World Ranger Day



Girlfriend’s Day

India Pale Ale Beer Day

Mead Day

National Minority Donor Awareness Day

National Mustard Day

Respect For Parents

Rounds Resounding Day

Sandcastle Day

Spider-Man Day

US Air Force Day

World Lung Cancer Day

World Wide Web Day

World Scout Scarf Day



Friendship Day

National Doll Day

National Kids’ Day

Sister’s Day

Take a Penny/Leave a Penny Day



Assistance Dog Day

Friendship Day

National Psychic Day

Watermelon Day




1921: Scientists at the University of Toronto isolated the drug insulin for the first time.


1940: Bugs Bunny debuted in the movie cartoon A Wild Hare. Artist Bob Clampett created Bugs after seeing actor Clark Gable munching a carrot in the movie It Happened One Night.


1953: Steve Allen debuted as a local television talk show host on WNBC-TV in New York City.


1965: President Lyndon Johnson signed legislation requiring cigarette packages and ads to display a health warning from the U.S. Surgeon General.


1974: A House Committee voted to impeach President Richard Nixon.


1974: British guitarist Eric Clapton’s first solo single entered the British music charts — “I Shot the Sheriff.”


1974: John Denver’s “Annie’s Song” reached #1 in the U.S.


1974: NBC dropped its daytime program Dinah’s Place, ending NBC’s 23-year association with singer Dinah Shore.


1992: Reggie Lewis of the Boston Celtics collapsed and died during practice on a Brandeis University basketball court. He was 27.


1994: When Cindy Hartman’s phone rang in the middle of the night in Conway, Arkansas, she discovered an armed burglar ransacking her home. She fell to her knees and asked if she could pray for him. The burglar broke down, joined her in prayer, and apologized. He brought her belongings back into the house, borrowed a shirt to wipe away his fingerprints, and left his gun behind when he drove away.


1998: A 31-year-old man in Paola, Kansas, pleaded guilty to two counts of aggravated indecent liberties with a child after one of the two girls he molested saw him on the TV game show “Wheel of Fortune.” He won $4,400 and was arrested a few days later.


1999: An Icelandic advertising man proposed to his girlfriend in a prime-time TV commercial. The 30-second proposal cost him $900, but it was worth it — she said yes.


2001: Sylvester Neal of Anchorage, Alaska, began cashing in his 30-year collection of almost a million and a half pennies, some $14,000 in coins that weighed five tons. Fortunately, the local coin-machine company, CoinStar, offered to pick them up.


2001: A new law in North Carolina banned swearing in the presence of dead bodies. The law, intended to foster respect for the dead and bereaved, also sets out how corpses should be transported. The law was prompted after some bodies were carried in the back of an open pick-up truck.


2003: Comedian Bob Hope died in Toluca Lake, California, at age 100.


2006: His Swiss-based team announced that American Floyd Landis, who won the Tour de France cycling classic, tested positive for high levels of testosterone, a banned steroid.




1681: During a bitter battle between Scottish Episcopalians and Presbyterians, five Presbyterian preachers are martyred in Edinburgh. The Church of Scotland became Presbyterian permanently in 1690.




  • actor (Mission Impossible 3, Vanity Fair, Alexander) Jonathan Ryhs Meyers 38
  • actor (“Yes Dear”, Assistant Coach Luther Horatio Van Dam on “Coach”, former spokesperson for Big Lots) Jerry Van Dyke 84 (




(Music Artist Birthdays From SongFacts.com)

1922 : Bob Thiele

1927 : Bob Morse (The Hi-Los)

1929 : Harvey Fuqua (The Moonglows)

1933 : Nick Reynolds (The Kingston Trio)

1943 : Al Ramsey (Gary Lewis and the Playboys)

1944 : Bobby Gentry

1947 : Andy McMaster (The Motors)

1949 : Maureen McGovern

1950 : Michael Vaughn (Paper Lace)

1962 : Karl Mueller (Soul Asylum)

1967 : Juliana Hatfield




Why do we sometimes call a spider’s web a cobweb?

Fancy the spider, whose rather obsessive web building has provided us with the metaphor that describes the most powerful electronic communications network ever. Of course, we surf while spiders spin, although like the spider we are also trying to catch something with our web, whether it’s the news, stock prices, or just another useless fact. Yet although we find plenty of corny jokes on our web, we certainly don’t “cob”: why does the spider? Cobweb was spun out from the Anglo-Saxon word, attercoppes, which means, “poison head.” By the Middle Ages they were abbreviating that to “cop” and calling its product a copweb. Finally it became easier to pronounce as cobweb.




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Citizenway’s Ben Blascoe says he likes the feel of his wedding ring on his finger. Ben confessed that he wore his wedding band at the mall after picking up the rings from the jeweler…a week before the wedding. Ben said: I liked the way it felt, still do. He and his wife just celebrated their 10th anniversary.


DC Talk will soon release their album Supernatural on white vinyl. The two LP project is available for pre-order right now. They say it will probably ship in November.


We now have another thing to be Thankful for during the holidays. Kutless is currently working on their next CD and guitarist James Mead this week announced that it will probably come out around Thanksgiving.


Another Wellness post from Plumb. She is working to lose weight and has invited her social media followers to join her. Plumb announced this week that she was down 2.2 pounds to 138.2 from 140.4 after one week.


