NATIONAL HEADACHE AWARENESS WEEK is this week. ***MARLAR: If you’re not aware that you have a headache, you probably don’t have one.
Today is NATIONAL SHUT UP DAY. ***MARLAR: Yeah right. If I didn’t listen to the boss the other 364 days of the year, what makes anybody think I’d do it today?
Today is CELEBRATE THE HEAT DAY, sponsored by the National Anxiety Center, where they believe there is no global warming and that being warm is great. ***MARLAR: Anyone remember twenty years ago when we were all freaked out about the new ice-age scientists told us was coming? Whatever happened to that?
Today is WORLD ENVIRONMENT DAY, sponsored by the UN. ***MARLAR: We should hook these folks up with the people at the National Anxiety Center – that’d be quality entertainment right there!