The music organization ASCAP recently hosted its 28th annual Rhythm & Soul Music Awards and Mercyme’s Bart Millard came away with one of the awards. Bart was honored with the award for Top Gospel Song for “I Can Only Imagine,” as performed by Tamela Mann.


Kari Jobe says her husband Cody is on a mission. The couple travels on tour together and she says Cody is determined to find a good travel pillow. So far, though, Kari says it’s still a work in process. She shared a picture of his 3rd attempt this week but said the third time is not the charm and pillow number three is still not working.


The members of For King and County have impacted thousands through their music. But at a recent concert is was Joel and Luke who were being impacted. They shared a picture of a three year old girl who has overcome cancer twice in her short life. She was being held by her Mom and had her hands in the air singing along with the For King and Country song Shoulders. The members of the band wrote: So deeply impacted to see images like this and to be a small part of your life’s journey!




Drunk man who jumped in lake to avoid rescuers sent to trial
LEVITTOWN, Pa. (AP) — A district judge says a drunken-driving suspect who ran naked from a hospital and jumped into an eastern Pennsylvania lake must stand trial for disorderly conduct and other charges. The defense attorney for 29-year-old Gregory Morten, of New Hope, argued Thursday that…


Man leaves dead rattlesnake on Arizona police memorial    photo
COTTONWOOD, Ariz. (AP) — A 23-year-old man thought it would be funny to put a dead rattlesnake on a northern Arizona police memorial, but authorities were not amused. Nathan Cody Cumiford, of Cottonwood, was arrested Monday and faces a misdemeanor littering charge. He was released on his own…
BLM: Idaho cyclist sparks fire by burning used toilet paper
BOISE, Idaho (AP) — Authorities say a cyclist started a 73-acre wildfire in southwest Idaho by lighting his toilet paper on fire after taking a comfort break. U.S. Bureau of Land Management officials say the cyclist stopped to defecate in a ravine in the Boise foothills on Wednesday…
Maine fisherman finds bright orange lobster; his 2nd rarity    photo
RAYMOND, Maine (AP) — A Maine lobsterman has caught a rare bright orange lobster, the second time he’s pulled an odd-colored crustacean from state waters. HASH(0x14139e0) Robert Bayer, executive director of The Lobster Institute at the University of Maine, says the odds of catching an orange…
Half-naked ‘Spartans’ attract attention of Beijing police    photo
BEIJING (AP) — A salad store paraded dozens of half-naked Western men dressed as Spartans through China’s capital as a publicity stunt, causing a stir and drawing a crackdown by police who were photographed restraining some of them on the ground. About 40 mostly blond and brown-haired men…
Milwaukee man shoots dog, mistaking it for reported lion
MILWAUKEE (AP) — A man who thought he spotted a lion that people have reported seeing wandering on Milwaukee’s north side has shot and injured a large pit bull. Police say the dog, which was shot Tuesday night, is being cared for at the Milwaukee Area Domestic Animal Control Commission. The…
560-pound man biking across US to lose weight    photo
TIVERTON, R.I. (AP) — A 560-pound man biking across the United States to lose weight hit a snag in Rhode Island. HASH(0x13d81b0) Newport Bicycle is outfitting Hites with a new bike that can withstand his weight. In two weeks on the road, the 40-year-old says he’s lost 60 pounds. Hites, who…
Craigslist founder gives group $10,000 for composting toilet
MORRISTOWN, N.J. (AP) — The founder of Craigslist has donated $10,000 for a composting toilet that will be named in his honor by a northern New Jersey organization. Grow It Green Morristown says Craig Newmark’s donation will likely cover the purchase of the toilet for the group’s Early Street…
Maine brewer makes beer out of live lobsters, sea salt    photo
PORTLAND, Maine (AP) — A Maine brewer is offering a quicker way to consume two of the state’s summertime staples: beer and lobster. Oxbow Brewing is serving up beer brewed with live Maine lobsters and a dash of sea salt. Brewmaster Tim Adams says the lobsters were placed in a mesh bag and…
Police: Man hid under bed for 3 days at ex-girlfriend’s home
SPOTSWOOD, N.J. (AP) — A man who police say sneaked into a central New Jersey home and hid under a bed for three days before he was found was the ex-boyfriend of the homeowners’ daughter. Spotswood police announced late Tuesday that Jason Hubbard was charged with burglary in the incident,…
Police: Man drove drunk, carried box of beer on lawn tractor
WASHINGTONVILLE, Pa. (AP) — State troopers say they had to use a rope to corral a man who was driving drunk on his lawn mower with a box of beer. HASH(0x13e3650) Police received a call that night about an agitated, mower-driving man making threats. Responding troopers said they could smell…





Lifestyle changes may guard aging brain against memory loss    photo
WASHINGTON (AP) — The latest Alzheimer’s research has a clear theme: Change your lifestyle to protect your brain. It will take several years for scientists to prove whether some experimental drugs could at least delay Alzheimer’s disease, and an aging population is at risk now. Whatever…


EU drug regulator recommends 1st license for malaria shot    photo
LONDON (AP) — The European Medicines Agency is recommending the world’s leading malaria vaccine be licensed even though it is only about 30 percent effective and that protection fades over time. In a statement published on Friday, the agency said it had “adopted a positive scientific opinion”…
Exercise good for brain, even for those with Alzheimer’s    photo
WASHINGTON (AP) — Exercise may do more than keep a healthy brain fit: New research suggests working up a good sweat may also offer some help once memory starts to slide— and even improve life for people with Alzheimer’s. The effects were modest, but a series of studies reported Thursday…
Report details chronic problems at Army anthrax facility
NEW YORK (AP) — Pentagon officials released a report Thursday detailing recurring problems at an Army bioterror facility that accidentally sent live anthrax to other labs for more than a decade. At a press briefing in Washington, military officials said half the lots of anthrax produced at…
India’s ‘Medicine Baba’ gets drugs from rich, gives to poor    photo
NEW DELHI (AP) — Omkarnath spends his days searching New Delhi for drugs. A call to the phone number printed boldly on his saffron-colored tunic reveals his alternate identity: “Hello, I am Medicine Baba.” The chatty, 79-year-old retired blood-bank technician has been collecting unused…
Eli Lilly: Experimental Alzheimer’s drug shows some benefit    photo
WASHINGTON (AP) — Eli Lilly & Co. reported Wednesday that an experimental medication might slow mild Alzheimer’s if people take it early enough, one of a handful of drugs in late-stage testing in the frustrating hunt for a better treatment. The new findings don’t prove that Lilly’s…
House passes bill to prevent mandatory GMO labeling    photo
WASHINGTON (AP) — Food companies would not have to disclose whether their products include genetically modified ingredients under legislation passed by the House Thursday. The House bill is backed by the food industry, which has fought mandatory labeling efforts in several states around the…
5 things from annual check-up for Social Security, Medicare    photo
WASHINGTON (AP) — Looking at the big picture, the financial health of Social Security and Medicare doesn’t appear to have worsened. Wednesday’s annual check-up found that Social Security’s retirement trust fund has enough money to pay full benefits until 2035, a year later than previously…
Lawmakers: VA hid details as budget crisis loomed    photo
WASHINGTON (AP) — Lawmakers from both parties accused the Department of Veterans Affairs Wednesday of hiding details of a budget crisis that could force the shutdown of some VA hospitals next month. The VA said last week it may shutter hospitals unless Congress closes a $2.5 billion shortfall…
Report: Teen use of morning-after pill is climbing    photo
NEW YORK (AP) — More than 1 in 5 sexually active teen girls have used the morning-after pill — a dramatic increase that likely reflects that it’s easier now for teens to buy the emergency contraceptive. A report released Wednesday shows teen use of the morning-after pill rose steadily…
Study: Women with mild memory problem worsen faster than men    photo
WASHINGTON (AP) — Older women with mild memory impairment worsened about twice as fast as men, researchers reported Tuesday, part of an effort to unravel why women are especially hard-hit by Alzheimer’s. Nearly two-thirds of Americans with Alzheimer’s are women. At age 65, seemingly healthy…




(None on the weekends)



Police are investigating after finding a 500 pound pig trapped inside the filthy basement of a Detroit home. The man who lived in the home was found dead in a nearby house last week. Police described the homeowner as a “hoarder.”  ***You know you have a problem when you’re hoarding swine.


The number of words is growing. According to a report in Science magazine, the number of words in the English language has nearly doubled in the past 100 years. Officials say there were 544,000 documented words in 1900. By the year 2000 that total had grown to just over 1-million words.  ***Over half of which are colorful euphemisms not allowed to be said or heard by minors.


NASA last week announced the discovery of Kepler-452b, the most Earth-like planet ever found. According to NBC News, the planet is located 1,400 light-years from our planet. NASA called it “Earth 2.0,” because it’s the first small, rocky planet discovered in the habitable zone of a G star similar to our sun. The $600 million Kepler Space Telescope, which launched in 2009, has also discovered 11 other less notable new planets. The Kepler mission searches for Earth-like planets.  *** (Rachel Dolezal / Shia LaBeouf) was ecstatic to hear they’d finally found his/her home planet.


Scientist Matthew Bailes has been given the assignment of finding signs of alien life on other planets. However, he warns if aliens contact us we should think twice before replying, saying any creature from outer space capable of sending out a signal would more than likely be more intelligent than us.  *** Really?  But WE’RE sending out signals into space – and we’ve shown ourselves to be pretty stupid.




Italian researchers say that contagious yawning occurs at a faster rate among friends and family than strangers. ***MARLAR: Which makes perfect sense – who bores you faster than your own family?  “Grandpa, you’ve told us this story twelve times already… and that’s just tonight…”


According to a study, people with higher incomes report less loneliness.  *** So it looks like most of us are destined to be pretty darned lonely.


A survey found that the average US worker admits to wasting more than two hours a day at the workplace.  *** Gee, that sounds low to me.


It’s not just a people problem: Growing rates of obesity in pets have led to the emergence of fat farms offering “pawlates,” “doga” and “Barko Polo,” doggie versions of Pilates, yoga and Marco Polo to help slim down man’s best friend.  In the U.S., 53 percent of dogs are overweight or obese, up from 45 percent four years ago. In cats, the figure is almost 58 percent, said Dr. Ernie Ward, a veterinarian and founder of the Association of Pet Obesity Prevention in Calabash, North Carolina. Overweight pets can suffer diabetes, joint problems, heart disease and decreased life expectancy, just like obese people, he said.  ***MARLAR: The pet fitness program actually works in two ways – first, it burns calories so your dog can lose fat, plus it’s so expensive that you can’t afford to continue buying food for your dog.








CLICK HERE TO DOWNLOAD TODAY’S EPISODE… Kerri Pomarolli, “Christmas Bargains”




OPEN: And now, FancyMonkey.com, (Show Name), and (Station Call Letters) bring you As the Jungle Turns! When last we left the jungle, all of the jungle animals were lost in the jungle because they all went out to look for Racquet, who was also lost. Racquet went out into the jungle because his crayons were lost and he promised to do a portrait for the Rabbit Family. We now find all of the animals wondering what to do next.


CLOSE: Tune in next time as FancyMonkey.com, (Show Name), and (Station Call Letters) bring you another exciting episode of As the Jungle Turns!




OPEN: And now, FancyMonkey.com, (Show Name), and (Station Call Letters) bring you As the Jungle Turns! When last we left the jungle island of Razzleflabbin, Marvy Snuffelson nailed down the hands on the island’s calendar clock so everyone would think every day was Saturday! Unfortunately, it’s been many, many days of Saturdays. There’s no food, and everyone is at each other’s throats wondering who is to blame!


CLOSE: Now that Marvy has come clean with what he’s done, will Razzleflabbin Island get back to normal? Will Karl stay? Find out next time, As the Jungle Turns!


***You may simulcast “As the Jungle Turns” on the Internet stream of your live broadcast only. Any other Internet use of As the Jungle Turns in whole or part including podcasting of your live broadcast is a violation of copyright law. Thank you for your cooperation on this vitally important issue. If you have any questions, please e-mail us.




A man is literally stuck in a life of crime in today’s Moment of Duh!

An Israeli thief found himself literally stuck in a life of crime last week. During an attempt to steal a car radio, things went embarrassingly wrong for this inDUHvidual. The thief was leaning through a car window in order to remove the car’s stereo, but while doing so he accidentally pressed a button and closed the vehicle’s electronic windows, thus trapping himself. The car’s owner, who was alerted by the crook’s cries for help, had to rescue the thief… but not before waiting for the police to arrive.






  1. You know more than 10 ways to order coffee.


  1. You know more people who own boats than air conditioners.


  1. You know the difference between Chinook, Coho, and Sockeye salmon.


  1. You consider swimming an indoor sport.


  1. You put on your shorts when the temperature gets above 50, but still wear your hiking boots and parka.


  1. You know all the important seasons:  Almost Winter, Winter, Still Raining (Spring), Road Construction (Summer), Deer & Elk season (Fall).


  1. You can point to at least two volcanoes, even if you cannot see through the cloud cover.


  1. You are not fazed by “Today’s forecast: showers followed by rain,” and “Tomorrow’s forecast: rain followed by showers.”


  1. You consider that if it has no snow or has not recently erupted, it is not a real mountain.


  1. You have actually used your mountain bike on a mountain.




How many times do you think an inmate can escape from prison in just over a year and a half? 


FILE #1: Not sure how this can possibly happen but apparently during his 17 months’ federal incarceration in Atlanta, Wayne Milton sneaked out nights at least 50 times in order to continue the high-stakes mortgage-fraud business that had landed him in jail in the first place! He was eventually caught and just got a fresh, 20-year sentence for having bribed the prison guards who allowed his freedom. The smooth-talking Milton was reportedly secretly recorded on a prison phone lining up another mortgage loan just days after his initial incarceration.


FILE #2: In Seminole, Florida, 30-year-old Lance Kocses was cited by police for causing a $5,000 accident. According to a sheriff’s deputy, Lance became distracted while making a left turn because he was eating from a bowl of Frosted Flakes.


FILE #3: A classic story… in 1994 Cindy Hartman’s phone rang in the middle of the night in Conway, Arkansas. She discovered an armed burglar ransacking her home. She fell to her knees and asked if she could pray for him. The burglar broke down, joined her in prayer, and apologized. He brought her belongings back into the house, borrowed a shirt to wipe away his fingerprints, and left his gun behind when he drove away.


STRANGE LAW: Whale fishing is illegal in Nebraska and Oklahoma. Ohio bans it only on Sundays.




Charleston, West Virginia, police knew there was a problem with drinking and driving during happy hour.

But they never imagined their daytime sobriety checkpoint would net four drunken driving arrests before 8:30, Friday. Police conducted the happy hour sobriety checkpoint near a Moose Lodge beginning at 4pm. The department issued 32 traffic citations and arrested a fifth person for driving on a revoked license for a previous DUI. Two people arrested for drunken driving attempted illegal U-turns before arriving at the checkpoints, but were quickly stopped by police. The first drunken driving arrest was made just 20 minutes into the checkpoint — at 4:20pm. Says a police spokesman: “This confirms our initial beliefs that there is a problem.”




August is coming up in a few days, and it’s one of only a couple of months that doesn’t have a big holiday. We should come up with one. What kind of holiday can we create?




QUESTION: Who said this… and to whom was it said? “All these things I will give you, if you will fall down and worship me.”  

ANSWER: The devil to Jesus. (Matthew 4:8-9)




QUESTION: What did King Jehoiakim do to Jeremiah’s scroll of prophecies?

ANSWER: He burned it (Jeremiah 36:28)




Pay attention! If our next player doesn’t answer all ten T/F questions correctly we start all over from question #1! First person to answer question #10 correctly is our winner!


  1. When Kleenex was first introduced to the market in 1924, it was marketed as a makeup remover. (True)


  1. When Scott Paper Co. first started manufacturing toilet paper they were too embarrassed to put their name on the packaging. (True)


  1. When Sony introduced the Walkman, it had different names in different countries. (True. It was called “Soundabout” in the U.S., “Stowaway” in the U.K., and “Freestyle” in Australia.)


  1. When the General Mills Trix rabbit made its debut in 1961, the line he said was, “I’m a rabbit, and rabbits are supposed to like carrots. But I hate carrots. I like Trix!” (True)


  1. Honda is the Japan’s largest maker of musical instruments. (False – Yamaha)


  1. The weight of a year’s worth of New York Times newspapers is about 5,000 pounds. (False – 520 pounds)


  1. The largest hailstone ever recorded was 7.5 inches in diameter. (False – try 17.5 inches in diameter; bigger than a basketball!)


  1. On average a baby’s heart will beat about 6 million times before it is born. (False – 60 million times)


  1. In ancient Greece the word ‘idiot’ meant a private citizen or layman. (True)


  1. The great pyramids of Egypt now stand a full 3 miles south of the spot where they were originally built. (True – that’s how much the earth’s surface has shifted in the last 4,500 years.)




You have to match the blank in the tabloid headline with the word or phrase that has been removed!


Fiats were swimming off Miami’s South Beach over the weekend.

The cars were driven by models and drove across the water to islands near Miami.   The cars seemed to handle just as well on the water as the did on the road.  Some say they work even better on the water – especially making turns.

The cars, mostly Fiats, were designed for navigating Italy’s winding, narrow, streets, but they can also ride along the water.  A fleet was seen racing a boat in the ocean off Miami Beach.    The cars get about 30 mph on the road and can get up to 60mph on the water.

President Obama praised the hydrocars, reportedly saying, “This is the kind of innovative approach to travel that we have been looking for.  These cars are safe, fast and they are good for the environment.”

President Obama ordered three of the hydrocars for himself, his wife and his daughter, Sasha (who will be driving soon).Car & Driver magazine says that this may be the greatest automobile every invented.  The hydrocars should be available all across the United States – by September.





The tall, handsome, confident gentleman walked over to the girl and made a disparaging remark about the men who had been chatting her up.

She laughed gaily, “When I don’t want a man’s attentions,” she confided, “and he asks where I live, I just say, ‘I’m visiting here’.”

“Wow, that’s pretty clever,” he laughed, relishing her humor. “So where DO you live?”

“I’m just visiting here.”



“I would like some vitamins for my son,” the mother said as she walked into the pharmacy.

“Vitamins A, B, or C?” asks the pharmacist.

“It doesn’t matter, he can’t read yet.”



A Bishop was approached one morning by a Priest. “Your Eminence,” the Priest said, “there’s a young lad here who claims to be seeing a vision of our Savior in the chapel. What should I do?”

The Bishop jumped up saying, “Well, I don’t know about you, but I’m gonna look real busy!”




Laughter really is contagious. Merely hearing someone else laugh activates the region in your brain involved in vocalizing, promoting actual chuckles.  ***MARLAR: Maybe I should start doing this show with a laugh track.


A study says more time in day care causes more behavior problems in kids. ***MARLAR: You know you’ve chosen the wrong day care when their idea of a large play area is a big screen TV.





Have you ever had a resume rejected? Don’t ever let it happen again. The next time that nasty old rejection letter comes your way, respond with your own:


Dear [Interviewer’s Name]:

Thank you for your letter of . After careful consideration I regret to inform you that I am unable to accept your refusal to offer me employment with your firm. This year I have been particularly fortunate in receiving an unusually large number of rejection letters. With such a varied and promising field of candidates it is impossible for me to accept all refusals.

Despite ‘s outstanding qualifications and previous experience in rejecting applicants, I find that your rejection does not meet with my needs at this time. Therefore, I will initiate employment with your firm beginning on . I look forward to seeing you then. Best of luck in rejecting future candidates.


[Your Name]




A dog with a craving for donuts has been blamed for starting a house fire!

A Ridgefield, Washington family left a box of donuts on the stove and left their house.  The family’s dog jumped up onto the stove to get to the donuts and accidentally flipped on a burner. The burner set the box on fire and the fire spread from the kitchen to the attic. The dog, home alone when the fire started, escaped injury.  ***MARLAR: So I guess doughnuts and hot dogs DO go together!




“I will bless the Lord who guides me; even at night my heart instructs me.” Psalm 16:7

At night, when our hearts are still, God speaks to us. To Solomon, God appeared with a fantastic question, one that we could only dream about someone asking us: “What do you want? Ask, and I will give it to you!” (2 Chronicles 1:7). Solomon’s request should forever instruct us in what is truly important. Instead of asking for riches, long life, or the destruction of his enemies, his simple request was for more wisdom to care for the people of God. Anyone who puts the purposes of God and His people ahead of his own personal fortunes and fame will instantly win the favor of the Lord. “And he will give you all you need from day to day if you live for him and make the Kingdom of God your primary concern” (Matthew 6:33). Let us ask God for wisdom—not to make money or to control others, but to be able to administrate His kingdom with precision. When our hearts are separated from the world, God will give us the finances, physical health, and other things we need to help us accomplish our heart’s desire for Him.

–By Larry Stockstill





READ: Genesis 12:1-9

By faith Abraham obeyed when he was called to go out to the place which he would receive as an inheritance. —Hebrews 11:8

One of life’s most distressing experiences is being separated from the things and the people we love. It is often difficult to leave a house that holds many pleasant memories, and it is always hard to say goodbye to loved ones when we must leave them.

So it wasn’t easy for Abraham to obey God’s demand that he separate himself from his country and his friends and relatives. Yet, without obedience to God’s command, there would have been no blessing for him or his descendants.

God called Abraham to this life of special consecration because He had chosen him to be the channel through which He would work His plan of redemption. The human race had rebelled and become idolatrous, and Abraham needed to worship the one true God.

It is still the duty of all believers to sever connections with anything that hinders our spiritual progress and effectiveness. We must forsake all sin, all self-will, and every worldly pleasure that draws our heart away from God.

If we do this, when we are tested and tried the spiritual fiber of our lives will stand the test. We’ll be strengthened in the process, so that we in turn might be a blessing to those around us. —Herbert Vander Lugt


All for Jesus, all for Jesus!
All my being’s ransomed powers:
All my thoughts and words and doings,
All my days and all my hours. —James


Attachment to Christ is the secret of detachment from the world.





According to a new survey done by the American Psychological Association’s, researchers have found that it’s almost as dangerous to “Think and Drive” as it is to “Drink and Drive”!  They say even as simple a task as visualizing each letter of the alphabet one-by-one while driving can cause drivers to fix their eyes on certain points for long periods – instead of glancing in their mirrors or at the dashboard. Such dangers are likely as well if the driver just “thinks about the concerns of his or her day”.  ***MARLAR: So what do you say when the officer pulls you over for speeding? “Sorry officer, I wasn’t thinking” OR “Sorry officer, I was just thinking”?




Ladies, if you just can’t get enough coffee, there’s a lipstick just for you.

…The cosmetic company “Hard Candy” has a coffee-flavored lipstick. Company founder Dineh Mohajer said, “The idea was women are drinking coffee in the morning and putting on make-up. We thought we might as well combine them.” Each stick has 18 mg of caffeine and wearers are supposed to get a “hit” each time they lick their lips. They currently have three different shades of beige — Café o Lip, Latte Lip and Lipachino. A brilliant red caffeinated color called “Redeye” is in the works. ***MARLAR: This is a great thing for guys too. You kiss your wife goodbye, and save the time and money you would’ve spent at Starbucks!


Did You Know: A new study reported in the Journal of the American Medical Association found drinking coffee everyday may prevent Parkinson’s disease. Researchers in Hawaii studied 8,000 men and found those who don’t drink coffee are five times as likely to get Parkinson’s as those who drink between four and five cups a day.





Once, rubber bands bound things together. Then they became makeshift weapons: Loop one end around a thumb, pull the other and pop at your little brother’s big head. At some point, someone — maybe a bored office worker — started wrapping them together, and balls began to form. And they just kept getting bigger.

…Houston, Texas, resident Dean Wade started his ball back in 1975, when he worked at a downtown bank. He noticed a security guard’s rubber-band ball and asked how it was made. Figure it out yourself, the guard replied rudely. Wade did. That’s how Reba — yes, his ball has a name — was born. She weighs just 105.7 pounds, which sounds like a lot of rubber bands. But in the world of rubber-band hobbyists, she’s far from being ready for a spot in the Guinness Book of World Records. Guinness folks report that the current record-holder for largest rubber-band ball is John Bain of Delaware, whose ball weighs 3,120 pounds. Still, the 49-year-old said he won’t stop growing Reba until she’s the largest ball in the world. He says he shooting for 10,000 pounds. Wade is retired and lives with his mother on a fixed income. He suffers from epileptic seizures, making it difficult to work. He can’t afford to buy rubber bands and relies on donations from friends and family. ***MARLAR: Couldn’t he just write a check? No – because it’d bounce.





The summer movie season is in full swing. So Men’s Health came up with this list of things happen all the time on screen, but never in real life: “I’ve never…”

  • Bumped my head and gotten amnesia.
  • Left the water on in the bathroom sink long enough to flood the whole house.
  • Been chased through the forest, tripped, and twisted my ankle, compromising my escape, but I still say, “Don’t stop. Go on without me.”
  • Been stuck in an elevator.
  • Been stuck in an elevator with a pregnant woman.
  • Said, “Open this door or I’m breaking it down.”
  • Found myself on top of a moving train.
  • Picked a lock with a credit card.
  • Said, “Don’t do it, man. Just give me the gun.”
  • Been to a wedding where someone stood up and objected.
  • Collapsed onto my car horn.
  • Seen a bunch of homeless guys standing around a flaming trash can, singing doo-wop and wearing gloves with the fingers cut off.
  • Dialed a “555” phone number.
  • Closed my medicine-cabinet door and seen someone in the mirror who wasn’t there 3 seconds ago.
  • Run into a church where the girl I loved was about to get married to someone else, but upon seeing me stopped the wedding and professed her love to me.
  • Rushed to the airport to stop the woman I just realized I love from leaving, and as I get to the gate, I see her plane pulling away, and then feel empty because I think that my best chance at love is now gone, but, as I turn away, she’s standing there because she decided at the last minute not to get on the plane because she realized that she loves me too and was hoping I would come to the airport to get her.





Cool stuff Bounce dryer sheets can be used for… other than freshening up the smell of your laundry (supposedly – I haven’t actually tried any of these things)…

  • Bounce will chase ants away when you lay a sheet near them.
  • It takes the odor out of books and photo albums that don’t get opened too often.
  • It repels mosquitoes. Tie a sheet of Bounce through a belt loop when outdoors during mosquito season.
  • Eliminates static electricity from your television screen. Since Bounce is designed to help eliminate static cling, wipe your television screen with a used sheet of Bounce to keep dust from resettling.
  • Freshen the air in your home. Place an individual sheet of Bounce in a drawer or hang in the closet.
  • Prevent thread from tangling. Run a threaded needle through a sheet of Bounce before beginning to sew.
  • Prevent musty suitcases. Place an individual sheet of Bounce inside empty luggage before storing.
  • Freshen the air in your car. Place a sheet of Bounce under the front seat.
  • Clean baked-on foods from a cooking pan. Put a sheet in a pan, fill with water, let sit overnight, and sponge clean. The anti-static agent apparently weakens the bond between the food and the pan while the fabric softening agents soften the baked-on food.
  • Eliminate odors in wastebaskets. Place a sheet of Bounce at the bottom of the wastebasket.
  • Collect cat hair. Rubbing the area with a sheet of Bounce will magnetically attract all the loose hairs.
  • Eliminate static electricity from Venetian blinds. Wipe the blinds with a sheet of Bounce to prevent dust from resettling.
  • Wipe up sawdust from drilling or sand papering. A used sheet of Bounce will collect sawdust like a tack cloth.
  • Eliminate odors in dirty laundry. Place an individual sheet of Bounce at the bottom of a laundry bag or hamper.
  • Deodorize shoes or sneakers. Place a sheet of Bounce in your shoes or sneakers overnight so they will smell better in the AM.
  • Take the used sheet from your dryer and then wipe the lint trap with it. It cleans it perfectly.

***MARLAR: Tie a sheet to the outside handle of the front door of your house to ward off door-to-door salesmen.  I don’t know if it’ll work or not, but Bounce seems to be able to do so many other things, it might be worth a shot.




(Mondays Only)


A doctor in Rochester, New Hampshire is in trouble with the medical board – all because he told the truth to one of his patients!

A doctor in Rochester, NH, has been reprimanded for telling an overweight patient that she was endangering her health. The woman wrote to the state medical board to complain about Dr TERRY BENNETT, who insists he’s just doing his job.  Bennett says he’s given the same lecture to many obese patients, and he’s not happy. He tells the Manchester Union Leader: “Did I have an affair with a patient?  Did I give somebody drugs? Was I careless? No. End of story.”  He wrote a letter of apology to the woman but that wasn’t enough for the medical board, which referred the case to the Attorney General’s Office. They tried to get him to attend a medical education course and admit he was wrong. He refused.  Many patients have come to Bennett’s defense, signing petitions and writing letters. MELINDA HANEY started the petition drive and says, “What really makes me angry is he told the truth. How can you punish somebody for that?” Haney says Bennett gave her the same advice and at first, she didn’t wanna listen. “I have been in this lady’s shoes. I’ve been angry and left his practice. I mean, in-my-car-taking-off angry,” Haney said. “But once you think about it, you’re angry at yourself, not Dr Bennett. He’s the messenger. He’s telling you what you already know.”

Result: he’s helped her lose 150 pounds. Bennett says simply, “I told a fat woman she was obese. I tried to get her attention. I told her you need to get on a program, join a group of like-minded people and peel off the weight that is going to kill you.”




When it comes to food, the world has two major, conflicting problems: Hunger and waste. But a new powder could help address both of those issues, simultaneously. According to the Huffington Post, Earlier this month, a group of students at Lund University in Sweden completed a successful Kickstarter campaign to support the scaling up of their business model, which consists of receiving cheap, nearly expired fruits and vegetables from grocery stores, processing them into a food powder, called FoPo, and selling that powder back to the markets. The powder is innovative in that it extends the shelf life of garbage-bound produce from two weeks to two years while still maintaining much of its taste and nutritional quality.



Self-proclaimed “fat guy” Eric Hites was 560 lbs and unhappy with his weight. His marriage was falling apart. And he wanted to get a new job. So he decided to do something unexpected: go on an epic bike ride across America. The goals? Lose weight, write a second book, and rescue his flailing relationship with his wife. According to the Time article, Hites is currently two months into his trip and has already lost 60 pounds.



NASA last week announced the discovery of Kepler-452b, the most Earth-like planet ever found. According to NBC News, the planet is located 1,400 light-years from our planet. NASA called it “Earth 2.0,” because it’s the first small, rocky planet discovered in the habitable zone of a G star similar to our sun. The $600 million Kepler Space Telescope, which launched in 2009, has also discovered 11 other less notable new planets. The Kepler mission searches for Earth-like planets.





I don’t mind the rat race, but I could do with a little more cheese.




(Updated as it comes available. The Way WE Work is written by Mark Elfstrand from 1160Hope.com in Chicago.)

Please Tell Me How You REALLY Feel

No doubt you have seen those bumper stickers on company vehicles asking, “How’s my driving?” Then there’s a phone number to call. I doubt anyone has called the number to say, “Hey, I’m following Joe’s Landscaping truck number 46111 and he’s driving really well. Using turn signals and everything!” Not gonna happen.
While in Branson, Missouri, recently, we stopped at a grocery story for a few items. And for some Starbucks. Before leaving, we used the store restrooms. Bad news. Both of the towel dispensers in my room were empty. Stuff on the floor. Overall, it just needed attention.
I saw a toll free number on the mirror asking for feedback if the restroom needed attention. I called. A friendly person took my comments and said they would contact a manager right away. I didn’t stick around to watch. But I felt like I’d done my lavatory civic duty. I liked the feel of immediate response.
Many companies use different methods to get customer feedback. Secret shoppers provide some real life customer experiences. There’s now a lot of receipt-based requests asking for you to complete a brief survey on a company. Even my doctors’ offices asking for online feedback on their services. (Response: Too long waiting!!!)
What I was surprised to learn recently is the number of companies asking for employee feedback. The information management is seeking measures worker satisfaction. And new apps give a lot of this information in real time — rather than just an end-of-year survey.
In a Fast Company article titled, “Unhappy at Work? Swipe Right to Tell the Boss,” I found out about several of these apps. http://www.fastcompany.com/3046843/unhappy-at-work-swipe-right-to-tell-the-boss
Here’s one example: “So for quick daily happiness check-ins, the company (Bunny, Inc) uses an app called Niko Niko that lets employees quickly swipe across their smartphone screens to indicate their overall moods, or to answer more specific survey questions. A touch-and-drag happiness meter and corresponding smiley (or frowny) face lets employees say how they’re feeling about everything from their relationship with their managers to the cleanliness of the corporate offices.”
Apparently, over $700 million a year is spent by companies to measure and boost employee engagement. Better engaged workforces have payoffs. That includes higher productivity, employee retention, and worker safety. All leading to improved profitability.
Another app is used to get feedback from job prospects. While not a perfect measurement tool, it aids in discovering whether a prospect for a job might be a good fit. They also get information from new-hires and from exit interviews. Clever.
Here’s the critical piece in using these employee response methods. As one exec says, the “kiss of death is to ask questions and do nothing about it.” When employees see results from their feedback, morale jumps. When they don’t, this becomes a waste of money and time.
As you might suspect, there is a lesson from the Bible that applies here. It is found in the book of James, chapter two, verses 14-17:
“Dear brothers, what’s the use of saying that you have faith and are Christians if you aren’t proving it by helping others? Will that kind of faith save anyone? If you have a friend who is in need of food and clothing, and you say to him, ‘Well, good-bye and God bless you; stay warm and eat hearty,’ and then don’t give him clothes or food, what good does that do? So you see, it isn’t enough just to have faith. You must also do good to prove that you have it. Faith that doesn’t show itself by good works is no faith at all—it is dead and useless.”
Discovering what people want and need to improve their quality of life is only valuable if there is a commitment to meet those needs. Pretty basic stuff. Let those in management who have ears…hear.
Now…back to my Survey Monkey.
That’s The Way WE Work.




Marie Asner has been reviewing films for over 30 years. Her outlets include radio, print and Internet. For more in-depth movie reviews of the following films, visit www.Tollbooth.org. Ratings from 1 (Low) to 5 (High).


JULY 24, 2015…


Southpaw—Jake Gyllenhaal stars in this boxing film of a man almost defeated in life, who tries a comeback. Jake has a tragedy in his life and his daughter is missing.  Forest Whitaker comes to the forefront as a trainer who gets Jake back into shape. (Gyllenhaal really got into shape for this role.) Rachel McAdams is Jake’s wife. “Southpaw” is rated R. Rating of 3 for sports fans.


Pan—This is a different concept, indeed.  Take the usual “Peter Pan” story and make it one with Blackbeard (Hugh Jackman) instead and the children he kidnaps, especially Peter (Levi Miller). to work in his mines. Captain Hook is played by Garrett Hedlund and something in the vein of Johnny Depp’s “Jack Sparrow.”  Tiger Lily is played by Rooney Mara.  Ah, yes, not your usual story here, but the characters are based on the Barry stories.   “Pan” is rated PG 13. Rating of 2 for fans.


Pixels—What would happen if the alien invaders turned out to be past video games? Pac Man running around the city, etc. That is the premise of this movie starring Adam Sandler and Kevin James as two guys who figure this out. They are helped by Peter Dinklage (“Game of Thrones”), Michelle Monaghan and Josh Gad.  “Pixels” (directed by Chris Columbus) is rated PG 13. Rating of 2 for fans of video games.


Paper Towns—The film is adapted from a book by author John Green (“The Fault In Our Stars,.”) “Paper Towns” is a comedy/mystery  about a young man Quentin Jacobsen) who falls for the girl next door, Margo Roth Speigelman , who, in turn, involves him in a mystery and then disappears. What to do? He begins his journey. Also in the cast is Halston Sage. “Paper Towns” is rated PG 13. No rating.


JULY 31, 2015…


Vacation is a comedy with Ed Helms and Leslie Mann about revisiting the National Lampoon vacation spots.


The Gift is a thriller starring Jason Bateman and Rebecca Hall


Mission Impossible: Rogue Nation is a Tom Cruise action film and plenty of stunts, including hanging from a plane in flight.


The End Of The Tour (opening in select cities)  stars Jesse Eisenberg as a reporter out for a great interview.


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